Surrendered(37)

I laugh, not because it’s funny, but because it’s ridiculous. “What, so you think James Hardy is going to try and what…hurt me?”

He shakes his head. “No…look, I don’t know.”

“So you think he’s going to try and sleep with me or something?” He doesn’t answer, but the sheepish look on his face tells me all I need to know. “Wow. You arsehole.”

“No!” He rushes to me. “It’s not like that. I just… I don’t know what he’s capable of. He’s a prideful man, wealthy, powerful…I just, I don’t like you working with him.”

I roll my eyes. “Theo, if I dodged every man whose girlfriend or fiancée you’d fucked, I’d be in isolation.”

“I deserve that.” He mumbles.

“It’s not a dig, it’s just fact. I’m yours, and I’m not going anywhere. I will tread carefully with Hardy, but I am not about to lose a valuable client. Please just trust me?” I decide not to divulge my strange conversation from earlier. Knowing what I now know, I have to wonder what the hell Hardy is up to. Why would he want me to get Theo on board, a man he clearly hates?

He eyes me carefully for a few seconds and then nods his head. “Look, I should go, and leave you to work. I won’t be around for a couple of days.” His tone is standoffish. I understand that he feels insecure about this, but honestly, I have a career to think of. He’s a big boy. It’s unlike him to not be around for two days though. I’m usually fighting for my own space.

I frown. “Where are you going?”

He reaches out and strokes my cheek. “Just some business in Europe that I have to take care of. Very last minute. I’m flying out tonight and should be back by Sunday lunchtime.” He leans in and kisses my forehead. “I’ll swing by the flat on Sunday.” I get this sudden tightness in my chest, like a small panic that he won’t be here…which is ridiculous and pathetic on more levels than I care to think about.

“Okay.” I nod, trying desperately to hide my disappointment.

His eyes find mine, his face just inches from mine. My heart skips a beat. “I’m sorry baby, and I’m sorry about tonight, I just…I love you, more than anyone or anything.” I nod wordlessly. He presses his lips to mine in a slow, passionate kiss. He holds my face in both hands, as if I’m precious. “I love you.” He whispers against my lips.

“I love you.” I press my lips to his one more time. He pulls away from me and picks up his jumper. He pulls it on and grabs his keys from my desk.

“I expect you to eat all that food.” He smirks easily, fun, cocky Theo again.

I roll my eyes. He laughs and moves to the door. The latch clicks shut with a heavy finality. I sit in my chair and release a breath. Shit. Being with that man is like riding one big arse fucking roller coaster. Everything with us is so intense. When we love it’s intense, and when we fight it’s intense. We’re like gunpowder, just waiting to go off at any point. I used to shy away from that, but now I think that maybe that’s what life is all about. I’ve been numb for so long, and now I want to feel everything that Theo has to offer me, the good, the bad and the ugly. We’re both in new territory, both prone to explosive outbursts and over dramatic reactions. If I’m ever going to work it out with someone though, then it’s going to be him.

I’ll miss him whilst he’s away, and that scares me. Stupid, I know. I’m terrified that if I miss him, then I won’t be able to cope without him. He tells me there is no door, no way out, but there’s always an out isn’t there? Words are after all, exactly that, just words. I don’t think I could shield myself from him anymore, even if I wanted to. I’ve already admitted to myself that I need him, I’m just clinging to the girl who needed no-one, the girl who couldn’t be hurt, because she didn’t care. That girl was lost and lonely, but she was bullet proof. She was strong. This girl is stronger for having him beside me. I just have to try and trust that that is where he will always be, because without him, I worry that this girl might crumble.

Strange how you can become so strong, yet so vulnerable at the same time.





CHAPTER EIGHT

THEO





“Dude, you have no booze on your plane. What the fuck?” Hugo whines as he raids, the now empty, liquor cabinet.

“We are going to be in Monaco for twenty four hours. I need you sober. You’re supposed to be helping remember?”

He pops his head up from inside the cabinet. “I feel totally jilted. A trip to Monaco you said. I thought it would be like the old days. Me, you, vodka and some serious amounts of trust fund pussy, but nooo…” He keeps talking, but I switch off.