Straddling the Line(62)
Haven nodded. “I know you do.”
Her mother turned to her. “And so do you. Your father would be so disappointed in you if you allowed your world to stop because he died.”
Haven inhaled on a sob. “I know he would. But I miss him so much.”
“We still have each other. For as long as I’m alive, we’ll still have each other. But you have to go out and find your life, my sweet baby girl. Promise me you’ll do that.”
Her mother wrapped her up in her arms. And just like that, she felt the warmth of love surrounding her. It was as if for that moment, she felt her dad’s presence there, as well. Maybe it was just her imagination, or wishful thinking, but a sense of well-being enveloped her.
“I will. I promise, Mom. Things will be better now. For both of us.”
She looked at her dad’s headstone, and for the first time since he died, she was able to think about the future without that future feeling empty.
Okay, Dad. For you. For Mom. It’s time for all of us to move on.
TREVOR PUT AWAY THE LEFTOVER STEW AND DID THE dishes, and even made another pitcher of tea, needing to keep his hands and his mind occupied while he waited for Haven and her mom to get back. When he heard the car doors, he wiped his hands on the dish towel and pulled out clean glasses in case they wanted a drink.
Haven was the first to show up in the kitchen.
She arched a brow. “You did dishes?”
“Yeah. Are you still hungry?”
“No, I’m fine.”
“How about some tea? I made more of that.”
“Aren’t you all domestic. I’d love a glass of tea.”
He poured her a glass and handed it to her. “Where’s your mom?”
“She went upstairs.”
“Are you okay? Are the two of you okay?”
“We’re good now. Thanks.”
He took a seat next to her. “Do you want to talk about it?”
She took a couple of swallows of tea. “Not particularly, other than to apologize to you as well. I wasn’t my best today, but things are going to be better now.”
She didn’t owe him any explanation. That was between her and her mother. “You don’t have to apologize to me, Haven. I told you before that you’re allowed to feel however you feel.”
“Thanks for that. But I was rude, especially to my mom.”
“You settled that, though, didn’t you?”
“Yes.”
“Okay, then. Nothing more to talk about.”
She took a deep breath. “I thought we might go for a walk, if that’s all right with you.”
He nodded. “Sure.”
She grabbed her zip-up hoodie and he pulled on his sweatshirt before they stepped outside.
Trevor felt the chill in the air, even through his sweatshirt. It made him think of football. Crave it. He wanted to be in Tampa, with his team. Much as he’d hated losing to Atlanta, to be shut out of postseason baseball, he had to switch his mind-set.
Tampa had already played three games without him. He had to get his ass in gear and his body ready for football. He was already in shape, but football was a different game.
“You’re quiet,” Haven said.
“Thinking about football.”
Her lips curved. “Already making the switch mentally?”
“Yeah.”
“And you’re ready to play.”
He shifted his focus to her. Her eyes were red rimmed and swollen. Time to shut off thoughts of himself and his game. “I’m ready to play. How about you?”
“What about me?”
“How do you feel?”
They’d arrived at a public park just outside campus, so he took her hand and led her to one of the picnic benches. They sat on top of the bench.
“I feel fine now. I went to the cemetery. I talked to my mom, and I know this sounds silly, but I also talked to my dad. Everything feels clearer to me.”
“Good.”
“I guess I was stuck in the past and I didn’t want anything to change. I didn’t want my dad to have died.” She looked over at him. “I’ve been in denial, refusing to face a life without him.”
He swept her hair away from her face. “It’s been hard for you.”
“Yeah, it has been. And that I can face now. It’s been hard. It probably always will be. I think that’s what was so hard about seeing my mom tonight. She was moving forward, and it appeared to be so easy for her.”
“It’s not easy for her, Haven. You have to realize that.”
“I do now. It was petty and childish of me to say those things to her, to accuse her of not mourning my father. She loved him. With everything she had, she loved him every day they were together. She still does.”
He nodded and scooted closer to her. “You both did. He was a very lucky man to have both of you.”