Sinful Desires Vol. 5(8)

Hope flared in Julien's eyes and I watched him reign it in.

“I didn't sleep with you that night because I was trying to get over Reed or Brock, and I didn't do it out of pity either.”

A muscle in Julien's jaw twitched and I knew I'd struck a nerve. That was what he'd thought. It made sense. If he'd been convinced I was still on the rebound, it was no wonder he considered our night together a mistake.

“I wanted to comfort you,” I admitted. “But more than that, I wanted you.” I put my hands on his chest and he sucked in air. I was laying it all out on the line now, risking everything on the hope that he felt for me the same way I felt for him. “I wanted to know what it was like to kiss you, touch you.” My body was just a couple inches away and longed for more contact. “To feel you inside me.”

“Fuck, Piper,” he breathed the words before his mouth came down on mine.

I slid my arms up around his neck as he pulled me against him, his grip almost painful. His lips parted mine as he kissed me and I could feel his need, his want. Months of angst and desire poured into me and my entire body throbbed in response.

He broke the kiss, but didn't let me go. His forehead rested against mine as we caught our breath. When he could speak, he said, “I am so sorry for avoiding you.” He put his hands on my cheeks, his skin burning against mine. “I thought I could handle it, being just your friend, and then we slept together and I was lost. I couldn't be around you if you were with someone else. It hurt too much.”

I brushed my lips across his, needing to do something to ease the pain I heard in his voice.

“These past couple weeks have been torture,” he confessed. “I couldn't get you out of my mind. I'd stare at the same page for an hour but not know what it said. I haven't been able to sleep much, and when I do, you're there too.”

I remembered my dream the night after I’d gone out with Reed, the one that had made me finally admit how I felt about Julien. “I dream about you too,” I said.

The smile that broke across his face made things tighten low inside me. I waited for him to kiss me again, to slowly strip off my clothes. His lips and tongue to taste my skin. My nipples hardened at the thought of his mouth on them, sucking and nibbling. The ache between my legs grew as I remembered what it had been like to have his head down there, devouring me. The stretch of him filling me...

He took a step back and I nearly stumbled. He put out a hand to steady me, but didn't take me in his arms again. Rejection washed over me. I didn't understand.

“I want to do this right,” he said, his expression saying he'd correctly read my feelings. “As much as I want to take you upstairs and ravish you.” His eyes sparkled at the word. “I want to take it slow.”

Was he kidding? I knew my mouth was hanging open and snapped it shut when he chuckled.

“Trust me, Piper. I want you.” He took my hand and threaded our fingers together. “I've wanted you from the first moment I saw you.”

My eyebrows shot up.

He nodded. “It's true. You walked out onto that stage at The Diamond Club and I wanted you. Brock didn't tell me who you were until the end of the dance and I felt horrible that I'd been ogling my friend's girl, but I couldn't quit thinking about your body. Then I met you and you were even more beautiful in person. I couldn't figure out how an ass like Brock had managed to snag someone like you.” He brought our hands up to his mouth and brushed his lips across my knuckles. “I tried to fight it, even after I saw the way he treated you, but once I heard what he'd done, I knew I couldn't deny it anymore.”

“And all that means you don't want to take me to bed?” My question was half-teasing.

“It means that I already started things out wrong when we slept together before. You deserve better than how I treated you.”

A lump formed in my throat. Of all the men in my life, Julien was the only one who hadn't done anything wrong and he was the one apologizing.

“So,” he said. “I want to take you out on a proper date. Not us hanging out here with pizza and beer, or even us going out as friends. I want this to be a real first date. Will you go out with me this Saturday?”

I smiled. “I'd love that.”

He gave our hands a yank to pull me toward him, but the sudden movement made me step wrong and I couldn't hold back the pained cry as my ankle nearly buckled. Julien caught me.

“What's wrong?” His face was mere inches from mine, but I could see that kissing was the last thing on his mind.

“I twisted my ankle,” I confessed. “Came down on a jump wrong.”

“And you were running around on it?” He sounded annoyed. He scooped me up in his arms, ignoring my protest. “You need to get off of it.”

“I'm fine,” I said as he headed for the stairs. “I can walk.”

“Nope,” he flat-out refused.

As he started up the stairs, I put my arms around his neck to help with balance. I had to admit it was nice not having pressure on that ankle and more than nice to be in his arms. He set me down on my bed and gently disentangled my arms. His eyes darkened as they slid across the sheets and blanket. I knew he was remembering that night and the warmth radiating from his eyes spread through me.

He bunched up an extra blanket and placed it under my sore foot. “I'm going to get you some ice,” he said. “And then I'm going to call Anastascia and tell her it's safe to come back.” He pointed at me. “Don't even think about getting up for the rest of the day.”

“Are you going to stay and take care of me?” I asked, blinking prettily. I placed my hand on my stomach and ran it up to cup one of my breasts through my shirt.

Julien made a sound in the back of his throat and his hands flexed. “If I stay, you're not going to get much rest.”

I smiled. “I'm okay with that.”

He glared at me. “Anastascia is going to make sure you behave and I'm going to call you off work for the next two days.” He held up a hand to start to protest. “It's either that or I drag you to a doctor and he makes you give up dance for a few weeks.”

I looked at him, to see if he was serious. He narrowed his eyes and mine widened in response. “Okay,” I said, pouting. “Your idea's better.”

“Good,” he said. “Now I'm going to get that ice. Don't move.”

I watched as he walked out, amazed at how things had turned out. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and placed it on my nightstand. There was only one more thing I had to do, but I'd wait until Julien left to do it.





Chapter 8

A part of me had wanted to take the easy way out and do this over the phone, but I owed it to myself to do things right. I'd forgiven Reed for what he'd done, but if I didn't meet him face-to-face, I'd feel like I was being vindictive, purposefully being rude for past grievances. And despite what had happened, I truly felt Reed was a good man and deserved better.

I'd wanted to meet him right away, but Anastascia had put a stop to that, reminding me I wasn't supposed to be up and around. So I'd reluctantly put it off until Wednesday and resigned myself to feeling guilty until then. Fortunately, Anastascia took Monday and Tuesday off to make sure I didn't do anything other than go to dance, so she kept my mind off of things.

Nothing, however, could keep me from being nervous as I walked into the little café where I'd arranged to meet Reed. This was going to be hard, not because I doubted I'd made the right choice, but because I didn't know if Reed would be angry for all of the things he'd given up to be with me. I really didn't want to cause a big scene in public.

I rubbed my hands on my jeans to dry them, took a deep breath of icy air and stepped inside. The rush of heat made my cheeks tingle even though I'd only been outside for the couple minutes it had taken to walk from where I'd parked Anastascia's car to the café door. I scanned the room and saw Reed raise his hand from a back booth. I smiled and nodded a greeting. I doubted I'd be able to eat breakfast, but some coffee was a necessity if I was going to get through this.

After I got my order and took a sip to make sure they'd gotten it right, I made my way around the maze of tables and slid into the seat across from Reed. The hopeful look in his eyes made my stomach clench. I wasn't sure which would be easier, easing into it or using the band-aid approach and just saying it outright.

“So...” His fingers tightened around the cup in his hands.

I couldn't bring myself to keep him waiting anymore. Band-aid approach then. I kept my voice as gentle as possible, knowing it probably wouldn't soften the blow. “This isn't going to work between us, Reed.”

Hurt flashed across his eyes and he reached for my hand, taking it between both of his. “Please, Piper. I know I fucked up. Let me make it up to you. I promise I can be a better man.”

I gently pulled my hand away. “I'm sorry.” I shook my head. “What we had.” I struggled to find the right words. “It was too intense, based purely off of emotion and physical attraction. I'd had a crush on you and we were both vulnerable. The sex was great, but whatever connection was there, it wasn't real.”

His mouth tightened. “Things could be different this time. I've changed.”

I nodded. “I know you have.” And he had. The fact that he'd stood up to his parents was huge. “But I've changed too. I've learned a lot about myself and done some growing up. One of the things I realized was that we aren't right for each other.”