Shadowed(122)

“Oh?” Nina smiled at her, feeling more in control of herself. I don’t miss him, she told herself. I don’t need him. I’m fine.

“Yes,” Maggie went on, her eyes shining. “The Kindred scans have indicated a large variety of local flora and fauna. I just can’t wait to start classifying them! The papers I can write…I’ll literally never run out of material.”

“I never saw anyone get excited about writing a paper before,” Nina said, grinning.

Maggie smiled ruefully. “Oh, I must sound like a huge nerd, huh? But I just can’t help myself—I love finding out new things.”

Nina couldn’t help laughing—the other girl’s enthusiasm was infectious.

“Well, it sounds like you’re going to have a lot to find out about. Who are you traveling with?”

“Some Kindred scientists—a married couple.” Maggie sighed. “I wish I wasn’t the only human going, but the Kindred were really firm about it and my fiancé, Kurt, is buried in his own research right now anyway.”

“Oh, is he a scientist too?”

Maggie nodded. “A molecular biologist. He made me promise to bring back plenty of samples.”

“How long will you be gone? I bet he’s really going to miss you.”

“Six months to start with.” Maggie shrugged. “Kurt probably won’t even notice I’m gone except he’ll have to make his own coffee—which irks him when he’s in the middle of a research project.”

Nina raised an eyebrow. “Not exactly the warm and fuzzy type, huh?”

Maggie gave her a little half-smile. “No, more like the calculating and analytical type. But you know, we both have our work to keep us busy. Some days we go from morning until night without saying a word.”

“Really?” Nina asked doubtfully. “That doesn’t sound like a very, uh…That sounds interesting,” she amended.

Maggie shrugged again. “I know it sounds strange, but it’s perfect, really. As a scientist, you need a significant other who won’t interrupt your work or get upset when you’re so into your research you don’t have time for anything or anyone else. Kurt and I are both really good at that. Kurt especially—he’s really good at it.” She sighed, and Nina thought she looked a little bit sad.

“When do you get started?” she asked, trying to change the subject.

Maggie brightened. “We’re actually leaving tomorrow, but we’re not going straight to Gaia. We have an errand to run on another planet first which is kind of on the way.”

“What planet?” Nina picked up a handful of sugared almonds and began doling them out into the little baggies she’d created with the lace and ribbons.

“A place called Yonnie Six, I think?” Maggie frowned. “We have to deliver some kind of a collar…”

“A Hurkon collar?” Nina throat suddenly felt tight.

“Yes, that’s right. How did you know?”

“I…I…” Nina shook her head. Suddenly, the fragile web of lies she’d been building for herself—that she was over Reddix, that she didn’t love him anymore—came crashing down. “I’m sorry,” she said, rising abruptly. “I…I need to get away.”

“Away where? Are you all right?” Maggie stood too, for once not knocking anything over in the process, and went around to Nina. “Hey,” she said awkwardly, putting a hand on her shoulder. “You look awful. What’s really going on?”

The simple act of kindness undid Nina completely. Though she tried not to, she started to cry.

“I’m sorry,” she said, putting a hand to her face. “I just…I miss him so much. I’ve tried to tell myself I don’t care and I’m over him, but I don’t…don’t think I’ll ever get over him. From the first minute he kidnapped me, there was just…something about him. I knew I shouldn’t let myself fall for him, but I couldn’t help it! I mean, there we were, stranded on a planet full of people who communicated with emotions and he has RTS—or had it anyway—and he couldn’t stand it so I had to touch him to keep them from hurting him, and then we had to feed the collar so it wouldn’t shock him, and even though I kept telling myself I was only doing what was necessary, I couldn’t help feeling for him. And then later, on Tarsia when he said he wanted to spend his life with me, and then he…he…I…I…” She shook her head and burst into fresh sobs.

“Um…Okay. Everything is going to be okay…” Maggie put an arm around her tentatively. “I’m sorry,” she said in a low voice. “I never know what to say in this kind of situation, and I don’t understand hardly any of what you just told me, but it’s clear somebody really hurt you.”