Savage Awakening(16)

Fliss gasped. 'He's not writing an article about you,' she protested,  hoping that was true. 'You really are paranoid, aren't you? Do you think  the world revolves around you?'

Matt's mouth tightened. 'I've had that impression,' he muttered.

'Well, not from me,' said Fliss staunchly, levering his fingers from her  arm and stepping back. She took a deep breath. 'Now, did you want  something? If not, I've got to finish these cupboards.'

Matt stared at her for another long moment and then shook his head, as  if by doing so he could clear his mind of what he'd been thinking. 'Oh,  yeah,' he said, raking fingers across his scalp as she'd fantasised  about doing only moments before. He sighed. 'I came to ask you if you'd  prefer to be paid by the week or the month.' He paused. 'It's your  call.'

Fliss felt a slightly hysterical desire to laugh. His words had  certainly put things in perspective. 'Am I going to be here long enough  to find out?' she asked, before she could stop herself, and Matt's mouth  twisted.

'Well, I want you to stay,' he said, and once again she had to struggle with the desire to ask him why.                       
       
           



       

'That's good,' she said instead. 'I-well, I had wondered.'

'Why would you do that?'

He seemed genuinely puzzled, and to add to her confusion he reached out  and tucked one errant strand of fiery hair behind her ear. His fingers  brushed her skin, and Fliss felt the heat explode beneath them. He had  no idea what he was doing to her, she thought, and that brought her  briefly to her senses.

'I-because of what you said about my father,' she stammered a little  breathily, trying desperately to remember who he was and why she was  here. 'You weren't exactly pleased to discover he worked for the local  paper.'

'Ah.' Matt nodded, as if that explained everything. But instead of  withdrawing his hand, he allowed his knuckles to trail along the curve  of her jawline. 'You shouldn't take what I say so literally.' His thumb  brushed her mouth, and then returned to abrade her parted lips. 'You're  very trusting, aren't you, Fliss? You make me wish I were not such a  burned-out husk.'

'You're not burned out,' she responded at once, and almost involuntarily  her hand came up to cover his. She told herself later that she'd  intended to push his fingers away, but when his thumb probed inside her  mouth, all the strength drained out of her legs.

For that moment in time, she couldn't think of anything or anyone but  him. The rights and wrongs of what she was doing didn't even come into  it. And as if he had been startled by her unexpected action, Matt's eyes  darkened, and with a muffled sound he bent towards her and replaced his  fingers with his mouth.

It was just a fleeting kiss, but its effect was electric. Her lips  parted instinctively, and she felt the sensuous touch of his tongue.  Need, hot and totally inappropriate, invaded her system, causing her to  step half-involuntarily towards him. The blood was pounding through her  veins, consuming her with her own body's needs, and even the distant  clang of warning bells couldn't halt the urge she had to deepen the  kiss.

With goose-pimples dancing along her skin, she had no thought for Diane  or anyone else. There was liquid fire in her belly and a yielding ache  between her legs and for the first time in her life she understood how  irresistible sexual desire could be. She'd had a taste now and she  wanted more, and she uttered a little moan of protest when he abruptly  gripped her upper arms and put some space between them.

'This is not a good idea,' he said thickly, and Fliss stared up into his tormented face in sudden comprehension.

Dear heaven, what was she doing? He was engaged to Diane, for heaven's  sake. Whatever she thought she'd seen in his eyes was for someone else.  Not her.

Her mouth was suddenly dry and she ran a nervous tongue over her lips  before saying desperately, 'I'm sorry, I'm sorry.' She spread her hands  wide, wishing the floor would open up and swallow her. 'I-I don't know  what came over me. You're right. That-shouldn't have happened.'

'Forget it.'

His voice was harsh, but she didn't kid herself he was saying that  because he felt any responsibility for what had just occurred. It was  even possible that he was feeling sorry for her, and that was worse. She  couldn't bear the thought that he and Diane might laugh about this  behind her back.

'Look,' she said uncomfortably, 'if you'd rather I left now, I'll quite  understand. I'm sure you won't have any difficulty in finding someone  else to take my place.'

'Do you want to leave?'

His question startled her. 'I-it's not what I want, is it?'

'Isn't it?'

'No.' She realised she was still standing there with her arms spread and  hurriedly dropped them to her sides. 'I mean, it's going to be  difficult for us to work together after-this.'

'For you, you mean?'

'For you, too.' Fliss stared helplessly at him. 'All I can say is that I've never done anything like this before.'

'I believe you.' A hint of a smile touched his lips again. 'From what I've heard, your last employer was in his nineties.'                       
       
           



       

Fliss flushed. 'That's not what I meant,' she said, her fear that he  might find the situation funny resurrecting itself. 'I don't-get  involved with men.'

Matt held her gaze. 'Except with the man who fathered your child,' he  remarked wryly. 'I'm surprised you didn't marry him if you have such  conservative views.'

Fliss's lips tightened. She wasn't sure but she thought that might be an  insult and she wondered what Diane had told him. And, even though she  never discussed Amy's father with anyone, she felt compelled to defend  herself.

'I didn't want to marry Amy's father,' she said stiffly. 'And I certainly didn't plan on having a baby at sixteen.'

'So why take the risk?' Matt's brows ascended. 'Forgive me, but you must have known what would happen, even at sixteen.'

Fliss shook her head. 'You don't understand.'

'So enlighten me.'

'Why should I?' Fliss gave him a defiant look.

'Because I'm interested.'

'Curious, don't you mean?' He shrugged, and although she suspected she  was going to regret it later, she said, 'I was naive. I'd never been the  kind of girl to-well, to get involved with boys. I'd always been more  interested in my school work, in getting good grades.'

'Admirable.'

'Yes.' She didn't know if he was being sarcastic or not, but she went on  anyway. 'I was flattered by an older boy's attentions, and I made a  mistake. End of story.'

'But it wasn't the end of the story, was it?' he said. 'You had Amy.'

'Yes, I did. And Terry and his parents left the village telling everyone who would listen that he wasn't the baby's father.'

'Nice guy!'

She pulled a wry face. 'It was all for the best really. It would never  have worked.' She glanced about her at the worktops piled high with  goods she'd taken from the cupboards she was cleaning. 'Anyway, I'll  just tidy this stuff away and then I'll go.'

Matt folded his arms across his midriff. 'Are you still annoyed with me?'

Fliss shook her head. 'No. I'm annoyed with myself.'

'Why?'

'Because I don't want you to think I regret anything that's happened.'

'Not even us sharing a kiss?'

She flushed. 'Not even that.'

His lips twisted. 'Well, don't worry about it. As you said, it's not going to happen again.'

'No, it's not.' Brushing past him, she lifted the broken steps out of  the way and shoved them next to the back door. Then, lifting the bucket  she had been using into the sink, she emptied the water away. 'And as  far as paying me for this week is concerned, you can have it on the  house.'

He muttered something that sounded suspiciously like a swear-word, but  as it wasn't spoken in English she couldn't be sure. In any case, she  was appalled at her own behaviour. It was all right making those kinds  of gestures when you could afford it. Unfortunately she couldn't.

Matt shifted then, coming to stand with his back to the counter beside  her, his frustration evident. 'Look, can't we forget all this nonsense  and start again?' he demanded.

Fliss turned her head. 'You really want me to stay?'

Matt expelled a weary sigh. 'Yeah. I really want you to stay.'

She considered. 'And you won't-tell Diane what happened?'

Once again a quirk of amusement tugged at the corner of his mouth. 'No, I  won't tell Diane,' he promised. Then, with a strangely mocking  expression, he turned away. 'Take my word for it, she'd never believe  it.'





CHAPTER EIGHT





MATT spent the rest of the day cursing himself for letting the situation  with Fliss develop as it had. It would have served him right if she'd  decided she didn't want to work for him after all. And, in spite of  everything, he wanted her to stay.

With hindsight, he didn't know what had possessed him to act the way he  had. What crazy urge had compelled him to touch her at all when he knew  damn well that nothing would-or could-come of it?