Ruined And Redeemed(5)

It was locked.

Instantly, panic rose, and Charlotte scanned her surroundings with frantic eyes. Was there another door she could try? Or were they all locked?

The window!

Charlotte’s head snapped up. Yes, she could smash the window. If only she had…

Glancing around, Charlotte’s eyes fell on a spindly looking chair, an abandoned walking stick…and then she saw the potted plant. Sitting in a ceramic pot filled with dirt, it ought to have the needed weight to break through the glass.

Determined, Charlotte strode over, her hands reaching for the key to freedom.

Lifting it, she groaned. The inactivity of the past few weeks? … months? … years? … had robbed her of all the strength she’d once possessed.

Approaching the window, she stood sideways at the best angle for her to aim, took as deep a breath as she could without coughing her lungs out, and hurled the potted plant at the window.

The second the glass burst into a million pieces, her heart rejoiced.

Was she truly ready to die?

Scrambling through the window, Charlotte felt small shards dig into her hands and legs. As the blood ran down her skin, a memory of long ago resurfaced.

Once again, she saw Kenneth’s face before her, his kind, warm eyes looking into hers. “Marry me, and I swear I’ll protect you,” he’d said, and he had meant it.

Lost in her past, Charlotte flinched when shouting reached her ears. Somewhere to her left, people were running about, arguing.

“We have to do something. They’re all going to die.”

“Do you truly want to go back in there? Don’t be an idiot!”

“But−?”

“Forget it! I’m not risking my life for those bedlamites!”

As the harsh world around her came knocking on the door to her soul, Charlotte shrank back. Receding little by little, her fog disappeared, leaving her vulnerable and burdened with a life she didn’t deserve. Why was she not locked in her cell, waiting for death? After all, no one deserved it more than she!

But she wasn’t dead. So, the question remained: what now?

Taking a tentative step forward, Charlotte swallowed as she proceeded toward the angry shouting. Her skin crawled with the apprehension she felt at encountering the man who had spoken so harshly. But had he been wrong?

Confusion entered her mind, and Charlotte felt reminded of the struggle that had been her daily bread not too long ago. What was right or wrong? For a long time, she had not been able to tell them apart, and she was not certain if she ever would be able to again.

Stopping in her tracks, Charlotte inhaled deeply, and her body rejoiced as clean air filled its lungs. For a moment, she closed her eyes and then peeked around the corner.

As the flames began to devour more and more of the building, the doctors and orderlies stood on the front lawn, watching as most of their patients were trapped inside, with death waiting to claim them.

Even years later, Charlotte could not say what happened in that moment. But her feet refused to carry her any further. She knew she ought to return. She knew she belonged there, not among decent people. And yet, she turned around and walked away.





Chapter Two – Life & Death



At what point she’d lost her shoes, Charlotte did not know. Stumbling through the underbrush of the dense forest surrounding Winham Institute, she simply kept walking as stones and twigs cut into her feet. It was an old, familiar kind of pain, and yet, a part of Charlotte felt as though she was experiencing it for the first time.

Occasionally, a small voice would claim her attention. Unfortunately, it was not Kenneth. She hadn’t heard him since leaving the asylum’s grounds hours ago. No, this voice came from deep within her, incessantly asking a question she had stubbornly chosen to ignore: Where are you going?

As the sun began to set, she sighed, cursing the nagging voice. Finally, she decided to answer if only to silence it. However, her only response was, “Onward.”

What else was there? After all, she had nowhere to go. She had no family, no friends. She was dead to the world, and if she didn’t return, even her parents would believe the lie. They would finally be free of her, and the scandal she had brought down upon them.

But even so, she had to go somewhere. If going back was not an option, then where?

“Onward,” Charlotte mumbled as her fingers trailed through the tall-stemmed grass spreading out before her. Leaving behind the forest, she welcomed the day’s last rays of sunshine on her face, warming her chilled skin and bathing her in a glowing light that pained neither her eyes nor her soul.

After crossing the field, she looked around as the sun slowly disappeared behind the horizon. Night was falling fast; soon, she would be blind, unable to see the ground in front of her. Her eyes began to droop as though suddenly realising how long she had gone without rest. As though objecting to being neglected, her stomach rumbled and churned demanding to be fed.