Rose(72)

He reached out and touched her, barely brushed her cheek, but Rose could hardly concentrate well enough to answer.

“I know, but somehow your talking about my lips doesn’t make me feel like a beast of burden.”

“I’ve seen many beautiful women. It seemed the world was full of them only a short time ago. But for them, beauty was an end in itself. They were the eyebrows and lips and skin and hair and nose you so want to hear praised. But that’s all they were. A collection of beautiful parts.”

His hand trailed down the side of her arm. The feeling was so intense it was almost painful.

“You don’t think I’m nice to look at?”

“Yes. Even Monty thinks you’re pretty. And if you can stop him from thinking about cows for as much as five minutes, you must be stunning.”

Rose laughed in spite of her hypersensitive arm. “I never thought I’d be pleased to have a compliment phrased exactly that way, but a lot of things have happened I never expected.”

“I’m not doing this very well, am I?”

“No. As a matter of fact, you’re making a pretty wonderful mess of it.”

George let his hand slide all the way down her arm until he took her hand in his.

“What I’m trying to say is you’re beautiful. But your beauty means so much more because of the person you are inside, what you’re willing to give of yourself, what you’re willing to share without demanding something in return.”

She could feel the pressure of his thumb as it traced circles on her skin. Even in the face of such a small attention as this, it was hard to think of leaving.

“You’re doing a little better now.”

“The more I got to know you, the more I found myself drawn to you. I thought of your lips. They seemed to haunt me almost as much as your eyes. But they haunted me because they were your lips, not just because they were so beautiful I couldn’t stop thinking about them.”

“You’re doing much better,” Rose murmured, her eyes closed, her starved soul rejoicing in the nourishment of his words.

“I wanted to hold you in my arms and kiss you, and not just because it felt so wonderful. I wanted to hold you because of the little things you did to please me, the times you stopped what you were doing to pay attention to Zac, because of the times you were too tired to go on but you did because you were doing something for us.”

“Go on.”

Pulling gently, he drew her close to him.

“I found after a while I didn’t feel quite as content, quite as comfortable, if you weren’t around. Out on the range I would find myself wondering what you might be doing now. When I’m at the house, I find myself looking up to see where you are. When I have a decision to make, I wonder what you might think about it. You have invaded my mind and thoughts so thoroughly I can’t imagine your not always being here.”

He pulled her closer. They didn’t touch, but Rose could feel his body heat.

“I got angry, then jealous, when Monty started flirting with you. It was a shock to think somebody else liked you. It was even worse to think you might like him. I knew then I wanted you to like only me.

“I told myself it wasn’t fair to say anything when I had nothing to offer. But that day at the creek, I guess I forgot about being fair. I wanted only to kiss you, to know you liked me a little.”

Through the material of her dress, Rose could feel their bodies brush. Her breasts became more excruciatingly tender than her arm.

“You’ve always known that,” she said.

“It wasn’t enough when neither of us could speak of it.”

“You told me from the first you never wanted a wife or a family. Why should I talk about something I could never have?”

George put both his hands on her shoulders. Instinctively Rose leaned toward him.

“For the same reason I wanted to hold you in my arms and kiss you. Because I couldn’t help myself. What did you mean just a minute ago when you said That’s what any woman wants to hear from the man she…?”

Rose tried to pull away, but he wouldn’t release her.

“It’s not fair…”

“Nothing’s fair. You wanted the truth from me. Now I want the truth from you.”

Rose was tempted to tell him a lie. Why should she bare her soul to a man who seemed to have none? Sure, he admitted to liking her, being attracted to her, drawn by the quality of her character, but that wasn’t a warm emotion, one capable of igniting a passion which would last a lifetime. It wasn’t strong enough to build her life on. It wasn’t tough enough to shield her from Jeff’s abuse.

But there was something there. Something which had sustained her feeling for him all these weeks. Something which had caused the feeling to deepen into love. Did she know what it was? Could she tell him if she did?