Romance Impossible(86)

"Max, I..." She swallowed, trapping her lower lip between her teeth again. "Of course I still..." Her eyes were suddenly filled a pain she'd been hiding, carefully, for such a long time. And I knew the feeling. I knew it so well. "Of course. Max, I never...I never stopped."

The air positively crackled with anticipation. I felt lightheaded. I felt alive.

"I know I've done this once before," I said. "But please - could I take you out for dinner tonight? I need to ask you something important."

She just watched me, and I could see her pulse fluttering by her throat. "Is it about a job?" she finally managed to ask.

I smiled, hesitantly. "No," I said. "No, Jill, it's not about a job."

"Ask me now," she said. "Now or never, Chef."

Her eyes shone, and I knew I didn't really need to say anything. But I wanted to.

I owed her that.

"I've done a lot of stupid things in my life," I said, smiling a little. I came closer, and reached down so that I was just touching the underside of her chin. Very lightly, but her eyes closed for a moment, lingering that way before they opened again. "I don't have to tell you that. I know there's no use in apologizing for the many indignities I've put you through, but I'm going to, anyway. It's long overdue. I'm sorry, Jill, for everything - for being who I am, because you deserve better. But more than that, I'm sorry that I tried to make that decision for you. If you really think I'm what you deserve, well - that's your decision."

The beginnings of a grin tugged at her mouth.

"I should have given you the credit you deserved," I said. "But that would have meant admitting you were competent to manage your own life, and - well, then what do you need me for?"

Her eyelids fluttered again. "Maybe," she said, her voice very soft, "maybe you don't always need to be needed. Maybe it's okay just to be wanted."

I knelt down and I kissed her, then, because what else could I possibly do?

We tumbled onto the bed at some point - exactly how, or what happened to get us there, I'll never know. She kissed so eagerly, so urgently, and I eventually gave up on my efforts to slow her down.

We had all the time we wanted. But after all those wasted chances, I didn't blame her.

I worked my way down her body, pushing her dress up, kissing her thigh where the skin tasted so sweet and shower-fresh. And higher up, where I discovered something that made me lift my head and look at her, shaking my head.

"Very naughty," I said, enjoying the blush that spread across her cheeks.

"I didn't have another pair," she said.#p#分页标题#e#

"So you went without." I ran my hands up her legs, her thighs, to her waist and stomach, unencumbered by anything beneath her dress. "Well, that's only logical, isn't it?"

I wanted to see her blush grow deeper, to watch her face transform as I kissed my way up higher, but it was impossible. All I could do was enjoy the sounds, and feel the small tremors in her legs as I worked my way to the center of her thighs.

Really, I would have forgiven her for making some joke about food or gourmets or an appreciation for the finer tastes in life; I'd heard them all before, but she was far too lost in the sensations, and I loved her all the more for that.

She moaned and writhed, tensing up and shuddering under my tongue so quickly that I almost didn't believe it. But when I looked up, her face was flushed and glowing in a way that was unmistakable.

I didn't have time to react before she was pulling me down to kiss me again, sucking the taste of her off my tongue, such a sweetly filthy thing that it sent a jolt straight down, making me almost painfully hard.

"Come on," she whispered, urgently. Always in such a rush.

"Relax." I grinned, wriggling out of my shirt. "It's the journey, not the destination, right?"

"God damn it." She locked her ankles around me, pressing up into me with relentless need. "You're a bastard, Maxwell Dylan."

"I know," I said, planting a kiss on the tip of her nose. "But I love you - that has to count for something, right?"

Her face grew serious for a moment, even through the haze of arousal.

"I love you," she breathed, her hand resting on the back of my neck. "I swear to God I do. I hope you've finally figured that out."

"Well," I said. "I am the smartest guy in the room."

Jill let out a squeal of laughter, socking me on the arm before I had a chance to silence her with a long, slow kiss. Moments later, I finally gave her what she wanted. She gasped, then sighed, taking a moment to really accept it all. I'd never get tired of that.