Relinquish(58)

“Enough.”

Bastien’s command startles me enough that I actually do let go of my knife. It clatters to the ground and I realize I’m free of her hold.

Pressing against the ground, I leap to my feet, cautious and confused. The girl shakes out her hair, adjusting the collar of her uniform. It is so tight that I’m convinced someone had to pour her into it. I can see a red line beginning to appear along her neck.

“I told you she’s not so tough.” The woman snorts, casting a withering glance in my direction.

My grin widens as I toss out my hand and snatch a board. Before she has a chance to duck, I whack her upside the back of her head. She cries out and falters forward, but Bastien is there to steady her.

He offers me a warning glare as he helps the girl stand. I frown, crossing my hands over my chest. “Want to tell me what this is all about, Bastien?”

I can almost feel the woman’s anger rolling over her as she widens her stance and faces off with me. Her vivid green eyes flash with barely controlled anger at what she obviously considers a cheap shot. Bastien sighs and releases her arm.

The instant he does, the woman pounces. She leaps into his arms, crushing her lips against his with such fierce passion that I’m astounded. Bastien seems stunned at first but finally manages to untangle himself from her grip.

He steps back, placing physical space between him and the girl. His chest rises and falls as heat stains his neck. He clears his throat and refuses to make eye contact with me. “Illyria, this is Niyah… my girlfriend.”



I don’t remember too much of the remainder of my trip. The steady pounding of my heart matches evenly with the stomping of my feet as I walk up the dirt road that leads toward Bastien’s base.

I know I’m going in the right direction because of how worn down the path looks. On the edges, I can see deep signs of tire tracks still left over from the ice storm that passed during the night. It looks like this area got a lighter version of our blizzard. I can tell a truck passed by here not too long ago.

Did it drop Niyah off earlier this morning for a secret rendezvous with Bastien? Was he supposed to sneak out and meet up with her? Was she the one he was whistling to yesterday?

Bastien’s sidelong glances throughout the morning are enough to drive me mad. Why didn't he tell me about her? seems to be set on repeat in my mind.

I spend lunch by myself, adamantly trying to ignore Bastien’s whispered conversation with Niyah. Although they speak in low tones, there is tension between them, and I can’t help but feel happy about that. I don’t really remember eating. Only that I did and it tasted like mud in my mouth.

Now I walk beneath a speckled pattern of sunlight that sneaks through the clouds above, unblinking and unwavering in my need to show him how much I don’t care… but I do.

With each stomp, I can feel my anger mounting, wishing it was Niyah’s head underfoot instead of muddy slush. I notice absently that my pants are splattered up to my knees, but I don’t care.

Another voice needles its way through my anger. Is this really so different than what I have done with Eamon? I grit my teeth and send a spray of brown snow into the air with a stomp. Shouldn’t I be happy he has moved on?

“You’re acting childish.” A voice calls from just over my shoulder.

I shoot a defiant glare at Bastien and continue walking. He easily keeps pace with me despite the extra weight of my pack on his back. I can hear Niyah walking behind us, feel her haughty gaze upon me. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“At least let me explain.”

I stop so suddenly he gets four paces ahead of me before he turns and comes back. I ignore Niyah as I get up into his face. “I’m here for one thing and one thing only. The mission. If you think any of this”—I stab a finger between him and Niyah—“matters, then you are wrong.”

“Illyria—”

“No.” I shake my head, feeling a spark of electricity skip down my arms. I’m starting to lose control. I need to get away. “Just back off, Bastien.”

“I can’t.”

When I lift my gaze to meet his, he takes a step back. I watch as he pales and finally nods, raising his hands in surrender.

I turn and stomp on, knowing what he saw. I could feel the color of my eyes fading to black as easily as I felt the electricity on my arms. If there is one thing I’ve learned over the past year, it’s knowing when I’m at my breaking point.

Bastien taught me that the day Drakon tried to kill him. I nearly tore down the entire city on top of my friends for him. I vowed after that I would learn control, or at least learn my trigger.