Redeeming You(23)

“Okay.” She walked into the small one stall bathroom with peeling paint and cracked tile. “What are we doing in here?” she asked.

Cam pulled her against him. “I’ve been dying to taste your lips since I saw you checking me out on stage.”

She bit the inside of her cheek so she didn’t laugh. “I wasn’t checking you out,” she said.

“No?” One side of his mouth lifted into a lopsided grin. “Hm…I guess that was some other woman. Maybe I should go back and look for her. She was definitely interested in me. Maybe I’d have better luck elsewhere.” His hand reached for the doorknob.

“You’re not going anywhere.” Standing on her tiptoes, she leaned into him brushing a kiss against his lips.

“I’m not?” he said chuckling against her lips.

“Definitely not.” She placed her hands on either side of his face, staring into his deep blue eyes. “Now shut up and kiss me.”

A wide grin spread across his face as he wrapped his arms around her waist. “Can’t argue with that.”

He captured her mouth in a kiss, his lips firm and warm against hers. His mouth coaxed hers to open, and when she relented, she fell under his seductive spell again. His taste, his smell and everything uniquely Cam surrounded her, making her lightheaded with lust. She wanted to breathe him in and never let go.

His hands swept along her curves to her shoulders until he finally buried his hands in her long hair. Slowly pushing her backwards until he had her pressed against the dingy white tiled wall, he slid his thigh between her legs, rubbing back and forth. Breathless, she squirmed against him, ready for anything and wanting so much more.

Dropping her hands to his waist, she dipped her fingers below the waistband of his pants, grazing her fingertips over the head of his erection and he shuddered.

“We’re not having sex right now,” he groaned, his voice dark and pained. “Not here, not like this.”

Her hand drifted to his shaft palming it lightly. “Why not?” she asked, kissing his square jaw line, his course stubble stinging her swollen lips.

“You’re Alec’s sister,” he mumbled under his breath. He lifted one of her legs around his hip as he ran his nose along the hollow of her throat. She arched her neck giving him more access. God, that felt amazing. “And I don’t want any misunderstandings between us.”

He was right. She shouldn’t trust him with her body or her heart. Cam went through women like water, even when he had Bre. Granted, since Bre left him, he was worse than before, but she couldn’t risk being one of many. Her heart wasn’t strong enough, and even though she claimed that she didn’t want something serious, she never intended for their time together to be meaningless. Before she took this thing with him any further, she had to know that he cared, that he respected her, even a tiny bit. Intimacy wasn’t something she took lightly. She’d been broken too many times in her life and she wouldn’t willingly let it happen again.

“I know. You’re right,” she said softly.

Slowly releasing her leg, he stepped backward, and her hand fell to her side. “I don’t want to rush this,” Cam murmured, his eyes filled with something she refused to investigate. “I just wanted to kiss you tonight before we got on the bus. That’s it. We won’t have much time alone for a while after that.” He brushed her hair from her face and then he tilted her chin up, cupping her face. “And I’m going to miss touching you, tasting you and exploring every inch of you.”

The way he looked at her, as if he really saw her and he still wanted her, made her want to weep with relief and run as fast and as far away as she could manage. She’d spent her life building an armor to isolate her heart from the emotional chaos that permeated her childhood. Now, people only saw what she let them see—a cold, hard, emotionless woman.

Miles never made it through her emotional armor even though he systematically tried to break her down with his constant barrage of insulting comments. In fact, Miles had called her frigid a couple times, and even though he apologized later, she knew he meant it because that's how she felt about herself most of the time. His actions only convinced her of the merits of remaining aloof, because letting people in meant reawakening the gnawing feelings of inadequacy burned into her brain courtesy of her mom.

For the most part, her frosty demeanor succeeded in keeping people away, with the exception of Miles who, in reflection, only pursued her because of Alec and Chasing Ruin. She suspected that was why he continued to call her as well. He thought she’d be instrumental in handing him the break that his shitty band craved, but every time he pushed her to send a demo tape to Alec, she refused. She’d never liked asking Alec for favors. He’d done more than his fair share for her since their father died and their mother became a worthless shell of a human being. Asking Alec for one more favor for a guy she only partially liked didn’t sit well with her.