Chapter 1
His arms are around me before I have time to react. I'd imagined this moment the way women do when their hearts crave to be with the man they once loved. In my dreams, Parker would race through the lobby of my building in New York City, sprint up the stairs and pour his heart out to me the second I opened my apartment door. He'd fall to his knees and tell me that life without me has no meaning and is empty. Now, feeling Parker's strong arms circling my waist, all I feel is numb.
"Kayla." I can sense the smile in his voice, even though his face is buried in my hair. "I can't believe you're here."
"Don't." I push against him, mustering any lingering strength I can find. "Let me go."
"What are you doing here?" His lips press against my temple. "Did you miss me?"
"I heard what you said." I try again, in vain, to shove him away. "I heard you and Ben talking."
He pulls back so harshly I almost lose my footing. "You heard us?"
I turn towards Ben. His face is void of any expression. I can't tell if he's surprised to see me or not. There's no way he could have known that I'd be listening in on his conversation with Parker. He didn't expect me to be here. He thought I was tucked away quietly in New York, planning my best friend's wedding to his brother.
"I can explain what you heard." Parker's hand is on my chin, trying to turn my face towards his. His voice is the same as it's always been, joyous and oblivious to the tribulations that dot other people's lives. Even now, weeks after he'd broken my heart and moments after he inadvertently confessed to taking money from Ben in exchange for avoiding me, he's positive. His tone is a clear indicator that he still believes that everything will be fine, as long as he sees it through rose colored glasses. He expects the pieces of his life to fall into place, regardless of how much pain he causes others to get there.
I can't look at him. I won't make eye contact with him. How is it even possible that these two know each other? "You took his money."
He nods loosely before his eyes flash to Ben and then back to me. "I want you to marry me."
Whoever said that timing is everything couldn't have known how ironic the words can be. "Marry you?" I mimic them back just to hear how utterly ridiculous they sound coming from my own mouth.
"I love you so much. I realize that now." Parker's voice is breaking as he tilts his chin down towards my palm. "I've missed you."
"Shut up," I bark at him, not just because I can't absorb what he's telling me, but also because I feel my stomach lurching with each of his romantic pronouncements. I don't want Parker to love me. I don't want him to tell me he wants to marry me. I wanted that. I ached for that but it's different now.
I twist my head back around to look at Ben. "You gave him money to stay away from me?"
"Kayla." His voice is low, calm and controlled. "We need to go somewhere alone. I need to talk to you in private without Parker."
"No." I shake my head. "We're not going anywhere. You're going to tell me what's going on right here. I want to know right now."
"Baby, you came back to be with me, didn't you?" Parker ignores everything I just said to Ben. "You still love me, right?"
"No." I take a heavy step away from him. "I came here to talk to Ben."
"Ben?" His hand shoots past me, his index finger flying in Ben's direction. "You came to our apartment to talk to Ben?"
"I came to Boston to talk to him," I correct. "I'm not here because of you."
"You're in our apartment, Kayla." There's no disguising the confusion in his tone. "Why are you in our apartment?"
My mind skips back trying to retrace its path. How did I end up here? Why am I standing in the same apartment I shared with Parker mere weeks ago, holding an engagement ring? I pull my hand over my face, glancing down at the small box in my other palm. "I wanted my damage deposit back."
"You what?" His eyes narrow. "You're in our apartment because of the damage deposit?"
It's such a meaningless point right now. I had no idea when I used my key to get back into the home I shared with Parker that my life would splinter into a million pieces inside these walls. "The super said you moved out so I came to clear out your things."
His eyes float down to the box. "You found the engagement ring when you were going through my things?"
I nod, my hand extending out to him. "Take it back. I don't want it."
His blue eyes darken. They look the same as they did the night he left me. "It's your ring, Kayla. It's the one you wanted. I bought it for you."