Phoenix Rising(15)

Even after a nice hot shower, the reflection in the mirror looked haunted. Dark smudges below her eyes added years to Jessa’s face. And the pallor of her skin made the sprinkle of freckles across her cheeks seem unnaturally dark.

She almost went back to bed. Nobody was going to tip the old hag a few extra bucks for a drink.

The thought of tips made her cringe. It’d been years since Jessa had waited tables. What if she folded under the pressure?

A few deep breaths seemed to help bring things back into perspective. It was a bar. And it wasn’t exactly a nice bar. It wasn’t as if they had a gourmet kitchen with a five star menu to memorize. Not to mention the unlikelihood of embarrassing herself in front of anyone she knew. Besides, Alex had seemed very nice. She might even have fun working with him.

Which brought the subject back around to Connor.

What kind of a man acted like that? He was a big sexy bastard, too arrogant by half.

But he wasn’t. There hadn’t been one trace of arrogance in the way he’d acted the night before. He’d been polite while doing his job, cordial when offering her a job, and solicitous about making certain Jessa was okay after she’d overdone it.

But what about after that? What about the highhanded way he’d justified the blatant exchange of exhibitionism and voyeurism going on in his bar? Connor had passed judgment on her without knowing anything about her. His pronouncement that she belonged in a hedonistic place like that was ludicrous.

She shouldn’t go back. Jessa had no business being in a place like that much less being employed there. She didn’t belong there. Not really. Not anymore. Perhaps once in her life, before Will, before she’d transformed herself into the perfect example of wifely restraint.

That, of course, was easily dealt with. After all, Jessa could always walk away from the bar if she got sick of Connor.

Get sick of Connor? Who was she kidding?

A mental photograph of Connor popped into her mind with almost no effort. Tall, heavily muscled, bronzed skin, in short he had the body of an Adonis. It was altogether too easy to recall the sexy-as-hell bow of his upper lip as it glistened with moisture. And it was impossible to forget the sensational lust she’d experienced at the mere sound of his voice.

The white cotton bathrobe was suddenly too warm. The weight of it against her flushed skin was simultaneously too much and not enough. Jessa’s breathing quickened. Heat bloomed between her thighs.

What was wrong with her? She didn’t lose control of herself like this.

Jessa tore her gaze away from the mirror’s reflection and turned on the faucet. The cold water cooled her skin. But nothing could put out the raging fire inside her body.

Nothing but a thorough fucking.

Jessa didn’t waste time reprimanding her mind on its dirty thoughts. She turned the water off and made a split second decision. It wasn’t something she did very often. Consequences were carefully weighed against gains before decisions were made and executed in the best possible manner. But this had gone far past the point of no return.

The dildo was where she’d left it, safely buried at the bottom of a lingerie drawer she never used. Jessa tossed half a dozen rarely used pairs of satin panties to the floor in her haste. The massive thing was flesh colored and covered in some kind of cyberskin that claimed a realistic feel. At that point, she was past caring.

Jessa lay on her back in the middle of the bed. One shaky hand untied the belt of her robe. The sides fell open and Jessa was more exposed than she had been in long years. The bedroom door was wide open and it was light outside. She’d been a late-at-night-in-the-dark-with-the door-closed-and-locked kind of girl her whole life.

The ceiling fan whirred above. Cool air wafted over her heated skin. Jessa’s nipples jutted into the air when her areolas puckered against the unfamiliar stimulation. Tentatively running a hand over her breast, Jessa rolled one nipple between thumb and forefinger. Blood rushed in, hardening it into a tiny point. It swelled and elongated between her fingers. The sensation was wonderful. A zing pulsed from breast to clitoris. Feeling braver, she wetted her fingers on her tongue and opened her imagination.

The first thing that popped into Jessa’s mind was the couple she’d seen in the shadowy back corner of the bar. His tongue had laved all around her taut pink nipple before drawing it deep into his mouth and suckling it to throbbing awareness. Jessa slid her other hand down her abdomen, tickling her belly. Her breath caught as the muscles shrank away and quivered at her tentative touch.

Connor wouldn’t have been timid. There was nothing timid about that man. But thoughts of Connor should not have slipped into her mind. He was forbidden, even more so than what Jessa was doing.