Chapter One
“Jessa? Are you even listening to me?”
“Hmm?”
A spring rain spattered against the massive windows flanking the fireplace in the formal living room. The water streaking down the long panes mingled with the pale afternoon light to cast intricate patterns of light and shadow on the bleached oak hardwood floors.
“Aren’t you going to say anything, Jessa?”
An abrupt variation in the light patterns revealed a custom blind on one of the second story windows was slightly askew. The flawed shadow made the high backed brocade sofa seem even less inviting. But it wasn’t meant to be inviting. You didn’t buy a six thousand dollar sofa because you wanted to sit on it.
Jessa Kincaid looked up at her husband of nineteen years. What could she say? It wasn’t as if there were any decisions left to make. Will had made them already.
“Is she a good fuck?” The crass word tripped off her tongue before she could stop it. It felt good.
Will’s eyebrows lifted in mild surprise. She wondered if it was her choice of words or the question that surprised him most. For all that they’d been married since college, he really didn’t know her that well. But how could Will know her when she didn’t know herself?
“Jessa, do you really want an answer to that?”
“I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t want to know.”
He sighed and paused to gather his thoughts. Will Kincaid had been the other half of Jessa’s life for so many years she’d kind of forgotten what it was like not to have him around. He was good looking, in a businessman kind of way. She supposed he’d be attractive if you liked that kind of thing. Green eyes, light brown hair, wavy, thin on top and cropped short. In the beginning, his eyes had drawn her the most.
But looking at him now, when he’d dropped a bombshell confession, the nicest thing Jessa could find to say about him was that he’d at least managed not to let his body go to fat. If he’d been fat, she doubted she’d have lasted nineteen years.
Nineteen years. After so many years of being someone’s “other half,” was it any wonder she didn’t know who she was anymore?
“At least she gets excited when I touch her.”
Ah, the nail in the proverbial coffin of their relationship. It was undoubtedly true. A hazy mental picture of Will running his hands down the torso of some faceless woman drifted through her mind. A searing jolt of heat hit below her belly, shocking her.
“What else?” Her voice sounded husky and she tried to clear her throat. She’d die before letting Will know his infidelity was more of a turn on than a betrayal.
His eyes softened and shifted with guilt. Jessa hid a smile when she realized he mistook her arousal for pain.
“You knew I was sleeping with her.”
“Why do people say that?” she wondered out loud. “Seriously, how much sleeping do you really do with her? Just say what it is, Will. Fucking. You’re fucking her. And you probably like it. I’ll bet she’s damn good at sucking you off, too. Because we all know that’s what you like the most.”
Jessa was satisfied to watch his face pale several shades.
“Okay,” he drew the word out slowly. “Yes, she’s comfortable with oral sex.”
“It’s called a blow job, Will. Honestly, you’d think you read this stuff in an encyclopedia.”
Her nipples hardened beneath her thin silk blouse, but it had nothing to do with the anger she didn’t feel about a betrayal she didn’t care about. What was wrong with her? She should care. Will was her husband. He’d shocked her, certainly. Yes, shock, that’s all this was. Anything else was…was just wrong.
“Ginny wants me to move in before summer is too far gone. With her kids out of school, it will be a good time for me to get to know them.”
Jessa turned away, absently picking up a pillow from the armchair and fluffing it. “Well, isn’t that convenient.”
“You can’t tell me you didn’t see this coming, Jessa. I can’t remember the last time you put forth any effort in the bedroom.”
A nasty undertone in his voice made her flinch. Will’s jaw leapt as he ground his teeth and ran restless fingers through his hair. He was fighting for control.
She unconsciously held her breath, keeping the chair between her and Will. His temper had always been there beneath his nickel-slick executive exterior, waiting for Jessa to anger him just enough that he could no longer contain it. But she hadn’t goaded him to anger in years. She kept her head down like a good girl and did everything a proper society wife was supposed to do. But oddly enough, his last accusation had been altogether true. He couldn’t remember the last time she put effort into their sex life because she’d never put any effort into it. Why bother?