On Second Thought(76)

"Here," he said, handing me a bottle of water. "Rinse and spit."

I obeyed. Realized I was gripping his hand.

"Rough night?" He knelt down in front of me and smiled, his eyes kind.

"You're a good guy," I whispered.

"That's what they tell me."

For a second, I just looked at him.

"It's gonna be all right," he said, and I believed him. "I know it's  complicated, Kate, but we're in this together. I'll be a good dad,  you'll be a great mom and...and this is gonna be fine. Okay?"

"Okay." I took a deep breath and looked at the Club's front door, where  people were still streaming in. "You know what? Maybe it's best if you  just drop off the swing at the Coburns' house. I sort of missed the  moment. Is that okay?"

"You bet." He stayed where he was a moment longer. "Feeling better?"

"Yes."

He smiled, and I loved him a little then.

Daniel helped me out of the truck, held me by the shoulders for a minute to make sure I was steady.

"Their house is on the same street as mine," I said. "Half mile down. It's a big brick place with a white front door."

"Got it. I'll call you later."

I could feel his eyes on me as I walked back to the main entrance. Up  the four stairs, holding my gown up so I wouldn't trip. Then I looked up  and saw Madeleine.

"You nasty whore," she said. "You're pregnant with that man's baby."

* * *

Why she'd been invited, I didn't know. Maybe she hadn't been. It hardly mattered now.

We went into the room where I'd just been with the Coburns.

She'd seen me from the window, leaving when everyone else was coming in,  she said, and suspected something was off. It was one of the many  things Nathan had loved about her, she said-her uncanny intuition. And  so she'd spied.

"I guess we know what kind of a person you really are," she said, her lips white.         

     



 

"Madeleine, I...I would appreciate you not telling the Coburns."

"Oh, believe me, they're going to know."

"Not tonight, please. This day is hard enough."

"They should know what kind of pretender their son married."

I closed my eyes. "I'll tell them tomorrow." My hands were shaking, and I  felt dizzy and starving and wretched. "I'm moving soon. Back to  Brooklyn."

"Good. I hope they never see you again. You never deserved their son."

"Why are you here, Madeleine?" I asked.

"Because I support their foundation," she said. "Because I love them."

Because she would never recover from having drawn that line in the sand  with Nathan-children or her. She'd never get over the fact that he  didn't desert me. She thought they'd have more time.

Just as I did.

"I'm sorry for your loss," I whispered. "I know you loved him so much."

Her eyes narrowed into slits. "I don't need your pity," she snarled.  "Just make sure you tell the Coburns. I'll call Eloise tomorrow night to  make sure."

"Kate!" Brooke stood in the doorway. "There you are." She looked from me to Madeleine. "Is everything okay?"

"We're fine," Madeleine said. "Excuse me." She left the room with her head held high, her gown swishing.

"I'm sorry if she upset you," Brooke said, putting her arm around me.  "You're white as a ghost. She wasn't invited. I think she's a  little...psycho." She gave me a smile. "Come on. Mom and Dad are worried  about you."

And so I spent the rest of the night with Nathan's family, Eloise  occasionally holding my hand, Mr. Coburn making sure I had enough to  eat, Brooke sitting next to me at dinner, Miles climbing onto my lap.

For the last time, I was one of them, and it hurt more than I could have ever imagined.

* * *

The next day, dressed in jeans that were feeling a little tight, I went over to my in-laws' house.

"Kate! That swing! Oh, darling, it's beautiful," Eloise said. "And last  night...it was special, wasn't it? I think it was the right thing to do.  I think Nathan would've approved. We raised so much for the scholarship  fund! Someone donated more than a million dollars, can you imagine?"

"That's wonderful," I said. "Um, Eloise... I need to talk to you and Mr. Coburn."

"Hi, Kate!" Brooke was here. "How are you?"

So they'd all hear at once. Maybe it was better this way.

"Are you all right?" Brooke asked, her face changing from a smile into concern.

"I need to tell you something. All of you."

"Come, come, let's all sit. Nathan, where are you, darling? Oh, there you are."

We sat in the living room, a vast, chilly place. On the mantel was the photo Brooke had given them last night.

"We've already called a contractor," Eloise said. "We're just so excited  to start Nathan's plan for the house. It's like having a little bit of  him back, in a way."

"Good. That's...that's what I hoped. Um, listen." My heart started clacking against my ribs. "I have some news."

"What is it, dear?" Mr. Coburn asked, leaning forward.

Shit. The words I'd practiced last night evaporated. The thing I wanted  most to avoid was the idea that this baby was Nathan's. I couldn't let  them think that, even for a second, then take it away.

"Well, I... There's a friend of mine. Brooke, you met him. Daniel Breton?"

"Oh, yes. Your sister's boyfriend."

"No, he's not. Um...no, he's an old friend from Brooklyn. He actually made the swing for you."

"And we love it," Eloise said. "It's simply stunning. Please give me his address so I can write him a note."

They'd probably want to burn the swing in a few seconds. "Uh, well..." I  licked my dry lips. "The thing is, Daniel and I, we...we've been  friends for a while now. Ten years. And um...this past July, we, um...we  slept together. Once."

Eloise's smile slowly sagged. Mr. Coburn's bushy eyebrows drew together. I couldn't look at Brooke.

"And now I seem to be pregnant," I whispered.

Their silence was absolute. My hands were clenched so hard they were white.

"Wait," Brooke said. "You slept with someone three months after my  brother died? Are you kidding? Is this a joke? Because it is not funny."

I bit my lip so hard I tasted blood. Didn't say anything.         

     



 

"So my brother was barely cold and you fu-"

"Brooke, that's enough," Eloise said. She was looking at the coffee table. "Kate, I'm sorry. We'd like you to leave."

"Okay," I whispered. "I just want you to know that it wasn't planned and... I loved Nathan so much, and all I wanted was-"

"Get out," Mr. Coburn said, his voice shaking with rage. "Get out right now."

I did. My head screamed with all the months of unshed tears, and the  spike made swallowing impossible. I walked to my car like I was walking  to the gas chamber, got in and drove the half mile back to my husband's  house.

It was time to go.





Chapter Thirty-Five

Ainsley

I was supposed to go to the Coburns' anniversary party, but I had to go to the hospital instead.

My father got injured when a rookie first baseman slid into him at home  plate. Dad still made the call (out by a mile and a half) but had to go  to the ER with a broken tibia and a dislocated kneecap. Luckily, it was  at Yankee Stadium, so I met him in the Bronx and drove him home. Texted  Kate that I'd be staying with him tonight and maybe for a few days. I  also called Candy.

"Well, he's on his own," she said merrily. "We're separated. Besides, he's your father."

"And Kate's and Sean's. And Sean is a doctor," I reminded her.

"Right," she snorted. "Try getting that lunkhead to actually do  something for his parents. No, it'll be you, sweetheart. You can  practice your nursing skills. Good luck!"

"Mom doesn't care," I told my father, who grunted. It was fine.

And once I'd gotten him into his recliner, gave him a painkiller and  made him some soup, I went out to my car and brought in the pictures of  my mother that I'd been carrying around. Captive audience and all that.

"What?" he asked. "I want to watch SportsCenter."

I turned off the TV and tossed the remote control on the couch, out of reach. "Sorry, gimpy. No time like the present."

"Fine," he grumbled. "What do you want?"

I handed him the first photo, and he melted a little.

"You sure were a cute little bugger," he said. He looked at the pictures slowly. "And your mother...she was terrific."

"Can you tell me anything else about her?" I asked.

"You're a lot like her."

"In what ways?"

"I don't know, Ainsburger," he said, shifting in the chair. "In the good ways. She was... She was fantastic."

Men.

But his eyes lingered on every photo, and once in a while, he'd touch one. "Happy times," he said gruffly. "We were happy."

I wedged myself into the chair next to him and hugged him tight. "I'm sorry, Daddy."