Now or Never(19)

“Come on. Let’s get out of here.” With a scathing glare over her shoulder, Ashlyn ushered Em outside and across the icy lot.

Snow began falling like tiny white crystals, sparkling in the glow of the streetlights as the car puttered to life. Em didn’t know where they were going and she honestly didn’t care. She just needed to be away from there. From Jay. And that hurt almost more than anything.

“He was drunk, Em.” Em shot a glance at her friend who frowned back at her. “I know it’s not an excuse. It’s just . . . You know Sahara. That girl can pounce on unsuspecting prey like a damn cheetah.”

That was true. And she knew Jay, too. But the fact remained . . . “He wasn’t exactly fighting for his life back there.”

Jay had looked like he was practically in the throes of ecstasy when she’d found them. She’d never seen him like that before. Never been able to give him that.

“No. True. But he’s a guy. They sort of have this of switch that gets thrown at a certain point when—”

“I wouldn’t know.” Em hadn’t meant to let it slip, but it was all she could think. She’d done this. Practically hand fed him to Sahara. She couldn’t give him what he needed. She may never be able to. Could she really blame him for wanting it where he could get it?

The tears finally found the release they’d been denied earlier.

“Oh, Em, I didn’t mean—” Ash’s attention flickered between the hazardous road and her friend having a meltdown in the passenger seat.

“I know. But it’s true. He’s been so patient. How can I really expect—?”

“He was dunk, Em. The wolves descended and he couldn’t beat them back. End of story. It’s got nothing to do with you.” Ashlyn threw the car in park and Em blinked up at the small white farmhouse cloaked in shadows.

“What are we doing here?”

“You’re staying with me tonight, and I bet Jay shows up at work on his knees with a dozen roses tomorrow, and everything will go back to normal.”





Chapter Thirteen





Jay



Heaviness weighed down the empty hole in his chest cavity, and Jay staggered under the burden of it. What had he done? Christ, what had he done? Shock burnt off some of the drunken, lust-filled haze engulfing him, and the look in Em’s eyes flashed through his mind. The pain. The betrayal. He’d put that look there. What the hell was he thinking? Obviously, not with his head. Not the right one, anyway.

How would she ever forgive him for this? Then another thought blindsided him. Did he want her to?

Jay stumbled his way across the restaurant toward the doors under the stares of prying eyes. They could all go to hell. He needed air. Needed to get the hell out of there.

“Jay, baby, where are you—?” Sahara’s hand wrapped around his arm and it took all of the self-control he still possessed not to toss her across the room.

“Don’t. Touch. Me.” Even Sahara wasn’t dumb enough not to heed the warning in his deep growl and she took a step back.

The sting of frigid air cut straight through the worn material of his second-hand pullover when he pushed his way outside, but there wasn’t a chance he was going back for his coat. He didn’t care. It didn’t matter. Nothing mattered. Ashlyn’s car was already gone. Em was gone. And he needed to be gone. Somewhere he could get his head together.

The damn keys seemed to have doubled in size as Jay attempted to wrestle them from his pants pocket.

“Shit!” He slipped on the ice as they broke free and nearly landed on his ass. Clinging to the door handle of his truck with a white knuckled grip, Jay struggled to unlock it, a little more unsteady on his feet than the ice alone warranted.

In a desperate attempt to stabilize some of the spinning, he dropped his forehead against the stunningly cold metal, and breathed deeply. She’d come back. She’d forgive him. She’d understand. Of course she would, she was Em. But that nagging thought of should she poked at his brain like a hot needle.

She was gone. She was free of all his bullshit. Did he really want to drag her back into it?

The keys had definitely grown in size because now they refused to fit in the lock. Jay stabbed at the damn thing, silently cursing up a storm until an arm reached over his shoulder, plucking the keys from his frozen fingers.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”

“You’re the dumbest ass on the face of the earth if you think you’re getting behind the wheel of that truck right now.”

Mason was right. Jay was definitely not in any condition to drive, but he couldn’t find it in him to give a rat’s ass if he crashed and burned. He felt like he already had. It was the sluggish thought of everyone else out on the road that resigned him to follow Mason to his car and slump inside.