Night Shifts Black(30)

I deflate with a pout, afraid maybe I'm losing this round. No! I'm not losing. "I didn't say you had to dress like an investment banker, I'm just saying, would a little color or design kill you? I mean, really. It's appalling."

"She just wants us to take our shirts off," Casey teases, and I blush. I don't know why. At this point I've seen both of them almost naked, one of them actually naked, and yet still I blush. Stupid Casey and his sexy smile … gosh, sexy everything. I have to force away the extremely unhelpful memories of him in a towel.



       
         
       
        

"Whatever. You're just mad because I don't drool over you all the time like you're used to."

"No? Really," Casey challenges, moving around the island. He pulls his shirt over his head, and sure enough my mouth goes dry. I curse to myself. At least I'm not drooling.

"Not even a little interested?" he continues, taking my hand and guiding my fingers over his chest, his abs. His perfectly sculpted tattooed torso. The detailed ink reminding me of every tantalizing picture I'd made the mistake of studying in my earlier search.

I can hear Luke snickering from his seat, and struggle desperately for a witty return. Anything! Just … something!

I swallow. His warm skin feels so good beneath my fingers and I can't get our kisses out of my head. The way his hands moved over me, the way he felt beneath my own. Gosh, I want him so much that I actually hate him right now. I especially hate that he clobbered me in this debate, even if he totally cheated.

"Geez. Put your clothes on. Luke's trying to eat."

"I'm good," Luke interjects, and I glare over at him, but finally manage to pull away from Casey. I grab his shirt from the floor and sling it back at him. He captures it against his chest with that goofy grin that only increases his appeal.

"And also, I don't believe for a second that you can look like that sitting around watching TV and eating bar food, so that makes you a liar on top of everything else."

Casey laughs and mercifully slips his shirt back over his head.

"Of course not. I was kidding about the junk food and stress. Trust me, they keep us on a pretty tight leash." He pauses, and glances over at Luke. "Speaking of which, I was gonna ask if I could borrow your key and go hit the gym later."

For some reason, Luke looks to me first before nodding. "Actually, if you want, I'll just call down and have Mara get you one of your own."

I'm sure Casey's stunned expression mirrors my own, and it's everything I can do to stay calm and not tackle Luke with a gigantic hug.

"Thanks, man," Casey replies casually, but I know he must be bursting inside as well.

"Sure. Thanks for the burger."

Casey nods, and somehow we all sense the universe has shifted.



∞∞∞



Luke says he'll make the call to Mara from his room and disappears shortly afterwards for some time alone. He's had an emotionally exhausting day that jerked him all over the spectrum, so I'm not surprised. You don't shatter glass without drawing blood.

Once we're alone, I glance back at Casey who still seems in shock.

"Guess you're staying?" I say. 

"Guess so," he replies with a smile.

"What about your life? I mean, don't you have somewhere else you're supposed to be?"

He grins. "Trying to get rid of me?"

I roll my eyes. "You know I want you here. I just … I don't know. You must have a whole other life. Obligations."

"Obligations," he smirks. "Yeah. But nothing I can't do from here. Don't worry, Mom, I'll be where I need to be when I need to be there."

He sighs. "Anyway, I do have my own place, but it's nothing worth missing. I'm on the road so much I never thought there was any point in setting up roots." He pauses. "I could say the same to you."

I almost laugh. "Please. My life is literally nothing. Talk about a pointless existence."

I feel his gaze and realize I revealed more than I'd intended.

"Sorry, that didn't come out right."

He shrugs. "I don't know. Maybe it did. What does that mean? Who are you? I don't even know your last name."

I look away. "No one worth your time, believe me."

I upset him. I can see it in the way his eyes change, that constant amusement dissolving into anger.

"You do understand you're insulting me, too, when you do that?"

Not the response I was expecting. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that. I just  … I don't know. I just meant I'm no one."

He shakes his head in frustration. "What the hell does that even mean? You're no one? So am I just an idiot then to be wasting entire days and nights with 'no one'?"

My heart starts to pound. "No. That's not what I meant. Of course not."

He glares at me and curses. "No, I know what you meant. I know exactly what you meant. Your face isn't slapped all over the internet and some stupid magazine so therefore you don't count as a person in my life just because mine is. God, Callie, we basically met two days ago and I can't even imagine not having you in my life at this point. Luke didn't know you existed a month ago and now you're his best chance at survival. You're doing what no one else could! You write poetry that cut into me, and have made me laugh so much these last couple days it's actually starting to get painful." He draws in a deep breath, and I can only stare in stunned silence. "So stop with the 'I'm a nobody' bullshit and tell me who you really are!"

I bite my lip and shift in my stool, doing everything I can to sort through the explosion. There's so much there, it's so heavy, I don't know how. I cover my face with my hands and lean my elbows on the counter. He doesn't respond, he's waiting for my decision, and I suck in a deep breath. Is he proving to be my hammer?

"I'm Callie Roland, twenty-three, born and raised in Shelteron, Pennsylvania."

I finally dare to look again, and his eyes have softened. He takes the stool beside me and holds out his hand.

"Casey Barrett, twenty-five, born and raised in Houston, Texas."

"Houston?" I repeat in surprise, remembering Luke's recent journey.

He nods and gives me a sad smile. "Elena Barrett Craven was my sister."



∞∞∞



My heart stops. I stare at Casey in shock, not sure what else to do. It can't be … but it almost has to be at the same time.

"I'm sorry to just dump that on you. I thought you should know. Maybe that matters, maybe it doesn't," he says quietly.

"Of course it matters!" I cry, still shaken from the news.



       
         
       
        

He looks away. "More pieces of the puzzle, huh?"

"More insight into you," I correct, taking his hand. He glances at me, and I see that it was my turn to surprise him. "I'm so sorry, Casey," I continue, my heart breaking as I recast everything I'd understood about the situation into a new light. "And yet you stood by him? Cared for him?"

Casey stares at the floor. "We were both hurting. Maybe I thought we were standing by each other in the beginning. But I wasn't the reason for her downfall, he was. I was able to forgive myself and continue to love her after she was gone. Luke's pain was different."

I hug him then. I can't help it. I don't know how else to explain how he never ceases to amaze me.

"You're a special person, Casey Barrett," I whisper.

He laughs against my hair. "You've only known me a few days. I'll get on your nerves soon enough."

I squeeze tighter, finding that unlikely.

He pulls back and searches my face. I want him to kiss me again, but don't dare to hope lightening will strike a third time. A brief struggle flickers behind his eyes before he finally smiles and sits back.

"So does that mean I've won enough points to continue our Dead Head marathon?"

I groan. "Do we have to? Right before bed?"

He shrugs and gives me that look I'll never be able to resist.

"Fine," I concede with a sigh. "But I maintain the Power of the Mute Button."

"Deal. But no fast-forwarding."

I grunt. "Deal."



∞∞∞



I can't sleep that night. Our Dead Head binge turns out to be the least of my problems as I stare at the ceiling of the guest room. Casey took the couch, and part of me wants to wake him up just so someone else can share in my misery. But I realize that would make me an awful human being, so I manage to stay rooted under my sheets. Still, I don't know how much longer I can lie here with my riotous mind.

While thoughts of Luke pound against my skull like always, it's surprisingly Casey's face that keeps me awake tonight. I can't stop thinking about his revelation, about the number of conversations he'd had that he could have made about himself, and didn't. Here I'd been counting on him as my support, Luke's rock, and he'd had as much reason as any of us to need an anchor. He calls himself Luke's brother and I'd been assuming that was figurative.

I think back to all his warnings about me falling for Luke. No wonder he was so sensitive to that likelihood. And here I'd been annoyed with him for being intrusive. For overstepping his bounds. I was the one stomping all over his heart and mocking his fences.