New York Nights (Heart of the City #2)(34)

Seamus puffed out his chest, pride filling him as he smiled broadly. 'Mum and bub are both doing fine.'

All gloom left me as my heart swelled for him. 'Congratulations! Boy or girl?'

'A beautiful girl, just like her mother,' he said, gesturing for me to follow him, to a nearby doorway. 'Well, almost like her mother.' He spoke out of the corner of his mouth as if parting with a secret as he pushed through the door, and I saw exactly what he meant. Nestled in Nikki's arms was a sweet, tiny bundle wrapped in white, sleeping peacefully, with her pink, wrinkly face and a full head of gingerred hair.

Nikki laughed when she saw me approach. 'I swear if a hairy baby gives you heartburn during pregnancy, then fire-red hair must burn even hotter. It all makes sense now.' She smiled, stroking her daughter's mop lovingly. Then she glanced at her husband, taking his seat beside her.

'She's so beautiful, guys. Have you got a name?' 

'Well, we did ask the boys, but we didn't think Dora or Pugsley were a good fit, so we just went with what we wanted.'

I laughed. 'Oh?'

'Sarah, meet Hermione "no middle name" Fitzgerald,' Nikki said.

'Nice to meet you, Hermione,' I said, thinking how incredibly likeable this family was, and how loved they were by all, if the sea of flowers and the odd balloon collection was anything to go by. There was scarcely a spare surface in the room, no mean feat seeing as Hermione wasn't even seventy-two hours old. I wondered which one had been brought by Ben, who by now was long gone. I wanted to ask if he had visited but I didn't want to ruin the mood, until I made the mistake of admiring a beautiful bouquet of orchids.

Dearest Nikki, Seamus, Daniel, Alec, Josh and Taylor.

With warm wishes and much love to you all on the safe arrival of beautiful Hermione.

Love always, Aunty Holly xo

The colour drained from my face. I didn't know where Alistair's girlfriend fit in all of this; inappropriately embracing Ben and crying on his shoulder, and apparently still friends with Nikki. My mind was running at a hundred miles an hour; was there more to the fallout between the brothers? Ben had been so angry with Alistair. Was it because Ben was in love with Holly? Had he just used me to try to forget her?

I just wanted to return to the Village, pack my things and leave and never look back, and I was just about to do that when Nikki spoke.

'Sarah, are you all right? You look like you've seen a ghost.' She half-laughed.

I turned to her, my face cast in sadness, because, unlike the Worthingtons, I wasn't an expert at locking away my feelings.

'I'm leaving New York, Nikki, coming here was a mistake.' The biggest mistake of my life.

'Leaving? But why?' Nikki was dismayed.

'Does anyone want a drink of water?' Seamus asked, getting up to make an exit.

'Oh, sit down, Seamus, there is only so much water a man can possibly ingest,' Nikki scolded quietly, careful not to wake the baby. Her attention turned back to me. 'Is it Mother? Ben? Christ, I knew I should have spoken to him earlier, I could just kick myself sometimes.'

'Well, you've had other things on your mind, love,' Seamus said, tilting his head at Hermione.

Nikki wouldn't have it. 'I should have done more. Sarah, I'm so sorry, you deserve a bloody medal. Emily didn't have something to do with this, did she?'

I scoffed. Emily was the least of it. The problem ran far deeper than any judgemental look from Emily or her mother.

'Alistair, actually,' I said, watching with interest as the blood drained from Nikki's face.

Seamus straightened in his chair, his eyes moving from Nikki to me. 'Now I really need a drink,' he said, leaving the room, quite possibly in search of something stronger than what was to be had from the water cooler.

Now I couldn't let it go. As much as I had no intention of bringing my troubles to the hospital, to the happy new parents, Nikki had asked, and I had answered, and now I was more worried than ever.

'Looks like you're the one who's seen a ghost, Nikki.'

Nikki shook her head. 'How much do you know?'

I sat in the seat Seamus had vacated. 'I know Alistair was driving the day Caroline died.'

Nikki nodded sombrely, adjusting Hermione as if to make her more secure.

'Who is Holly?' I couldn't help myself, maybe because I was sitting opposite the big white orchids.

Nikki looked at me for a long time before speaking. 'Well, I'm glad you're sitting down,' she said, placing Hermione into the little hospital crib next to her. 'I should probably start this off with a "once upon a time", isn't that the way most fairytales begin?' She smiled, but there was a sadness in her eyes as she looked down at her daughter. 'I'm glad Seamus isn't here, the last thing I want to do is remind him of how seriously screwed up my family is. I honestly feel like I struck gold with him, and that we managed to build our own little world over the bridge away from the crazies.'



       
         
       
        

'That's what Ben said he was trying to do in the Village: he wanted to build a new world there, a new life for Grace, until I shattered that illusion for him.'

A crease furrowed Nikki's forehead. 'How?'

'I let Alistair into the house.'

I had wanted her to roll her eyes, say how preposterous it was and agree with me that Ben had to forgive his brother. So when her face grew solemn, I began to worry.

'You let Alistair into Ben's house?'

'Just briefly, he didn't want me to say that we had met because he wanted to surprise him,' I added quickly.

Nikki looked furious. 'I bet he did,' she bit out.

'Ben really blames Alistair for Caroline's death, doesn't he? I have never seen him so mad.' I swallowed. 'Is it also something to do with Holly?'

Nikki straightened the blankets on her bed, as she sighed wearily, her limp, ash-blonde hair highlighting the circles under her eyes. 'Once upon a time, there was a girl called Holly.'

I sat up straight.

'Holly was madly in love with Alistair, and he was madly in love with her. Alistair was the youngest and wildest of all the Worthingtons, so finding someone as nice and sensible as Holly was somewhat of a win for our family. No more embarrassing headlines and scandals, because Alistair was under the thumb. Oh, how Mother rejoiced  –  we all did. We could stop worrying and we did, for a while.' She looked out the hospital window, thinking back to those days.

'Then something happened that had you worrying again?' I was sitting on the edge of my seat, my heart pounding against my ribcage as I waited for what I had already suspected, that Ben had come between Alistair and Holly. It was all so clear to me now, and I felt stupid for not seeing it before. Alistair had returned to mend fences with his brother and Holly but Ben was stuck in the past. I could feel an old anger rising in me.

'Well, so begins another story,' said Nikki, sitting back against her pillows. 'Once upon a time there was a girl called Caroline. She was beautiful, and smart and she loved Ben and he loved her.'

I knew how this story ended, but I let her continue.

'But sometimes love isn't enough, and Caroline became distant and cold toward Ben. We worried for them, but thought if anyone could work it out, they could. And then of course the ultimate blessing came. Caroline fell pregnant, she was going to bring a beautiful little Worthington into the world. And she did, born with a mop of black hair and her father's eyes. Grace was a Worthington through and through. There was such love for her, you could see it in the way Caroline looked at her daughter when she held her in her arms. You would never have suspected, and we didn't  –  until that day.' 

'That day? As in the day she died?'

'The day Holly found the letter from Caroline,' Nikki said.

I sat so immobile, barely breathing.

'Holly was on our doorstep, hysterical. Seamus and I couldn't make sense of what she was saying, she was so upset. I remember Seamus reading over it, the way he glanced at me, like his first instinct was to protect me, but then he turned to Holly to ask her if Ben knew.'

My heart sank. 'Knew what?'

'The truth.'

'She didn't want to have a baby with Ben?'

Nikki shook her head. 'She didn't want to have a baby with Alistair.'

I shook my head, my eyes wide, disbelief flowing through my very being. I had misheard her, of course I had.

'That can't be, Grace has Ben's eyes, she's his daughter.'

Nikki began to tear up as she shook her head. 'They're Worthington eyes, Sarah, but they don't belong to Ben. Holly found the letter in Alastair's pocket.'

A stray tear ran down my cheek as the horror and realisation washed over me. 'Does Ben know?'

'Holly showed Ben the letter first.'

'What did it say?'

'As much as I hated her, it didn't seem real. Caroline was such a confident, together person, but on the page, her writing was so desperate, so needy. Begging Alistair not to tell anyone about their affair, that she stood to lose everything if people suspected the baby wasn't Ben's.'

'Oh my God.'

'Grace was born, and although it was certain she wasn't his, Ben refused a paternity test. He cared for her as if she were his own, loved her despite the truth. How hard it must be to look into her eyes knowing of such a betrayal.'

'And Alistair?'

'He promised to stay away, that the affair was over and that he wasn't ready to be a father.'

'But it wasn't over, was it?

Nikki shook her head. 'The day of the accident, Alistair was driving Caroline back to the Village, but they never made it. Ben had to deal with the loss of what he believed was his daughter, the loss of a wife and the loss of a brother. You can't imagine how many times a man could be broken, be betrayed by the people who were supposed to love him. It was cruel enough losing Caroline, but to know that it happened while they were still going behind his back, even after all the pain he went through when he found out about Grace. Well, you can imagine.'