More Than I Wanted(53)

Austin was my heart and soul, and lying beside him I realized that he was more than I ever wanted. He made me feel complete, special, and loved. How we ended up here together was beyond me, he seemed so out of my league. He was handsome, smart, and funny. When Austin walked into a room, all the women turned and looked at him. He had charisma and presence, and he was above all in love with me, simply amazing.

“Do you want to go over and meet Amber?” I asked, knowing he hadn’t seen Heather and Scott’s daughter yet. I was so excited for him to meet her. He’d only seen pictures of our friend’s child at this point, and she was so much sweeter in person.

“Can we wait on that? There will be plenty of time. To be honest, I just want to see you right now; I’m not really ready to see everyone else.”

“Of course, I just didn’t want to hog all your time.”

“Take it all,” he said, pulling me close. “Truth be told, I just don’t feel very social yet. It takes a little time. I only want to be with you. Is that a problem?”

“You’ll get no complaints from me,” I grinned. “I stocked up on snacks, beer, water, whatever you should need, and we can always order pizza. We could stay cocooned in here for a solid week for all I care.”

“That sounds great,” he said nuzzling into my neck.

We spend the entire day in bed, only getting up long enough to grab pretzels and beer.

The following morning, he wanted to take me around to the jewelry store to pick out a ring. It felt funny going with him, but I was secretly glad I got some say. I’m not a fan of square cut diamonds, so I could sway him towards a round, princess cut.

After looking at rings, we settled on a diamond solitaire with a platinum band. It would have to be sized, so he would come back to pick it up in a few days. It was gorgeous, absolutely gorgeous. It seemed surreal to be ring shopping with Austin. I couldn’t believe this was actually happening. It was a lot to take in. I still hadn’t told my parents he’d proposed. I’d call them after he left.

As we walked back out to the car hand in hand, an old truck a few car lengths away backfired, and with one quick move he shoved me down, shielding me. Austin was over me as I hit the pavement, covering my body. Holy cow, what was that?

“Are you okay?” His heart was racing, his breathing hard, and he was awash in panic. Suddenly he realized where we were. I couldn’t tell if he was upset or embarrassed, but the reality that it happened was in the air between us. While it happened fast, the seconds after felt like slow motion.

I was stunned, lying under him on the pavement. I didn’t know what to say or do. It hurt hitting the pavement that hard, but I realized it was an automatic reaction for him. He didn’t do it to hurt me, he did it to protect me…he threw his body over me to save me. But save me from what… a car? His instinct was to save me, I should be grateful – but I was more concerned by his reaction.

“I’m sorry,” he jumped up, helping me up. “I’m so sorry,” he shoved his hands in his pockets. “Are you okay?”

I nodded, “Are you?” I was seriously concerned. I completely understood he’d come from a war environment with gunfire and explosions, but now that he was back, how long would he be like this?

“Yeah, I guess I’m still a little tense,” he admitted. “It sounded like,” he shook his head, “never mind.”

“You’re home now, hon. It’s safe here,” I squeezed his hand, and together we got in the car. “Do you want to talk about it? Maybe you could talk to Scott or Jake.”

“No, there’s nothing to talk about,” he said, almost angry that I asked.

I was taken back by the quick change in personality, but wrote it off. He’d been through a lot, and I needed to allow him the time to heal. I didn’t say much on the drive home. It was weird to jump from being so ecstatic over picking out a ring, to being on the ground with him, realizing he thought shots were being fired, and then driving in the car in near silence.

Nearing our house and in the driveway, I tried to soften the mood, not wanting to stay in this tense state all day. “The ring is beautiful,” I started. “I can’t believe you asked me to be your wife.”

“Do you still want to be?” He asked, almost hurt, and embarrassed I saw that.

“Why would you ask that? Of course I do!” Okay, I couldn’t avoid it, “Austin, what happened back there, I’m sure it’s a natural reaction, it just took me by surprise.”

“I’d rather not discuss it,” he said.