Misbehaving(76)

She was smiling triumphantly. “I’m impressed. It’s been years since a girl affected Garrison on her tryout. Bravo. Let’s go to my office and get your paperwork and your work schedule filled out.”

I followed her out into the hall.

Loud moaning and banging filled the hallway as we walked down it. I glanced over at a door we passed, and I had no doubt in my mind someone was having sex. Did some of the girls do that, too? I wasn’t okay with that. I was a look-not-touch only. I needed to make sure they understood that.

“I told you that you got him worked up. Good thing Farrah was here to help him burn off some steam,” Dee said, opening a door for me to follow.

I glanced back at the room as a loud male groan echoed off the walls. “That’s Garrison?” I asked, making sure I had heard her right.

“Yes. You had him sweating and shaking when he walked out of that room. He grabbed the first girl he knew would fuck him and dragged her into his office. No worries, though—he only fucks the ones who want him. He won’t touch you.”

The sick knot I lived with these days was back. This was terrifying. My world was changing, and I realized my desire to feel safe was a childhood fantasy. This was my life.

JASON

Even if I never spoke to Jess again, I needed to get revenge. I wanted to hurt her as much as she’d hurt me. The more I thought about her pushing this off on me like I deserved it only made me angrier. It was like she had laid down a fucking ultimatum that I had failed by saying I was taking Jo to that stupid cotillion. I didn’t like being controlled. My parents had been trying to control me my entire life. All I ever did was fight to be free. Jess had been one more person wanting control of me.

I had been so damn willing to give it to her too. In a way I had. I’d let her break me. Falling in love wasn’t something I had ever wanted. The only thing I had on my side was the fact that I had never told her I loved her. She didn’t know she’d hurt me as badly as she had. My pride was still somewhat intact. Not that it did me much good.

After planning on taking Jo back to my place for sex once the cotillion was over, I had failed miserably when the time actually came. I couldn’t stand to touch her. Kissing her had been bad. It lacked more than I could possibly label. She had felt wrong in my arms. She hadn’t fit right. Her curves didn’t send my heart into a wild frenzy, and the idea of getting her underneath me did nothing for me.

I had taken her home and gone back to my apartment to drink myself to sleep. Jo called the next day and the next. By kissing her, I had led her to believe I was attracted to her. How the hell she thought that after the kiss we shared, I wasn’t sure. Had she not been there for that kiss? It had been bland and boring. I focused on ignoring her at school and sending her calls to voice mail, but she wasn’t giving up that easily.

Two weeks later Winston was standing outside the door to my apartment when I got home from class. Winston was one of Jax’s bodyguards and had been with Jax since the beginning of his fame. I didn’t even look at him when I went to the door. “Good afternoon, Mr. Jason,” Winston said politely. It wasn’t his fault my brother was in there, nor was it his fault my brother paid for the apartment. I nodded. “Hello, Winston,” I replied, and stepped inside.

Jax was standing at the tall windows overlooking the small city with a soda in his hand. He turned to look at me and smirked. “You aren’t answering my calls. What did you expect?” he said.

I threw my books on the table. “I don’t know, maybe some fucking privacy,” I replied, annoyed.

Jax let out a low whistle. “Your language has taken a downward spiral.”

My brother’s witty comments were only making me more pissed off that he was here without asking.

“I’m not in the mood to talk. To anyone,” I snapped.

Jax nodded and walked over to sit on the bar stool closest to him. “Is it Mother? I heard her basically planning your wedding to Jo.”

“She can forget that shit. Jo needs to sniff elsewhere.”

“You took her to the cotillion,” Jax said as he studied me for a reaction. I knew what he was doing. He had always tried to figure me out by reading my facial expressions. Most of the time he was accurate.

“Meant nothing. I did what I said I’d do, and now I’m done.”

“You end it with Jess?” he asked, and I felt my entire body tense up at the sound of her name. I hadn’t said it or heard it in three weeks. And I wasn’t ready to hear it now.

“Don’t,” I said, walking away from him and across the room in case I started throwing things. She was already alive in my dreams at night. Haunting me. Driving me crazy. I didn’t want to acknowledge her existence while I was awake.