Love and History(24)
“My skin is crawling just thinking about what you went through. So awful.” She took a long drink of her soda to get that nasty taste out of her mouth.
“I agree. The Dom who took her on was dark and fed her needs. It took me a while to even get back to being a Dom. I ended up getting the job here so I had a fresh start. I couldn’t go to clubs though.” He leaned his elbows on the table. “Now that I’ve ruined your appetite, I’m guessing you don’t want dessert?”
“I’m good for now. I don’t blame you for moving. I broke it off with many Doms because of what they wanted. Wanting me to call them ‘Daddy’ was a clear sign we weren’t compatible.” She wiped her mouth. “I’m sorry she hurt you, but we’re not all like that.”
“I know now. You are what I need. Between my parents and that first real relationship, I decided it was easier to enjoy some Dom/sub play without the relationship.”
“And now?” she asked.
He walked around to her and leaned down. “Now, I see that I was waiting for you. And you were right here all along. If I’d gone to one pizza party with that BSDM fetish group and actually spent time online reading your posts, I’d have found you a lot sooner. I’ve only got myself to blame.”
“Good start.” She leaned back and looked up at him.
“I’m sorry I wasn’t clear about my relationship issues. If anyone can handle me as a boyfriend, it’s you.” He kissed her.
“Very nice. So you’re over your Daddy’s girl?” she asked.
He chuckled. “Totally. Now, you know all my crap. There’s nothing else shocking or weird. But there is one thing I need to know about you.”
“Me? You know my stuff.” She shrugged.
“Who choked you?” he asked.
“What? No one. I just don’t like it. The idea terrifies me. People fear drowning or heights. It’s not always a sexual trauma.”
“Why? Did a Dom hold his hand over your mouth? Take you underwater? Something happened? Screaming against a ball gag turns on most subs I’ve seen. You even react to talk about it. That’s not a generic phobia.”
“Are you sure you don’t miss the clubs?” She wrapped her arms around his neck.
“Not a bit. I went there to learn. Once I had the experience, I wanted out of there. She loved everyone watching.” He shuddered. “I’m sorry, but this is what I’m looking for. You. Still you’ve got a choking or drowning phobia. Spill it.”
The memory flooded back, and she started laughing. “It’s so dumb I never even realized it was that big of a deal. You paid really close attention to me.”
“I’m a brilliant Dom. Nothing that’s scary is dumb. Tell me.” He hugged her.
“I was ten. My older brothers were being typical teenagers and seeing who could stuff the most maraschino cherries in their mouth. I loved those cherries so I shoved six in my mouth, and they were teasing me, making me laugh. I inhaled, and one went right down my throat whole. I coughed and coughed. They slapped me on the back and everything. I didn’t even need the Heimlich, but it scared me good. I never stuffed my face again with anything. My grandmother was so proud of my ladylike bites.”
He wasn’t laughing. “I’m going to ask your brothers about that when I meet them.”
The hope fluttered inside her. He’d gone fast from not being the boyfriend to meeting the family. “Okay, they’ll tell you they didn’t put me up to it. I was being the pesky little sister, and it was my own fault.”
He kissed her. “I’ll never gag you.”
“I’ve had the generic cloth gags but they didn’t turn me on. I’m so focused on getting enough air that it doesn’t add to my fun at all. Logically, I know I can breathe, but anything blocking my mouth makes me work harder at breathing than obeying.” She kissed him. “Can we please do some kinky fun to erase that creepy abusive daddy stuff from my mind?”
“In a minute. I know we’ve only been dating a short time.”
“That’s an improvement. Now, we’re dating?” she asked.
He squeezed her tight. “Maybe it felt too right, too easy. You scared the hell out of me. No woman has done that before. Not my high school girlfriend who was overly possessive. Or even that first sub—she made me sad but I was relieved when she moved on. Nothing was ever like this. I knew if I got too attached to you, I’d be in trouble because if I lost you, I’d freak out.”
“You won’t lose me, ever. We can get as attached as we want, but you do have to take me out on dates and come to at least one of the BSDM fetish group pizza nights.” She smiled. “You know, to claim your territory.”