[Legacy of the Jedi] - 02(31)

“I know,” Qui-Gon said. “Many of us feel this. The Senate is becoming more fractured every day. Groups like the Corporate Alliance are becoming more bold in their trickery. I have visions of a day when we are no longer peacekeepers, but warriors.”

Adi looked troubled. “Visions come and go.”

“This one remains.”

“I hope you are wrong.”

“No more than I do.” Qui-Gon’s gaze rested on Obi-Wan and Siri. “No more than I do.”

Taly’s eyes grew huge as the Senate buildings came into view. “I knew it was supposed to be big. But this. it’s beautiful. And how can you get anywhere in these space lanes? Everything is so crowded.”

“You learn your way around,” Obi-Wan said. “Here’s the landing platform.”

The pilot guided the cruiser to a smooth landing. Taly looked back with regret at the luxurious interior of the ship. “This is probably the most amazing ship I’ll ever ride on.”

“Somehow I doubt that,” Qui-Gon said.

They personally escorted Taly to the meeting with the Senate committee. They watched him walk inside. He hid his nervousness well.

“I hope he tells everything he knows,” Adi said.

With a glance at Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon said, “No one tells everything they know.”

Back at the Temple, the Jedi split up to return to their quarters to rest. Qui-Gon beckoned to Obi-Wan.

“Let’s take a walk,” he said. He saw the puzzlement on Obi-Wan’s face. A walk after a hard mission and no sleep for three days? Obi-Wan’s exhaustion was evident, but he turned without a word and fell into step beside Qui-Gon.

Qui-Gon led him to the Room of the Thousand Fountains, the place where they had always had their most significant talks. The cooling spray revived them as they walked silently along the twisting paths.

“A hard mission for you,” he said. “You must have thought the worst when you were aboard that ship.”

“We did not expect to survive,” Obi-Wan admitted.

“And how did that make you feel?”

Obi-Wan shook his head. “It made me feel many things. Fear, of course. And regret.”

“Regret?”

“Regret for things not yet done,” Obi-Wan said. “Regret for not recognizing earlier… not being able to have…” He struggled and fell silent.

“Siri,” Qui-Gon said.

Obi-Wan stopped. “You know?”

“I saw it between you.” Qui-Gon began to walk again, and Obi-Wan moved next to him. “It happens sometimes, between Padawans. Especially during extreme situations - “

Obi-Wan stopped again, and Qui-Gon saw that he was angry.

“Don’t,” the apprentice said. “I realize what I am about to hear from you. But don’t diminish it.”

He spoke like a man. He is a man, you fool, Qui-Gon told himself. And he is right. Who are you to reduce his love?

“I’m sorry, Obi-Wan,” Qui-Gon said. “Come, let’s keep walking. So, you know what I’m going to say, do you?”

“That attachment is forbidden. That I have chosen this path, and I must walk it. That there is no place for such personal commitment in the Jedi Order. That each of us must be free of personal attachment or we cannot do the work we are meant to do. That a Force connection is a gift that we must honor not only in our hearts, but in our choices.”

“You say these things as if they have no meaning.”

“Sometimes everything falls away when you realize that you love.”

And what could Qui-Gon respond to that except to say I know?

“We have been together for many years, Padawan,” Qui-Gon said instead. “I think we have earned each other’s trust and respect. It wounds me that you don’t want my advice on such an important matter.”

There was a struggle on Obi-Wan’s face. “I don’t want your advice because it will break my heart not to follow it,” he said finally.

“So you will not ask for it.”

“Of course I want to hear what you think, Master,” Obi-Wan said finally. “I don’t want to wound you. Yet it seems inevitable that someone will get hurt.”

“Ah,” Qui-Gon said. “And there is your first lesson on why love is forbidden between the Jedi.”

Obi-Wan said nothing. There was just the whisper of footsteps and the soft calming splash of the fountains.

“I advise you to give her up,” Qui-Gon said as gently as he could. “This is based not so much on the rules of the Jedi, but from what I know of you. Of both of you. Obi-Wan, you are a gifted Jedi. The path is one that is ingrained on your heart. On your character. If you give it up, something in you would die. I feel the same about Siri.”