Infinity(88)

I walk the fifty yards to the house, listening to the leaves crunch under my feet. When I’m just about to the wrap-around porch, I’m almost taken down by our psychotic love monster, Pancho the Destructicon. My dog and I are as thick as thieves, but when the rest of the family is in the house he doesn’t leave his post. We’ve chatted. We’re boys. He watches out for the gang while I’m gone.

Pancho and I have a late-night ritual that Charlie doesn’t know about. Us boys like to pee against one of our favorite trees. It’s an old oak tree that is not close enough to the lake to house a rope swing over the water, but it’s a damn fine tree. In fact, I’ve thought about building a playhouse around it for the kids. Pancho hikes his leg, and I drop my shorts enough to get my dick out.

About midstream, I hear in her know-it-all voice, “I’ve always wondered why you don’t go to the bathroom before you come to bed.”

I look down at Pancho and whisper, “Busted.”

She continues, “Is this why I can’t get the boys to use our indoor plumbing? Because I don’t approve if it is. Nature is not your toilet. In fact, we have five bathrooms inside that you can choose from. It’s unsanitary…”

“I got it. You don’t want me pissing outside. Noted.” I look down at Pancho, and he looks up at me with these huge brown eyes, clearly expressing the regret he feels for the situation that I’ve gotten us in to.

I fix my shorts, and Pancho and I walk up to the porch, stepping up to where my lovely wife stands in one of my old T-shirts that hits her about mid-thigh, her caramel-colored hair twisted into a half ponytail, face clean of all makeup, and a smirk that says that I’m never going to live this down.

“You look deliciously fuckable,” I coo into her ear, hoping that I can use her body as a distraction from my anxiety. I wrap her into my arms and kiss her hair. “I love you, even when you’re being an uptight, condescending shrew.”

She drops her chin and even in the dark of the night, only lit by moonlight and stars, I can see her mind spinning. She looks up at me and bats her eyelashes. “I love you, even when you’re being a disgusting male pig.”

I pull back and slap her ass. And then I quote one of our favorite movies that we recently watched. “Take me to bed, or lose me forever.”

She throws her head back and laughs. “Show me the way home, honey.”

With that, I take her hand, pulling her into a dance position. She giggles. “It’s rude to just assume that a lady wants to dance with you.”

I nibble on the shell of her ear. “Mrs. McKinney will you do me the honor of dancing with me?”

I don’t wait for her response and begin singing “Bless the Broken Road” as I two-step us to the French doors that lead to our bedroom. Pancho runs along ahead as if he’s making sure there’s nothing keeping me from getting her right where I want her. She’s laughing like a teenage girl on prom night as I spin her around and dip her back in my arms for a soul-searing kiss. I fucking love that we’ve been together this long and still make each other happy.

Once I’ve waltzed her to our large bed, I dip her again, letting her back rest on the mattress. My T-shirt rides up to her waist revealing her long, lean, beautiful legs and white cotton panties. That’s all it takes. My cock makes note of just how much we love being inside those panties.

I shut the French doors behind me and shoo Pancho out of our bedroom, closing and locking the door. All we need is for a little face to appear next to our bed asking why Daddy is making Mommy scream. I then activate our high-tech, top of the line, cost-as-much-as –the-house security system, and then focus my full attention on Doctor Caroline Jane Collins-McKinney, who is the most perfect girl for me.

I stalk toward her, doing a pathetic attempt at a striptease that makes her lavender eyes dance with mirth as she grazes over my physique. I throw my green T-shirt on the floor and run my hand over my abs, and then strike a muscle-man pose.

She scoots further back on the bed and pushes up against the cerulean-blue padded headboard. She hits the bed as if inviting me up. Hell no! I’m having fun.

I turn around and face my back to her while I tease, removing my black athletic shorts. I take them halfway down and bring them right back up as I hear her laugh. “You want the full package, baby? I need to hear you.”

She lets out a whoop and holler that make me smile like a big dopey idiot. I drop my shorts again, showing her my half-moon and wait for more excitement from my girl.

“Colin, bring that fine behind and unwiped dick to me right this instant.” She laughs.