Inevitable(34)

“Revenge only gets you so far. Killing John didn’t make me feel any better, Bree. It’s a temporary feeling really. It’s a false sense that maybe—just maybe, it will make you feel better to get even. Maybe it will bring back the person you lost—but it doesn’t. It makes you feel worse because you inflicted the same type of pain on someone else. Yes, John deserved to die, but not by my hands.”

“Death was still yapping at his footsteps, you just helped him along.”

“Stop this. This isn’t you. Don’t let this shit consume you. Deal with it.”

“I hate you. I hate everyone. I can’t handle this!” she barked, her chest rumbling with my own.

“You hate me?” I questioned.

“Yes, I hate you,” she roared.

“Good,” I said, pressing my lips against her firmly. She bit at them so hard I could feel the skin break. Blood seeped out of the wound and onto both our lips, but I didn’t care. I still wanted her. I wanted her to feel something more than what she was experiencing.

Her fists turned into grabby hands real fast as she pawed at my shirt.

“You want my cock? You want to take your frustrations out on me? Then show me, tell me what you want, Piccolo…” I purred against her skin. She whimpered, turning her face away from mine.

“Make me forget,” she begged. Make her forget? There was no forgetting. She needed to know it.

“There is no forgetting, Bree. It is dealing and then not dealing. I refuse to allow you not to deal—so you will deal.” Licking away the salty tears from her cheek, I smirked.

“But I can make you remember. I can make you remember why you’re alive. I can make you heal. I can bring you to the crossroads, Bree, but you have to be the one to walk across.”

“You hurt me, you fucking broke me. You think John was a monster, but you’re no better. You hit me just like he hit my mother. If anything, you’re the same.” She sneered. Fuck! She was right, I was no better a person than John, but I loved her. I loved her with my whole heart and the difference was John had used her. I hadn’t. I never would.

“You have to know I never meant to hurt you. I’m sorry, Bree. I am so fucking sorry! Do you think I will forget? Because I won't. I will never forget the night in the cabin... never forget how I hurt the one person who saved my life. I fucked up. I was lost inside my head only wanting revenge." My mind drifted back to Mack… I would paint the motherfucking walls with his blood when I was done making him pay.

"I thought the one person I had finally fallen in love with betrayed me and I was hurt. All I saw was red and Mack... Mack sounded so fucking believable. I hate myself more than I have ever hated anyone for touching you in any other way than with love. DO you hear me? Understand me right now. I know I was a bastard for hitting you, and it will never happen again. No matter what the circumstance, I will never lay a hand on you again, Bree."

Her eyes told me she didn’t believe me, but her body did. She melted into my hands like chocolate. She wanted me as much as I wanted her. All the shit going on between us didn’t matter nearly as much as piecing us back together.

“I can’t handle the pain anymore…” she cried out, fresh tears running down her cheeks. She was doing something other than screaming and fighting. Wrapping both my arms around her, I cradled her head against my chest, rolling us over until I held her body against my own.

“You don’t have to. You don’t have to…” I whispered into her hair, holding her together as she fell apart.

“I miss her. I miss my old life. I just want it all to go back to the way it was…” she pleaded as if I could make all her dreams come true. The truth of the matter was, I couldn’t fix what had already been done, but I could make the future better than the past had been.

“I promise to take care of you, to make sure all your needs are met. I will make it all worth it, just stay with me. Hold onto who you are. Please.”

This is who we both were and it had never been shown to anyone. The rawest of all raw.

Kiss by kiss, I placed her back together. Our clothes were discarded, and as I mapped out every inch of her body, I could feel myself falling deeper and deeper into the hole with her.

I had never been a man of love, but I wanted her to love me, and me to love her—more than I wanted anything in the world.

“You’re my everything,” I said peering deeply into her eyes as I rocked into her. Sweat covered both our foreheads, and as I pushed back the hair sticking to her forehead, I knew she knew.

“I know,” she cried out in shallow breaths. Our bodies were connected in ways they never had been before. It wasn’t just about fucking anymore. It was making someone feel and see you for all you were. It was about emotions, and expressing them in the form of your body.