Her Forgotten Betrayal(71)

He lowered his forehead to hers, flooding her with a sweet connection that felt young and innocent, like they were both starting over every time they touched this way.

“You’re not going to hurt me,” she said, believing it. “As risky as this plan sounds, I know what I’m getting into this time. You’ve made that possible. Even if the rest of what we thought we could become again doesn’t happen, I’ll always be grateful for what you’ve done for me.”

His attention dropped to her lips.

She licked them and watched his pupils expand at the sight. She sensed the need escaping his rigid control, matching her own desire for one last taste of what they’d shared.

“I don’t want your damn gratitude, Shaw,” he whispered.

The words rasped across her already frazzled nerves.

”What do you want?” she asked, desperate for it to still be her.

But only if he could keep believing in them, no matter how messy and imperfect and impossible being together might become. She wanted to hear him say the same forever things he had when they’d made love. But only if he was really going to stay for good this time, long after the last of their business together was over. And she didn’t know if she could even believe promises like that from him again. So she kissed him instead. Her mouth closed over his, demanding, craving him.

She was suddenly more terrified of letting this moment go than she was of her stalker. Cole made her need in ways no one else ever would. Even if it was for the last time, she wanted the rush of him holding her body tight, until there was no longer any her, any him. There was only them.

The intimacy of it, of this one reckless kiss, might haunt her forever, but she wasn’t giving it up.

“Cole…,” she murmured against his lips.

“Damn it.” He growled as he took over the kiss, flooding her with his own desire, overwhelming her and challenging her, driving her to be strong and weak and dependent and demanding. “I don’t want to hurt you anymore, Shaw. Are you sure you want this?”

“Don’t stop,” she said, knowing she might regret her choice later, when she was once again safe, but alone. “Please, kiss me.”

…

“Shaw,” Cole said, as he took her mouth again.

Everything.

He put everything into the feel of her lips beneath his. She was alive in his embrace, craving him while he sated himself in the feel of her. She was every decent moment of his past, come to life one last time like a promise in his arms. And he had to let her go. He had to stay focused on what they had to do next.

“I’m sorry, too,” he whispered against her temple, her neck, the delicate skin along the underside of her jaw. “I know I’ve made this impossible, and that you need more time to figure out what you want…”

“But we have a job to do.” Her fingers clenched in his hair, bringing his head up until he was drowning in the determined smile she gave him. It didn’t quite mask the pain and confusion still swirling in her gaze. “So, let’s get down to business.”

He kissed her, gently this time. It was a good-bye kiss, quite possibly, if they didn’t find some way at the end of this to hold onto what he’d once been so determined to walk away from. The tear trickling down her cheek told him she knew it, too.

“We don’t have much time,” he said.

She nodded, launching into a hug that took away the hurt for the few seconds he held her. Then she was gone. From the coffee table, she picked up the wireless digital recording device he’d shown her while they’d discussed their plans.

“How do I wear this?” she asked.

Cole stood with the body tape he’d grabbed from his kit. “Lift the hem of your sweatshirt.”

When she did, he went to work. Keeping his touch professional, he taped the tiny unit to the Kevlar vest he’d had her strap on beneath her roomy clothes. The built-in mic would catch every word spoken within a thirty-foot radius, while its GPS tracking device kept him homed in to her location. Her shirt fell back, and that was that.

There was nothing else to do but place his next call to Dawson, then watch Shaw plunge headfirst into danger. But she’d be taking the lead. The outcome of this assignment was in her hands from now on, and she needed to know she had his complete confidence.

“You ready for this?” he asked.

“Do I have a choice?”

“You can wait him out.” Cole knew it would be a mistake, but this was her call. It always should have been. Pushing her for more than she was capable of tonight was the best way to get one or both of them killed. “It’s possible your memory will come back and you can give the U.S. Attorney enough to exonerate you without us capturing this bastard.”