Galilee Rising(88)

"I'm sorry?"

"You were the only man worth a lick who ever gave me the time of day. Why on earth did you do that?"

"Joanna…"

"No. Really. I really need to hear it."

He stares at me, hopefully seeing a lonely, desperate woman ruined by a broken heart. Once again, years of experience pay off. Glad my pain was finally good for something. "Your tenacity. Your loyalty. Your ability to think on your feet. How you never put up with people's crap, even when it costs you. How you fight with all you've got when you think the cause is worth it. Your smile. Your wild hair. That noise you make right before you…" He blushes. "You know. You're a good person, Jo. If I, of all people can say it, then know it's true. But for the life of me, I just don't know why you can't believe it."

"Because you seem to be the only man to ever see it, Harry. And I threw you away." I sit up and smile sadly. "I'm happy you found someone, my hand to God I am. You deserve every happiness in this world," I say sincerely. "I just…I don't know." I flop back against the couch again. "I miss you. I miss Justin. I miss the guys in the squad. I am…completely alone. All I have is the work now." I gaze down at my wringing hands. "Maybe that's all I'll ever have. Maybe it's all I deserve. But by God if that is the case, I'm gonna do it right. If this city and its citizens are all I got, then no matter what, I have to do right by them. To protect them. And I will do whatever is necessary to achieve that." I pause for effect, pretending to struggle to get the next few words out. "Dr. Jonathan Ambrose."

"What about him?"

"You might want to question him about his twin brother, Jordan, and their…destructive rivalry," I say with venom. Harry's eyes narrow behind his glasses. "What you choose to do with this information is up to you. I trust you. If you feel the need to distribute what you discover from him, I will back you fully in your determinations. With documented evidence and eyewitness testimony if needed."

At first he's confused, but that only lasts a second. "Lord Nightingale."

"Yes. I shouldn't have kept it from you, but at the time my loyalty was misplaced. I've had some sense knocked into me since. I shouldn't have let emotion cloud my judgment. Consider me cloud free and completely on your side from here on. Just go talk to him. As I said, if you feel the need to release information to the press, such as a picture of Jordan Ambrose, by all means."

"Okay. Thank you."

I rise from the couch and smooth my pants. "If you have any follow-up questions, I'm here. Just don't say anything over the phone. I'm fairly sure Jordan's bugged them."

"Good to know." He stands too. "Are you sure you're going to be okay?"

"I'm fine, Harry," I say with a proper smile. "Really. I'll see you to the door." We walk out and through the long hallway, past the disapproving Pendergasts, to the front door without a word. I keep my eyes straight ahead, but Harry keeps glancing at me with trepidation. I open the front door with a gracious grin. "Thank you for coming. Really. If I learn anything else, I'll contact you. I promise. And good luck with Dr. Ambrose. Just keep at him. He's not as tough as you might think," I say with an undercurrent of scorn. "Bye."

As I shut the door, Harry says, "Joanna?"

I open it again. "Yes?"

"Look, I don't know what happened, but whatever it is…you deserve to be happy. You really do."

For whatever reason this sentiment makes me burst into a real giggle. "Oh, Harry," I say, shaking my head. "When has anyone ever gotten what they really deserved in this life?" Still laughing, I shut the door on the man I never, ever deserved.



*



With that piece of theater complete, I return to the plethora of work calls and e-mails I've neglected these past two days. It actually feels good to focus on something non-Cain related. Depressed Joanna always did throw herself into work when the going got tough. Of course I can't stop glancing at the clock as I satiate my workaholic side. I don't know if Harry will go directly to Jem or wait a day or two after he's gathered more information. He will visit, though. For all our sakes I hope it's sooner rather than later. Harry's probably really concerned about me, even kicking himself for leaving me in such an agitated state. Jem will set him right. All part of the plan.

When I'm finally done with work, a million hours later, I burn myself a frozen pizza and curl up on the sofa to watch TV. I have to be ready if he arrives tonight. Around nine-thirty, I'm about to abandon my vigil when the moving fireplace startles me. Jem, in full Lord Nightingale uniform, steps into my living room, lips twitching in anger. Ready for round two. Fight!