Friends with Benefits(16)

I had never been so broken.





Chapter 13

Steven





My dreams had been of her. We were lying on a bed that didn't belong to  either of us. The sheets were a brilliant white silk that glowed despite  the room we were in being lit only by the flickering of a single  candle.


Allie was on top of me. My hands were on her hips. She was rocking  against me gently, grinding her hips in slow circles. Her back was  arched, and she was looking up at the ceiling, showing me her slender  throat and lifting her breasts. Her long hair hung down her back like a  dark curtain, and the ends of it grazed the top of my thighs.


There was nothing to do but watch her; there was nothing else I wanted  to do. She never quickened her rhythm. She was steady and controlled,  even as she grew breathless. A song had started to play. At first, it  sounded far away. It continued to play as Allie rolled her neck and  looked down at me. She braced herself with her hands on my chest. I  closed my eyes as she slid up and down my cock. Her pussy had been so  tight, so wet, so welcoming.


I felt the insides of her thighs quiver against the outside of mine when  she came. A sweet moan fell from her parted lips, and she bowed her  head, her hair falling over her shoulders to tickle my chest. I held her  down on my cock, pushing myself into her as deeply as I could, as the  last tremors rippled through her.         

     



 


My name was on her lips. She whispered it, over and over, as I continued  to fuck her. Her head rolled back again. I reached up to cup her  breasts. They filled my empty palms as she continued to grind against  me.


Then the song grew louder, and Allie felt farther away.


She rode me harder, but I could barely feel it. She became less  tangible, and I couldn't feel her breasts in my hands anymore. It was  like I was clutching air. Desperation tickled my throat. I felt alone,  somehow, despite knowing she was there.


The song was louder again. I recognized it. It was something I heard all the time.


I woke up disoriented and rock hard to the tune of my alarm clock.  Lingering images of Allie riding me flickered behind my eyelids as I lay  in bed. I wasn't ready to leave them behind.


So I reached over to the table beside my bed, fumbled to open the  drawer, and withdrew a tube of lotion I kept on hand for such occasions.  I pumped some into my palm, then threw the blanket aside with my other  hand. I ran the lotion over my cock, the slick sensation of it nearly  too intense at the tip.


As I fisted my cock, I closed my eyes and pictured Allie lying with me  again. I thought of her milky thighs, spread wide for me as she lay on  her back upon that glowing white silk. She was rubbing herself, gentle  and steady, pausing only to hold her swollen clit between two fingers.  After a second or two, she would release and cascade back into the  circular rhythm she liked so much.


My hips twisted as my arousal heightened. I edged my fingers over the  tip of my cock, making a slippery mess out of lotion and pre-cum. A low  groan escaped me, and I focused more intently on my vision of Allie.


She was still on her back. Her eyes were heavy, and her lips were parted  as she moaned softly. She reached out with one hand, beckoning me  closer. I obliged, leaning over her, my cock settling between her thighs  and pressing up against her wet pussy. She was swollen and ready.


As I eased into her in my mind, my hips bucked. Hot lines of semen  dashed up my stomach and chest. I lay back, letting my tense muscles  settle into the comfort of the mattress. Then I grabbed tissues from the  box on the nightstand and cleaned myself up.


After, in the bathroom, my lustful thoughts of Allie were replaced by  more unsettling ones of her and Andrew. Of him filling her up. Of him  shooting his load in her. Of both of them, lying together in his bed  wrapped up around one another like snakes.


Feeling instantly angry again, I showered. The steam and hot water did nothing to ease my mind.


I couldn't help but feel a tightness in my gut. It was something I  hadn't felt in a long time-not since Kyla, at least. Betrayal. It hurt  more than I remembered. Something felt different this time. It was more  than likely because this time it was Allie who had stabbed me in the  back. The one person I believed in more than anyone had ripped my heart  in half.


I hated how dramatic I was being. I resented the hot anger and the  emotions that had been brewing inside me since reading the entry in  Allie's diary about her and Andrew fucking. Dammit. I wanted nothing  more than to bury it all and move on. I wanted to forget.


As I dried off, my anger hardened. Andrew had been twenty-two. What was  he thinking, having sex with a sixteen-year-old? When I had confronted  him the other day, he explained that it had been legal, but it had also  been a mistake nonetheless. It was one they both wanted to take back,  apparently. Andrew had tried to assure me that it was a one-time thing  that they both regretted and never did again. His words meant nothing.


What was worse was he had fucked her when she was drunk. Sixteen and  drunk. He should have known better. He should have controlled himself.  Of course, Allie was beautiful. She always had been. But she had  deserved more than that. Her first time was with someone she hadn't  loved, in a bedroom that smelled like Axe and old shin pads, on sheets  that probably hadn't been washed in four weeks.


I gritted my teeth as images of Allie on her back in that bed flashed in  my mind. Teenage Allie. Sweet, innocent, soft Allie. The Allie I had  first known. I could see Andrew above her, drunk and pathetic, trying to  stuff himself in her. Andrew had told me the other day that's not how  it had happened. Maybe he was telling the truth. Maybe it had been  better for her.


Or maybe, it hadn't.


But that wasn't the best of it all. For two full weeks, both had  believed Allie was pregnant. But they had walked around acting like  nothing had happened. I went to school with Allie. I saw her every day.  We walked home together. She had never said a single word. Not one. My  best friend lying to my face because she thought she was carrying my  older brother's baby.


It was the stuff of teenage TV shows.         

     



 


I fixed my hair and brushed my teeth. Once I was done in the bathroom, I  returned to the bedroom where I dressed in one of my best navy blue  suits, brown belt, brown dress shoes, and a cream colored shirt. I had  meetings all day with some of the investors I pitched to, and I had to  keep a cool head until I was back home.


That was going to be a struggle, especially since every time I blinked, I saw Allie and Andrew together.


I didn't always see them having sex. Sometimes I imagined them in  waiting rooms at clinics. I saw them holding hands while they waited for  the doctor to come back and tell them the pregnancy test results were  negative. I saw them embracing each other in relief, and then both  vowing to never say a word to anyone. Especially me.


These thoughts were worse than the ones of them having sex. I could  believe them if they said the act hadn't meant anything, but everything  that followed was a testimony to the simple fact that they had been  willing to commit to one another. That hurt more than the rest of it.


I plucked my watch from my dresser and tightened it on my wrist. I had  to get a grip. There were more important things for me to focus on right  now. My career, for example. These distressing thoughts of Allie and my  brother could wait. I would have plenty of time to sift through it all  over the next few days when it wasn't so fresh.


Maybe I would talk to Chance about it. He had always been good at  offering me a different perspective. And, if he failed at that, we could  spend a night on the town where I could expend my energy finding the  right girl to bury my cock in. That would be a good enough distraction  from these wandering and painful thoughts of Allie.


Perhaps I should have given my number to that spicy brunette from  Dante's. She would be able to keep my mind off Allie. I was sure of  that. She would probably let me do whatever I wanted to her.


My phone buzzed in my pocket against my thigh. I fished it out, and upon  looking down at the screen, I grimaced. Allie was calling again. I had  ignored her last few attempts to reach me, and I knew I still wasn't in  the right frame of mind to talk to her. I was angry, and it would be  easy to say things better left unsaid.


I hit the red button to end the call and slid the phone back into my pocket. She could wait. She would have to.


I sighed and made my way out the front door and to my car. The drive to  the office felt longer than usual. Every song had an association to  Allie. So I ended up turning off the radio and opted to drive in  silence.


The silence only made my own thoughts louder.





Chapter 14

Allie





I slammed my front door closed and collapsed against it. Mondays were  usually bad at the office, but today had been an exceptionally shitty  one.


James Lipton had hit on me several times and ignored my resting bitch  face that I had been trying to perfect for months in an attempt to get  him to leave me alone. I had spilled coffee on my keyboard and now had  to pay out of my paycheck to replace it-which I wasn't sure was legal or  not. In the end, I concluded that I didn't care. I'd rather fork out  the money than deal with the back and forth with James about ordering me  one in the next office supply shipment.