Footsteps(106)

Carmen dropped her hand and sat back. “Sabina, I don’t care what he wants. I care what he needs. If you want to be part of us, then don’t pussy out. We pull together. Are you family or are you not?”





“Is it not his choice?”





“Not right now. He’s in no state to make choices, clearly.” She turned to her. “If you care about Trey and Joey, and about Carlo, you stay with the other people who do. Even if it hurts. That’s family.”





She cared about all of them. She loved every member of the Pagano family, felt close to every one of them, in a way she had not been able to be close to anyone, love anyone, since she had been a teenager.





Joey…in the furor over missing Trey, the reason they were all meeting in the hospital was getting lost. Joey had been shot in the chest. After Jenny had pulled away with Trey still struggling in her arms, Sabina had forced herself to focus and commit the license plate to memory. Then she’d dropped to her knees at Joey’s shoulder. He’d been unconscious, his breath coming in fading bursts. His t-shirt had already been soaked with blood, and his perspiring skin had been far too pale. Holding his slack, clammy hand, she’d pulled her phone out of the beach tote and dialed 911.





When help was on the way, knowing that her next call had to be to Carlo, Sabina had simply broken down. She’d managed the call but not coherence. He hadn’t answered, and she couldn’t even remember what she’d said on the message. Then, needing more, needing somebody to help her, she’d called Luca.





He’d arrived before the ambulance. Kneeling with her at his brother’s unconscious body, he’d pulled the story out of her. And he had handled everything from that point. Sabina had not been strong enough.





She was not strong enough.





But she wanted to be. She needed to be.





“Sabina.” Carmen’s voice broke through her bitter reverie. “Are you here with us? Through it all?”





“Yes. Unless it causes for Carlo trouble. I don’t want to hurt him more.”





“You’re not trouble, Sabina. You’re help. He knows it. He’ll see it again. We all see it. Even Pop sees it now.”





Watching Carlo and his brothers across the room, Carlo with his mouth now bleeding, Luca jabbing him in the shoulder as he talked, Sabina wondered if he would see it—if he could ever again see her as more than the person who let an unstable woman with a gun take his son away.





All such concerns were set aside when the surgery doors opened and two doctors in green surgical scrubs came out. Sabina and all the Paganos—and the man who’d come with Carlo, who looked vaguely familiar, but whom Sabina was not sure she knew—stood. Carlo Sr. stepped forward, and the family arrayed itself with him, Luca and Carmen at either side of him, John a step behind, Uncle Ben and Uncle Lorrie and their wives at his side, Nick and Mrs. D. back from them. Sabina stayed near her chair. Carlo, too, hung back, the vaguely familiar man with him.





Sabina couldn’t hear what was being said in the cluster around the doctors, but she saw the reactions of the family. The news was not good. Carlo Sr. dropped his head, and Luca put his hand on his back. Carmen held him. The rest of the family reacted in similar ways.





Feeling a sick sense of doom, and not sure what to do, Sabina waited, glancing back and forth between the cluster of family and Carlo off to the side. She wasn’t sure whether she wanted to catch his eye or not. She feared what she might see if she did.





As the doctors led Carlo Sr. and Carmen through the doors, Luca broke away from the group and came to her, his brow etched with concern, or maybe with sorrow. He rubbed her arm, a gesture meant to calm, even reassure.





Before she faced Luca, Sabina saw the Uncles talking to Nick. Nick nodded and left.





She looked up at the man standing before her. “Luca?” She was afraid to ask a question directly.





“They don’t know. The bullet nicked some artery in his chest, and he lost a lot more blood than we even knew. His organs started to shut down.” He stared at the door through which his father and sister had gone. “They don’t know. They’re letting us back in recovery in pairs, because he could go at any time. Or he could turn it around. They’re trying to get him stable enough for the ICU. Where the fuck is Rosie?” He spun on his heel. “John—Rosie?”





John shrugged. “I’ve left messages. Should I just go to her dorm and grab her?”





“No. You need to be here in case…” Luca didn’t finish. “Fuck. Fuck!”