Fashionably Dead Down Under(97)

As she moved toward them her skimpy pole dancer outfit was replaced by flowing robes. She was exquisite. Her hair blew wildly around her head and her animals darted around her.
“So what brings you here, Mom?” Satan whispered.
“I heard there was a party. My invitation must have gotten lost in the mail.”
“Oh,” he croaked. “I think God was supposed to tell you about it.”
God shot Satan a look that was covered in ‘I’ll smite your ass later.’ “No,” he said in a voice that wasn’t nearly as melodic as it had been. “It was all Satan’s fault. He said he didn’t want you here.”
Satan tackled God and they began to pummel each other and roll all over the stage. Thankfully I had use of my feet again and was able to jump out of the way, or they’d have taken me down with them.
“Enough,” she bellowed. They froze. The entire room froze. “So, Astrid darling. Was I amazing or what?” she asked, referring to her pole debacle.
“Gigi, it was okay. You need to practice more and I think you need to cut the cussing part back by a minute or so.”
I’m sure I heard Satan and God whimper. Gigi considered me for a long moment and I wondered if my uncles knew something I didn’t . . .
“Brilliant,” she shouted and the walls rumbled. “I shall take those notes and incorporate them into my new routine. Do you see why I like her?” she demanded of her boys.
“Yes,” they muttered meekly.
“She tells me the truth. Which is more than I can say for the rest of my family.” She stomped her foot and the back wall of the dining room collapsed.
“Gigi,” I admonished. “Chill out. If you want to be invited, you can’t destroy your son’s house every time you show up. Deal?”
“Deal,” she said and pursed her pretty lips. “Would you people have me over more often if I didn’t leave such a mess?”
“Um . . . sure,” Satan said, looking to me for guidance. Even though he had fucked with me, I gave him a nod. He was a bastard, but I liked him.
“I’d be willing to host a family dinner every now and then,” God offered in a shaky voice.
“Will you come visit me in Nirvana every Tuesday?” she inquired. “I’ll cook.”
Both men sucked in a quick breath and shuddered. “Can we bring take out?” Satan asked.
She gave him the evil eye and then laughed. “Of course. I can’t cook for shit.”
“Mom, Astrid is the next True Immortal,” God told her. Satan flipped him the finger. Apparently he had wanted to spring the news.
“Tell me something I don’t know,” she cooed, letting them know that nothing got by Mother Nature. “I’ve known that since the minute the child was born. It was difficult to let her grow up the way she did, but that’s what the Fates demanded. Those gals are bitches,” she muttered and wandered over the cage. “Why are three of my granddaughters caged like animals?”
“We had some issues. They’ll be living in Purgatory for the next few years,” Satan explained.
Gigi circled the cage and the Sins trembled. “I have a better idea,” she crowed with excitement. Her robes billowed around her and her beautiful eyes lit up. “I shall take them home with me and teach them manners! Plus I need some new people to clean the monkey shit off of the furniture.”
“Um . . . ” Satan waffled.
“Excellent,” she squealed. “We shall leave immediately. Bill, are you ready?”
Grandpa ran forward and blew me a kiss as he took his true love’s arm.#p#分页标题#e#
“See ya, boys.” He grinned and winked and they disappeared. Within seconds the room was restored to its former glory and the cage was gone.
“Did that just really happen?” God asked, dazed.
“It did,” Satan said and ran his hands through his hair.
I felt Ethan’s presence beside me and all was right with my world. He kissed my temple and wrapped his arms around me.
“I must take my leave,” God said. “Astrid, it was lovely to meet you. I will assume this is your Ethan. You two have a very important job ahead.” He touched my stomach and a warm burst of loving magic spilled into me. “A very important job.” He turned to his brother and they embraced. The crowd was awed. I was awed.
God clapped his hands three times and he disappeared along with his entourage.
“Wow, people come and go so quickly here.” I giggled at my Wizard of Oz reference, but nobody got it so I shut my mouth.
“Everyone clear the room. You are dismissed,” Satan said. “Now.” The room emptied quickly except for Ethan, myself, Dixie and the Devil.