Fantasy Lover(42)
"I'll be a monster."
She looked skeptical. "I don't think you could ever be a monster."
He glared at her. "You have no idea what I'm capable of. And when the gods' madness comes upon you, you are beyond all help. All hope."
A knot settled tight in his stomach.
"You should have never summoned me, Grace." Julian reached for his drink.
"Did you ever think that maybe this was what was meant to be?" she asked suddenly. "Maybe I summoned you because I was meant to free you."
He looked across the table at Selena. "You summoned me because Selena tricked you. All she wanted was for you to have a few nights of pleasure so that you could go off and find a decent man without fear of him hurting you."
"But maybe-"
"No buts, Grace. It's not meant to be."
Grace's gaze fell down to his wrist. She reached out and touched the Greek writing that ran from his inner wrist halfway up his arm.
"How beautiful," she said. "Is it a tattoo?"
"No."
"What is it?" Grace persisted.
"Priapus burned it there," he said, avoiding the answer.
Selena sat forward and looked at it. "It says 'damned for eternity and beyond.' "
Grace closed her hand over the writing and met his gaze. "I can't imagine what you must have suffered all this time. Any more than I can understand why your own brother would do such a thing to you."
"As Cupid said, I knew better than to touch one of Priapus's virgins."
"So, why did you do it?"
"I was stupid."
Grace ground her teeth, wanting to strangle him. Why couldn't he just answer her questions? "What would make you-"
"I have no wish to discuss it," he snapped.
She released his arm. "Have you ever let anyone close to you, Julian? I bet you've always been one of those men who trusted no one near your heart. One of those guys who would rather have his tongue cut out than actually let anyone know you're anything but impervious. Were you like that with Penelope?"
Julian looked away as memories poured through him.
Memories of a childhood spent in hunger and deprivation.
Memories of nights spent in agony of… "Yes," he said simply. "I was always alone." Grace felt for him. But she couldn't let him give up.
Somehow she would find a way to reach him. To make him want to try and break the curse.
Surely there had to be some way to make him fight this.
And she vowed to find it.
Chapter 8
Julian and Grace helped Selena close down her stand and get to her Jeep before they headed home through Friday evening traffic.
"You've been quiet," Grace said as she stopped for a red light.
She watched the way his gaze followed the path of the other cars on the road. He looked so lost, like someone caught between dreams and reality.
"I don't know what to say," he responded after a brief pause.
"Tell me how you feel."
"About what?"
Grace laughed. "You are definitely a man," she said. "You know, the guys give me the hardest time during my sessions. They come in, spend one hundred and twenty-five dollars an hour to basically say nothing. I'll never figure it out."
His gaze dropped to his lap and she saw the way he rubbed his general's ring idly with his thumb. "You said you were a sex therapist. What exactly is that?"
She started back into traffic. "You and I are sort of in the same business. I help people who have relationship troubles. Women who are afraid to be intimate with men, or women who love men a little too zealously."
"Nymphomaniacs?"
She nodded.
"I've known a few of those," he said with a sigh.
"I bet you have."
"And the men?" he asked.
"They're not so easy. Like I said, they don't talk as much. I have a few cases of men who have performance anxiety-"
"What's that?"
"Something I'm sure you'll never have," she said, thinking of the arrogant way he constantly pursued her.
Clearing her throat, she explained. "They're men who are afraid their partners will laugh at them while they're in bed."
"Oh."
"I also have a couple who are verbally abusive to their spouses and girlfriends. A couple who want to have their sex changed-"
"Can they do that?" Julian asked in a shocked tone.
"Oh, yeah," she said with a wave of her hand. "You'd be amazed what the doctors today are capable of."
She turned toward her house.
Julian was quiet for so long that she was about to show him the radio when all of a sudden he asked, "Why do you want to help these people?"
"I don't know," she answered honestly. "I guess it goes back to my childhood when I was very insecure. My parents loved me, but I didn't know how to relate to other kids. My father was a history professor, and my mother a housewife-"