Exiles in America(145)

“It’s like I said,” Daniel replied. “Abbas has had some kind of nervous

breakdown.”

“It’s possible.” Zack had gone into shrink mode during the argument, and

part of him remained there. Daniel often found his psychiatrist persona a

challenge, both admirable and annoying.

E x i l e s i n A m e r i c a

3 3 1

They went into the kitchen and put the glasses in the sink, and Zack began

to wash them.

Daniel came out with it: “I hate to say this, but I think Elena is right. I

think Abbas should be hospitalized. For a week or two. Until he calms

down.”

“No. Absolutely not.” Zack didn’t even pause to consider the idea. “She

shouldn’t have mentioned it.”

“But he’s flying apart. He’s having a meltdown.”

Zack shook his head. “The man is not acting psychotic. He makes perfect

sense. Unfortunately.”

“But you heard him. He wants to take them to Iran. Which is like wanting

to go to prison. It’s totally irrational, completely self-destructive.”

“It would be a terrible decision,” Zack agreed. “But there’s nothing patho-

logical about it. He’s under a lot of strain right now. Life has become very

complicated for him. It’s only natural he’d say and want strange things.”

They remained at the sink, no longer washing glasses, just standing there,

as if sitting down would signal a long, serious talk, which neither of them

wanted.

“He threatened to kidnap Osh,” said Daniel. “If Elena doesn’t agree to

go.”

“He didn’t call it kidnapping. Elena called it kidnapping.”

“I think he could do it. He takes Osh down to the mosque in Newport

News every other day. What’s to stop him from going to the airport there, get-

ting on a plane with Osh, and skipping the country? Do you want that to hap-

pen?”

Zack was losing his patience. “Look. If Abbas were committed, he’d be

held for forty-eight hours. They’d examine him and either want to keep him

there indefinitely, which would be disastrous. Or they’d release him immedi-

ately. If he were released, he’d be sure to skip the country. So no, it’s not an

option we even want to consider.”

Which made so much sense that Daniel wanted to agree.

But then Zack said: “I respect your concern here, Daniel. But you’re not

an objective party.”

“What does that mean?”

3 3 2

C h r i s t o p h e r B r a m

“You were in love with him. Remember?” Zack attempted a tiny smile.

“You’re still infatuated. A little.”

Daniel was hurt to be so misunderstood. “You think I want him locked up

at Eastern State because I’m still in love and don’t want him to leave?”

“That’s not what I meant.”

“No? What did you mean?”

“Only that—” He waved his hand, trying to erase his words. “You know

him too well to be objective. That’s all.”

“I’m not infatuated,” Daniel declared. “Not now. I’m not sure I ever was

in love with the jerk. As soon as the sex stopped, I stopped feeling much of

anything for him. My concern here is purely selfless. I want to save him from

himself. I don’t want to save him for me. ”

Zack stared as if he’d just said something absurd. “Daniel. You are still in

love with him. Especially now that you’re not fucking.”

Daniel was stunned. “Fuck off,” he said. “No way.” He couldn’t under-

stand why he was so angry. “What do you know about it? When was the last

time you were in love? Sexually, I mean. You love everybody and nobody, and

that doesn’t count.”

Zack’s eyes grew wide, and Daniel realized he had jumped over the real

subject into something else, a bigger, messier topic. Daniel quickly jumped

back.

“I wish I were in love with him. Because that would make this sexy and

dramatic. Instead it’s just messy and ugly. I hate every minute of it. Because I

can’t do a damn thing to help him. You won’t let me. Because he’s your case

now. Not mine.”

Zack quietly said, “He’s not a case. He’s a friend. He’s my friend as well as

yours.” He swallowed. “Just because I don’t care about sex doesn’t mean my

love doesn’t count. But why should that matter to you, since you’re sure

you’re not in love with him?”

“You are so smart,” said Daniel. “So on top of things. Is that why you

won’t commit him? You want him to skip the country, so you can get him out