Devlin UnLeashed(59)

“Shut the fuck up!”

“Why should I? I’m the one who wakes you at night. I’m the one who gives you everything you need. It’s always been me, Devlin.” She pointed at her chest. “But still you call out to her when we make love.”

“Make love?” I snorted with an indifferent smile on my face. “We fuck, Jess. It’s all we’ve had for years. Before she even came in the picture. And let’s not pretend you’re some kind of angel compared to her. You betrayed me once, too.”

“Devlin, I loved you for too long for you to dismiss me this way. I loved you enough to step back when you were with her.”

“Step back? At what point did you step back, Jess? When you repeatedly tried to get me to fuck you? When you told her you’d always come first to me?”

“Ugh… This is pointless. I’m going back to Washington tonight.” She picked up her purse and tucked it under her arm. “The next time you need a substitute for that whore, don’t call me.”

“I never do.”

“Fuck you, Devlin.”

I shrugged, causing her to storm out of the office, slamming the door shut behind her.

I spun the chair around, staring at the city lights against the dark night sky. As much as I hated to admit it, there had to come a time when I let Juliana go. It’s not like I hadn’t tried. I threw myself into risky business deals just to keep myself busy. I fucked women who were extreme opposites of her in hopes of not seeing her face every time I needed to come. Her memories followed me anyway—haunted me permanently. I moved to Boston because it was the last place she’d been spotted. I stood and gazed out over the darkened city. I couldn’t even look out at the view without remembering her.

“There’s beauty in the darkness. Have you ever looked out your window, Devlin?” Her small hand pulled me over to the wall-to-wall glass that ran across half my office.

Of course, I have. I’ve had this office for years.

“No.” She pulled my chair up to the window and gestured for me to sit. She stood behind my chair, covering my eyes with her hands.

“Keep them closed,” she said as she moved across the room. The shadows over my eyes grew darker as she flicked the light off. Then her lips were at my ear again, her voice warm and seductive.

“I wish you could see yourself the way I do. You’re so fixated on the dark parts of you that you never see the good. You stand in front of this window every day and night and gaze out, but you never really see it. Open your eyes and see it.”

When I did as she said, my breath caught. Not because there was something I hadn’t seen before my eyes, but because she’d brought the city lights in. The ceiling of the office had lights strung across it in intricate patterns that easily intertwined with the night sky. I felt like I was sitting on the edge.

I was sitting on the sky’s boundary, experiencing its hidden beauty while Juliana whispered into my ear.

“At night, when you seem comfortable being Devlin Ward, I see you. The real you. In the dead of night when it’s just you and me... warm skin, hot breaths, and silence… That’s when your light glows, and it’s more beautiful than the stars and city lights combined.”

She finally left her post behind my chair and straddled my hips, her hands cupping my face—eyes entrancing me. “At night, when we lie in bed, your fingers caressing my skin, your lips against my neck... I don’t see a monster, I see Devlin Ward. And yes, he’s angry and sad, but most of all, he’s gentle, caring, and beautiful.”

She traced my lips with her fingers. The lights beyond the window framed her beauty, glowing off her dark hair. “I love you, Devlin.”

She’d shown me beauty that night, and there was this intense sensation constricting my chest. When she leaned in and kissed me, I knew she’d shown me more than the beauty in the darkness. She showed something I’d never witnessed. Love.

But she was wrong about one thing…

I gathered my suitcase and glanced out the window one more time before turning to leave the office.

The night lights weren’t in me. She was the light to my darkness, and I’ve never looked at it the same since she left.





Chapter Thirty-Three

Juliana

The music moved me, gave me wings, and brought my spirit to life. The soft notes from the lone piano played beautiful chords that created a mournful tune. I spun and executed the leap gracefully. My gaze fell upon Joshua, the pianist who orchestrated the music that sang to my soul. I didn’t dance to the music. Instead, it always seemed his fingers followed my motions. He was as inspired by my fluidity as I was his melodic genius. Together, we were the show. We awakened the old theater and inspired animation from a solemn audience.