Deviant(79)

I got to my car and started her up. I put the heat on and grabbed the wheel with a deep breath. I didn’t want to lose it here. I couldn’t. I had to get home first. I had to lock myself away from prying eyes and just be alone in my bed. It was only nine at night, but I didn’t care. The first thing I would do when I got in was shower and get straight to bed.

And that’s exactly what I did.





Chapter 30



Dean



Revenge is barren in itself. It is the dreadful food it feeds on.

Its delight is murder, and its end is despair.

Friedrich Schiller





I was wound up tight, wondering where she had been the last four days. I even found myself outside her parents’ house, wondering if she had found out who I was and decided to flee to the safest place she could think of. However, a part of me didn’t think Tyler was the type of girl to run and hide. She would face me head-to-head. I knew that because that was the girl I fell in love with all those years ago. The girl I thought I would marry. The girl who turned me into the beast I am. What Tyler didn’t realise was I would have given her everything if she had asked. She would have never been lonely, never been scared, never would have wanted for anything. I had the means to give her everything beyond her wildest dreams. Even if she wanted a trip into space to see the stars up close, I would have gone to hell and back to get it for her. The only thing I would have asked for in return was her love, affection, and complete and utter loyalty. I didn’t think that was too much to ask. Now I was a man incapable of love. A demon who sought to hurt and destroy. A beast who sought revenge.

I was getting a little too antsy. I wanted to know where she was and who she was with. In the end, I found myself driving towards her apartment a little earlier than normal, just so I could make a decision on my next move if she wasn’t there. I took the Vanquish tonight, simply because I could do with a rest from the Dodge. I had driven up here too many times in that car. It was best to remain elusive in my actions. I didn’t want to become too predictable.

I parked in my normal spot and took the stairs. My heart was thumping again because I didn’t know what I would find. I didn’t want the disappointment of knowing there was an empty apartment that hadn’t been used in days.

With a careful turn of the key, I pulled up my hood and pushed the door open a little. Everything was dark so I assumed she wasn’t home again. But then I saw her bag, coat, and keys, and knew she must be here somewhere. I shut the door behind me and, as quietly as I could, I edged towards her bedroom. When I got to her door and pushed it open, what I saw floored me. Tyler was lying on the bed with a nightie on. She was curled up into a ball, holding onto some tissues. She had been crying. A part of me wanted to rush to her, scoop her into my arms, and tell her everything was going to be okay. Me, the one who wanted to harm her, suddenly had this urge to protect her from the horrible outside world? What was wrong with me? I needed to get a fucking grip. For a moment, I thought maybe I should leave. In fact, I turned to do just that when I heard her voice.

“Please hold me,” she whispered, a whimper in her voice. My whole body tensed, my teeth clenched, and my heart thumped at the thought that Tyler needed me. Of course she needed me. That was what I had planned all along. But why was she here after being away for days? Why had she been crying? Who the fuck did that to her?

Against my better judgement, I walked over to Tyler’s bed and lay beside her. She curled her back into the curve of my body, and I immediately caught that familiar whiff of her coconut lotion. I couldn’t help it. My dick reacted. It always did around her.

“Where have you been?” I asked a little sternly.

“I don’t want to talk about it. Please, can you just hold me?”

The burn in my stomach surfaced at the thought that someone had done this to her. “Did some fucker hurt you?” I asked without thinking. It sounded like I cared, and I’m not supposed to care. I’m not supposed to want to rip apart whoever dared to come within five feet of her. I shouldn’t give a shit but, for some reason, another ugly demon surfaced within me. I could feel the rage at the thought of another man touching her, another man daring to come near her, another man hurting her. If anyone needed to fulfil that desire, it was me. I shouldn’t want to protect her, I shouldn’t want to care for her, and I certainly shouldn’t want to fucking scoop her away and never let her go.

“No one hurt me,” she whispered again. The way she said it was like her heart was breaking. It was all too much to listen to. When I was about to ask her what happened, she turned to me. She tried, but failed to find my face. I could see her twinkly eyes trying to find me in the dark.