Deviant(77)

I sighed, but accepted the fact that Jeremy was now a part of me and probably knew more about me than anyone. I trusted him implicitly, and I hoped he felt the same about me.

Shifting in my seat, I began my story. “Well, when I was six-years-old, I lived in Buckinghamshire. Ever since I could remember, I was best friends with this boy named Ian. I started my second year of school and the first day, Dean arrived. We were inseparable. We grew up together, played together, went through puberty together. We all had a connection, a strong bond we thought would last until the day we died.”

Jeremy quickly cut in. “What happened?” He looked really interested and it made me smile a little. It also made me a little sad thinking about all I had lost.

“As I said, we grew up together and were all really close, but Dean and I were closer. We would do things together.” I saw Jeremy’s eyebrow hitch, and I swatted him. “Not like that, Jeremy. He was always a gentleman. He told me he wanted us to be together, but because he was two years older, he wanted to wait until I was at a more mature age.” I saw Jeremy smile. “Stop that. Why does everything have to be smutty with you?” I joked.

Jeremy shook his head with a smile. “It doesn’t. Please, go on. I want to hear the rest.”

I saw how serious he was, so I continued, “Dean made his intentions clear. He even hinted at marriage and flowers—”

“Flowers?”

I nodded. “Yeah, flowers. He said I was the type of woman that should have a flower brought home to her every day, and he would do that with me once we were married. He was waiting for me, and the more he waited, the more I wanted it all to be true. I loved him, Jeremy. I know that sounds crazy to say when I was so young, but it’s just something—”

“That you will never get over,” Jeremy finished.

I smiled, but nodded. “Yes, exactly.”

“So, what happened? I mean, something must have happened; otherwise, you would have mentioned him by now. Not once have you said his name. If it wasn’t for that dream, I’m guessing I never would have known about him at all.”

I laughed a little, thinking how perceptive he was for someone so young. “I’m still really good friends with Ian. We never lost touch. We went to school together, the university together, and we’re now working together.”

“But Dean?”

“Dean disappeared one day. He and his family just up and left without a word. Dean warned me he may be leaving, but I never really thought it would happen. He promised me he would come back for me if it did, but he never returned. To this day, I don’t know why he left, or why he never returned like he was supposed to. Like I said, he was my first love and someone I thought I was meant to spend the rest of my life with.”

“Did you and he...?” Jeremy asked, a smile on his face.

“No,” I smirked back. “But we were supposed to once I turned sixteen. He was determined to wait for me until at least then.”

“So he left before you were sixteen?”

“No, just after.”

“So you never had a chance.”

“No.”

“So, who did you finally lose it with?”

I sighed. “Once I had passed all my A-levels at eighteen, we all went to a friend’s house. It was a huge party because everyone was celebrating their end-of-year results. I got a little drunk and met someone. We immediately hit it off. His name was Dillon and I liked him simply because he was kind of mysterious. You see, he had a lot of hair, but I knew there was someone I wanted to get to know underneath it all. With the alcohol running through my system, I told him I was still a virgin. He was shocked because I think every girl my age had slept with at least one person by now. I was in the minority. Anyway, one thing led to another. He offered, I accepted, and the rest is history.”

“Was it good?” he asked, excited.

I winced a little, remembering that it was a little painful. “It was how I expected for my first time, but Dillon was unbelievably gentle. He was patient and kind, making the whole process more pleasurable than I could have imagined.” Why on earth I was telling him this, I had no idea.

“So what happened to Dillon? Did you see each other again? Start a relationship?”

I shook my head. “No. I never saw or heard from him again, and that was fine by me. Dillon made sure I got what I was after, and if I had to do it all over again, I would. I would much rather have it like that than some random guy who didn’t give a crap about my feelings.” I sighed, sinking back in my chair before looking up to meet Jeremy’s eyes. “Why am I telling you all this?” I asked with a laugh.