Dear Professor(48)

“Do it and so help me, Jordan, I will slap the shit out of you.”

“Your defiance does nothing to deter my desire.”

“No.” I yanked my hand back. “No. Does that ‘deter your desire’? Or will you still try it?”

The air stilled as he did. His eyes flashed threateningly, but there was a horrified glimmer behind it.

“Is that what you think of me?” he asked. “That I desire you so strongly that I’d ignore your refusal? That I’d rape you?”

I felt sick to my stomach at my insinuation. I grasped my neck lightly with my hand and dropped my gaze to the floor. “No,” I said gently. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to say that.”

His chest shuddered as he took a deep breath and rubbed his hand over the top of his head. His gaze traveled around the room, and he exhaled in a long, shaky whoosh that seemed to scream with its heaviness.

“Understand this: I will never hurt you.”

“In a bad way, right?”

“In a bad way.” His mouth twitched. “Never. I will always respect your wishes. You say no, I hear no.”

“I know.”

“And, to answer your questions, yes.” Jordan took two steps toward me and reached for my hand.

Gently, he removed it from my neck and dropped it to my side. He dropped his gaze to my shoulder and ran his thumb across the enclave of my collarbone. Tiny explosions scattered my skin as he touched my pulse point.

“I’ve thought about it more times than is healthy for a person,” he said, “but that doesn’t change a thing. Neither does my acknowledgement of the wrongness and, indeed, legality of this situation.”

“You mean illegality.”

“That too.” His gaze found mine. His fingertips brushed across my forehead as he pushed hair from my eyes. “I want you. I can’t change that. I don’t want to change it. I want to have you over and over as many times as you’ll let me. I want you to walk into my damn classroom four days a week and know that I’m under your skin. I want you to smell like me so strongly that even a shower couldn’t scrub me from your body. I want every single little bit of you.”

“You have it though, don’t you? There’s a lot of paperwork with my signature on that says so.” My jaw tightened.#p#分页标题#e#

He took my chin in his hand and ghosted his thumb over my lower lip. His gaze dropped to my mouth, and he murmured, “Craving you isn’t something I have control over, Darcy. I’ve tried to control it, but I can’t fucking fight it. There isn’t a quiet minute of my day when I don’t imagine your body beneath mine, my breath on your skin, and your nails in my back.”

Heat spread across my skin from where he was touching me. It was an automatic reaction. And his words—crap. They rang so true. They hadn’t been bitten out or forced. They had been said in a tone so low and husky that they could be nothing but completely right.

That…terrified me. Like nothing else.

Everyone wanted to be desired, but I doubted many people ever felt it as intensely as I did.

“I think I should go,” I said quietly. “It’s getting late.”

His eyes searched mine for a moment that had time standing still. “I agree. We’ll speak tomorrow?”

I nodded and stepped back as his hand fell away. My things were all on the coffee table, so I grabbed them and darted past him.

“Darcy?”

I turned at the door. “Yeah?”

“Please let me know when you get home safely.”

Once again, I nodded, and then I dropped my head and hurried out of his house.

I didn’t feel right until I’d driven off of his property.





I was stuck between a rock and a hard place. Either that or I was the rock and the hard place.

Last night was playing on my mind over and over. It’d been a long time since I’d felt so many things in one night. I was no robot, but after Griffin had died, it had been easier to shut myself off from the world and cruise through with a one-track mind.

It’s why I loved what I did. There was no time for relationships. I couldn’t have love ripped away from me if it never existed.

That was the first line I’d written on the new page of my journal. It seemed a fitting line to start this particular entry. Unfortunately, that was all I’d written, and judging by the chaos of my mind, it would be the only one I’d write today. Which in itself was also fitting.

Over the last two years, I’d spent a lot of time imagining what my life would be like when I found the man who would tear the barriers down and open my eyes to the world once more. I didn’t want to give my heart to just anyone. It had to be the person the universe couldn’t and wouldn’t take away from me.