Dear Bridget, I Want You(25)
“How old were you when you first got hair on your face?”
“I don’t remember…probably a teenager. Listen, this has a sharp blade. It’s very dangerous and not something you should ever be playing around with.”
He stepped down off the stool. “My daddy used to shave a lot.”
I knelt down and softened my tone. “Yeah?”
“I don’t remember too much, but I remember him shaving right here. Are you gonna tell my mom?”
“Nah. Bro code, remember? But just promise me you won’t play with razors anymore.”
“I won’t.”
“Here, let’s wash your face.”
He stood back up on the stool as I ran the faucet.
I cupped the water in my hand and began removing the cream from his face as I said, “Trust me, you should be enjoying just being a kid. You’re gonna grow up faster than you know. It’s life experiences that make you a grown-up, not some hair on your face. We never really stop growing, actually. I think I still have a lot of growing up to do myself sometimes.”
“You look grown up to me.”
“Is that so?” I pointed to my head. “Well, I was referring to what’s in here. Sometimes, I still feel like a kid myself. Anyway, someday, you’re gonna look back at this and laugh because you’ll dread having to shave all of the time just so you don’t end up looking like Santa Claus.”
“If you didn’t shave, would you look like him?”
I grinned. “I guess I would, like a tall, blond, trimmer Santa, yeah.”
“That would be really funny.”
I grabbed a towel. “Let’s dry your face.”
“Are you mad at me?” he suddenly said.
“For the shaving? No, I get it.”
“No, I mean, you stopped having breakfast with us and taking me to school sometimes. Did I do something bad?”
Bloody hell. My heart felt like it was going to break in two. I guess I had secretly hoped that Brendan wasn’t wondering what was up with me. I knelt down and placed my hands around his cheeks.
“No, little guy. Of course, not.”
“Why did you stop playing with me, then?”
I didn’t want to lie to him and tell him I’d been busy. I honestly didn’t know how to answer him. I certainly couldn’t admit that I’d been avoiding him so that he wouldn’t get attached to me. I just froze.
“It has nothing to do with being mad at you.” When he still looked a bit sad, I gave him a hug. “Come here.” Pulling back to face him, I said, “I’ll tell you what…I have tomorrow night off. Why don’t you and I go throw around a football at the park after school or something, maybe get some ice cream. Would you like that?”
He jumped up and down. “Yeah!”
Feeling conflicted, I smiled. “Okay.”
Bridget’s voice came from behind me. “What’s going on in here?”
I looked her up and down, taking notice of her wind-blown, light brown locks. “Uh…we were just having a man-to-man chat.”
“Oh, really.” She looked skeptical. “What’s the razor doing out? And there’s water all over the sink.”
“It’s fine, Bridget. Everything’s under control.”
She looked down at her son. “Brendan, I thought you were supposed to be doing your reading homework.”
“Sorry, Mom.”
“Go to your room, please.”
After Brendan ran to his room, I followed Bridget out to the kitchen.
“What was he really doing in there?” she asked.
“I told him I wouldn’t tell you.”
She glared at me. “Tell me, Simon.”
“Alright, don’t tell him I told you, but…he was trying to shave.”
Her mouth dropped open. “What?”
“Yeah.”
She laughed a little. “Oh my God.”
“It’s alright. We discussed it. Someone at school told him he would grow hair if he shaved.”
“Let me tell you, I don’t know what I’m going to do with a boy…especially the older he gets.”
“You’ll do just fine. You certainly have up until this point. Just take one day at a time.”
“I’m glad he didn’t cut himself. Thank you for intervening. I guess I know I can’t trust him to be alone in his room while I work in the yard.”
I paused, unsure of whether to tell her the next thing that came to mind. “He said he remembered his dad shaving. I think that might have had something to do with why he wanted to do it.”
Bridget sighed and nodded her head in thought. “He doesn’t remember too many things about Ben very clearly, just odd things here and there. His dad worked a lot, so that didn’t help. Of course, now I’m the one working all the time.”