Creators(31)

“What he did to you is one of the most vile, sickening things I can imagine one person doing to another. What right do any of us have to wreck people’s lives for our own personal gain?”

“He didn’t force me. I gave myself to him willingly. It’s my fault as much as his,” she said. “Even if I make it through this, I’m ruined. Who would want me? I gave myself to a chosen one.”

“You listen to me, Louisa,” Lockwood demanded. His voice carried a tone I had never heard before. “Maybe you were naive. Maybe you share the blame, but in no way should that bastard not be damned a thousand times for how he used you.”

“But—”

“No,” Lockwood interrupted. “I’m not done. I want you to understand one thing. You are not ruined. You are not beyond repair. When you make it through this, and you will, you deserve to find happiness just as much as anyone else who walks this world.”

I dropped my hand and took a step away from the door. I wouldn’t interrupt their moment. I knew what it meant to have a person like Lockwood in your life. A person who was there for you and guided you, not out of some assumed family obligation, but because he wanted to be there.

I walked into the night air. I walked and walked until I reached the border. I nodded to the guards, my father’s men, who patrolled. Unlike before, when we could go if we wanted, my father forbade anyone from leaving the community unless it was to report to one of the farms for work. I leaned against the gate and looked up at the stars.

Somewhere, James was just as trapped as I was.

I thought of the morning after we’d had sex. When it was over, we’d lain with each other, curled against one another, never beginning and never ending. We’d stayed like that till the sun began to rise.

James had reached down and pulled me off the ground. He’d worn a satisfied grin on his face. “Someone is mighty proud of himself,” I teased.

He’d laughed. It bounced through the forest, calling it awake. Readying it for the day. “I’m just insanely happy.”

I stood on the tips of my toes and kissed him gently on his scar. “I’m insanely happy too,” I whispered.

James looked down at me, and I was lost all over again. I would never tire of looking into those mismatched eyes. They didn’t make him different. They made him him. He chuckled as he reached over and pulled a leaf from my tangled hair. “They’ll know just by looking at you that we’ve been up to no good.”

“No good?” I said. “I thought it was very, very good.”

James growled and lifted me up into the air. I wrapped my legs around his waist and he pressed his lips hungrily against mine. I moved my hands to his hair, curling my fingers into it, attaching myself to him. I never wanted to let go. Every part of me ached to be touched by him, and every part of me ached to touch him right back.

“Do you know how much I love you?” he breathed into the base of my neck. His lips fluttered against my skin.

I nodded, kissing the top of his head. “As much as I love you.”

James slowly put my feet back on the ground. On the way down, I pressed my body against his. He cradled my face in his hands. “That will never change. No matter what.”

I looked deep into his eyes. “I know.” Because I did. It was one of life’s few assurances. I would always love James.

I pressed my lips once again to his scar. “I adore this,” I whispered, unable to hide the smile that seemed etched on my face all morning.

“Only you would love a man’s fault.” He chuckled.

“I love every part of you,” I replied, running my fingers down his chest.

“You’re enough to drive a man crazy,” he said. The tremble in his voice caused my toes to curl. I wanted him again. And again. And again.

My fingers traced the waist of his pants. “Tonight?” I said, knowing full well it was a promise I wouldn’t be able to keep.

James grabbed my hand and brought it to his lips. “Tonight,” he echoed.

As the sun climb higher into the sky, I knew our moment was coming to an end. James reached down and placed his hand over my heart. “Thank you,” he said.

“For what?” I asked, my voice choked with emotion.

“For everything.”

As the memory slipped away, I looked back up at the night sky. Praying and hoping that James knew how much I wanted to thank him, too.

For everything.





Chapter 13


Tess,

The memories are slipping. They have always been what I clung to in those moments when the thought of never seeing you again seems like the only possible ending to our story.

I flip through them like the pages of the books we used to share. I see you that day in the piano room. I remember how you played with such reckless abandon. I think I loved you even then. I loved the idea of you. So much passion within those delicate fingers as they pressed against the keys. You were already so different than what the council told me you would be. I saw it in the way you looked at me. An intelligence, a need that echoed mine in so many ways. The wish to be defiant.