Count On Me(79)

Chapter Twenty-Two



Belle



“Isabelle, are you alright?”

That’s such a silly question. Of course I’m not alright. She was in the gym just like I was. She saw what happened to me. How can anyone be alright after something like that?

“I—want—to—go—home.” I answer, my voice quivering after ever word.

Ms. Taylor got me out of the gym as quickly as she could and straight into the girl’s washroom, even though it’s the last place I want to be. I didn’t have the energy to stop her, so I went along with it. Now I’m locked in the stall alone, trying to calm myself and she’s on the other side worrying about me.

“As soon as you’re done, I’ll take you home sweetheart. Don’t you worry about that.”

Her words don’t offer much comfort. Telling me not to worry is pointless. That’s all I’m doing right now. I’m worrying about calming myself so I don’t ruin my dress, worrying about Kayden and what’s going to happen to him for what he did to Dillon. I’m worried about how I look to this teacher who seems to care about me. I’m just worried about everything.

“Can you call my mom?” I ask, my voice evening out though it comes out more of a whisper then I intended.

“I’ll do that as soon as you’re done.”

I slide the lock off the door and ease my way out, still shaky on my feet, but able to walk if it means getting out of here faster.

“I’m done. Can we please go now?”

“Absolutely.”

She walks ahead of me and pushes the door open, allowing me the chance to walk out before holding on to my arms and guiding me toward the front of the school. I hold my breath and close my eyes as she guides me, only releasing it the minute we’re safely outside.

I know she means well, doing this for me, but I hope she realizes that after she drops me off tonight, she won’t see me again.

The minute my mom hears about what happened, she’s going to keep me home and this time, I’m going to let her. I wanted to do right by her, letting her finally go back to work instead of having to stay home with me and look where it got us. After tonight, I’m not sure I’m ever going to be okay again.

Sitting in the warmth of Ms. Taylor’s car, I close my eyes and will the voices that have been flooding my head, to hush. I need quiet now. I can’t take much more of the Kayden rage show on repeat. Not only am I hearing his pre-recorded words on a loop, but I’m also hearing everything he said leading up to it.

Amy told me the truth and Kayden proved it.

His wish for me to be Homecoming Queen came true, which means, he knew about the montage they would be playing. He’d probably been the one that set it all up. Despite the angry way he turned on Dillon, who is also to blame, it had still been his voice saying those hateful things.

I was a game to him.

Did I know Kayden said mean things about me? Yeah, but the things on the tape tonight, were definitely not what I thought he was capable of saying. He’d done it though and no matter how hard he tried to deny it, he couldn’t.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Shaking my head, I hear her sigh and I wonder just how much pity she feels for me right now. She might be a special needs teacher and she might even care a little more than the others, but I’m pretty sure right now all she feels is pity and sadness.

“Isabelle, what happened in that auditorium tonight, it wasn’t your fault. You did nothing to deserve it. It should never have happened at all. I do not want you beating yourself up over this.”

Easy for you to say. You’re not the one everyone makes fun of and calls retarded.

“You’re an amazingly strong, talented and beautiful girl. That is what I want you to remember when I drop you off tonight. What happened is not a reflection on you; it’s a reflection on them.”

I just want her to drive faster, so I can get home, run to my room and never come out again. Can’t she just see that and make it happen already?

“Isabelle, I feel that I brought this on and for that, I’m deeply sorry.”

Well that’s new. How does she figure any of this is her fault?

“Why?”

“A few weeks ago, I spoke at length with Kayden about you. I showed him the writing assignment that I had you do. He asked me questions about you and the struggles you have. I gave as much factual information as I know, but I fear that after what happened tonight, I did the wrong thing.”

She talked to Kayden about me? When? He asked her about my autism? Why would he do that?

The questions keep coming at me and I shut my eyes again, trying to focus on something, anything that will stop the influx.