Broken Bear(4)

Lily thought back to the day Phoenix tore his hospital gown off. He was a wall of muscle, powerful and strong. Embarrassed, she could barely look away. Her eyes drifted lower as she took in all of him. She knew it was unprofessional and felt ashamed she’d seen him that way, letting her libido take priority over her professionalism in the moment of his nudity. Maybe if things had been better at home...maybe if she wasn’t so desperate...maybe…

Phoenix watched Lily in the corner of his new room. Why was she there? What did she want from him? He fell back into a drug induced sleep.

She watched as he slept. Even in his slumber, he suffered. He struggled with nightmares and rarely slept peacefully. Awake, he looked wounded, even though there was nothing physically wrong with him at this point.

Phoenix opened his eyes, coming out of the daze. A figure came into focus. It was his angel, back to see him again. She sat quietly reading a book, and only looked up when he stirred. How long had she been there? “Is there water?” His voice was gravely, his tone deep.

Lily knew it was foolish to be there, but it didn’t stop her from coming to see him. She stood and poured him some water from the plastic pitcher, then brought it to his lips. She quietly fed him a couple of sips. He was parched and licked his lips to take in any bit of moisture he could. She fed him more of the water, and then asked if he was finished. “Was that enough? Do you want more?”

He watched her eyes and nodded. She didn’t want to hurt him. She was here to help. Lily filled the small cup a second time and helped him drink. His hands were still restrained. She knew he could break through the restraints if he wanted to; she’d seen him do it before. He had strength she’d never seen, and she’d witnessed a lot in her days as a nurse. It was his spirit that was broken.

“How are you feeling?” She didn’t know if he would actually answer. He rarely did.

Phoenix looked away from her, making it clear he wasn’t ready to speak. He didn’t want use harsh language with her, and at this point he was afraid that was all that would come out of his mouth. He wasn’t angry with her; he was angry with himself and the entire world, but not his angel. She was the one who soothed him for some reason. She quietly sat by. Being there was enough. He felt better when he saw her sitting in the corner of the room, quietly reading. She didn’t demand answers, she didn’t ask him to talk, she simply appeared by his side to watch over him.

The ache grew from within as his clarity came back. The vision of his mother was fresh in his mind. It was too much. He wanted to be free of this living hell. Phoenix started to cry. He sobbed like a child, his body shaking as his mother’s face haunted him.

Lily’s heart broke, shattering in two. She wanted to take away his pain, but there was nothing she could do. After a moment’s hesitation, she placed her hand on his shoulder. She wanted to comfort him, but didn’t know how. The vibration of his sobs shook his body as he released the pain.

There was nothing to say; the struggle was inside. She had no words to comfort him and make it all better. Her eyes welled up with tears. She cried for him. She cried for his sorrow, and then cried for her own sorrows. Leaning forward, Lily gently hugged him. She placed a small kiss on his forehead. She stepped back and went to her chair to read. If he wanted to talk, she would be there for him.

The pinched doctor saw the girl who visited him regularly. When she asked her relation to Phoenix, she had a scathing response on learning she was a nurse from the trauma center. As a professional, she knew better than to get attached. She shook her head with disapproval and told her it was a mistake to keep visiting.

Lily said nothing, but continued to visit. Over time the doctor saw that he would only respond to this one girl. Nobody else came to see him, and he rarely spoke. When he did, he would only address Lily. He wanted nothing to do with the doctor.

His being there wasted her time and the hospital’s money, but she couldn’t unleash him into the world. She didn’t know if he was dangerous. Until he was willing to talk to the doctor, the court order kept him in place.





Chapter 5 - Phoenix





Lily dozed off in the corner chair. When Phoenix spoke, she was startled out of her sleep. He didn’t mean to wake her like that, but he had something to say. He wanted to say it before he fell into another slumber.

“Can you convince them to take off these restraints? I’m not going to hurt anybody.” He sounded like a broken man.

“They’re worried you’ll hurt yourself, too.” She stood and rubbed the back of her forearm across her eyes. “Or that you’ll try to leave.” She hated telling him the truth, but honesty was the best choice right now.