Broken Bear(2)

He slumped over and rested his head on the rubber mat. He was tired of being in a bed. At least they untied his arms. Only now, their answer was some padded room. It didn’t matter; he’d be locked in his own prison forever. The memories would haunt him. It didn’t matter if he was awake or asleep.

When the car submerged, water rushed in faster than they could get out. Phoenix was pinned and couldn’t reach her. As strong as he was, he couldn’t help. He watched his mother die beside him as she took the water deep into her lungs. She gave him life, and he took hers away. It was his fault.

His mother was coming home to visit. It was a special occasion. She’d been working overseas in Japan, and hadn’t been home in such a long time. She still had a couple of years ahead of her, but at least for now she’d be here on a break.

Phoenix picked her up at the airport. She beamed with pride, looking at her son as he towered over her. Coming home was just what she needed. To see her family meant everything to her. She missed them so much.

Unfortunately, the weather made the drive home dicey. It was a stormy night and the roads were slick. When the large truck veered into their lane, its high beams glaring at them, he jerked the wheel to avoid the oncoming collision. Only the car slid on the wet road and plunged into the river that ran along the side of the embankment. It all happened so fast.

The water rushed in too quickly. It seemed to be coming from every crevice, and their pocket of air was getting smaller and smaller. With everything he had in him, he pushed and pulled and tugged, and still nothing. He was pinned and couldn’t help her. Phoenix watched as the life drained from her body. By the time he broke free, it was too late.





Chapter 2 - Lily





The angel was back. The woman in white stood beside him when he woke. It was the same woman. He recognized her. Her hands were resting on her full, child-bearing hips.

“If you continue to act up, we’ll have to use the restraints again. I prefer that we didn’t.” Her voice was stern, but soft.

Phoenix stared at her and said nothing. She continued to talk anyway. “I can’t have you misbehaving, especially on my shift, okay?” Her voice was soothing. She wasn’t afraid of him, even though she’d seem him snap earlier. She tried to reach out to him, but he shut down.

Lily knew the basics of what happened and the guilt he was carrying. He talked in his sleep, and between that, the ambulance crew, and the newspapers, she’d gotten bits and pieces. She wondered if Phoenix knew how much time had passed. He’d been heavily medicated to stop him from clawing at himself. She had to wrap mittens around his hands and tie them in place the first few days. He was only coherent for a short bit, and then the meds would absorb and he’d be knocked out again.

Over the next few days, they cut down the dosage as much as they could, but when he got combative, there was no other choice. After the Code Gray, he was put in a safe room. They’d be moving him to another hospital after the court order went through. It was for his well-being.

She knew of the accident and what happened. What she didn’t know was that Phoenix Monroe was a bear shifter. Nobody at the hospital knew quite what or who they were dealing with. If he’d been able to clear his mind, he’d be able to shift...but with the medication, he couldn't focus his thoughts.

The broken man glared at his nurse. He didn’t want to be here, caged up like a fool. They thought they were helping him, saving him from himself. But they couldn’t save him. His hell was inside his brain. No amount of restraints could shut that down.

He hated the drugs. He hated the fogginess. He hated feeling out of control. Didn’t they know he was an alpha bear? His entire life, he’d been in control. He was a leader. He was strong. He was the one people came to when they needed help. If they knew, they’d treat him with more respect. Only they didn’t know. And he didn’t want to tell them. He couldn’t. Humans were nervous around shifters. And yet, when he was ready, he’d let them know exactly who he was. There would be no question remaining.

His brother drifted into his mind, and then his father. All this time he’d only thought of his own torment. He knew Carter would blame him...with good reason. He blamed him for everything, but this time he’d be right. They were never that close. He’d never let go of the fact that Phoenix was responsible for their mother’s death. He expected the same from his father. Neither had come to see him that he was aware of, though he’d spent the last few days unconscious and drugged. He didn’t blame them. They had every right to hate him.

He wouldn’t be able to go home. What was home anyway? It hadn’t been a real home since his mother left for Japan. Her work called her overseas with a contract offer she couldn’t refuse. Her kids were grown, and she was focused on her career at this point. And as for his father, being a bear, he was a loner, only coming and going time to time. His mother still had a few years to finish the contract, but got to finally come home for a visit. She never made it home. Now he’d never go home either. He deserved no less.