Bleeding Love(64)

“Please what, darlin’. Tell me what you need.”

“I need to feel all of you,” she says softly. “Cover me and take me, but I have to feel you.”

Understanding hits and my heart pounds even quicker. God, my sweet girl. She might understand that while my job holds a fraction of the danger that her husband’s did, but she needs to rid herself of those ghosts today’s spell brought back, by reminding herself that I am very much alive.

And to do that, she needs to feel.

Feel alive.

I close my eyes and drop my head to hers. My body follows until I’ve given her as much weight as I can. Her legs come up and wrap tightly around my hips. I feel her arms at my side and then around my back. Then, her head comes up and her mouth fuses with mine.

Only then, when she’s completely wrapped herself around me, do I continue to move inside her. My arms against the mattress, elbows digging in, and hands in her hair. There isn’t an inch of our bodies that doesn’t feel the other. Even though my body is screaming for it, I rock slowly, and give her everything that she needs.

With each thrust, I pray that she feels what she needs. Our lips never part and when I feel her walls tighten and her wetness coat my cock, only then do I push deep and come harder than I’ve ever felt before.

“I love you,” she whispers in my ear, her breathing coming in choked pants.

“I love you, too, Megan. So much, darlin’.”





IT’S BEEN A MONTH SINCE I lost my mind over Lee’s job. A month of him handling me with care, but also a month that’s been full of healing. It’s been hard at times, but he’s been there for every stumble to help pick me back up. At his urging I started seeing a grief counselor. I’ll admit now that it’s a step I should have taken on my own years ago, but with both of their help, I’ve been able to let go of almost all of my pain. Lee started coming to my twice a week meetings at the counselor’s urging. It started about three weeks after I started going and I’m glad I made that step. Having him with me, his hand in mine, was a strength I needed to get through some hard memories.

It was also through those meetings that he made it clear, sometimes with and sometimes without words that a huge part of him fell in love with me because of my strength. I didn’t understand it, because I’ve felt nothing but weakness, but Lee told me, in those meetings, that only a person with a strength of an army would keep fighting to live. I couldn’t see it, living in pain, but he’s right—something I can see now—I’ve been fighting my whole life. Losing Jack was a hard blow and even though it took me a long time to battle the depression his death set upon me, I never gave up.

Another milestone that we made as our new threesome, was Lee’s relationship with Molly. I haven’t been shocked that she fell into her love for him easily, that’s just who Molly is. She doesn’t doubt her feelings.

Needless to say, they have been inseparable. Regardless of if we’re at our house, his, or out, my daughter is always as close as she can get to him. Lee and I talked about it and we both agree that it is just the way Molly is. She wants him to know how much he means to her, but because she’s so young she doesn’t know how to verbalize it, instead she gives him what she can. Herself.

Seeing them together was a big part in my healing. Seeing that she loves him as much as I do, gives me the reassurance that we’re where we’re meant to be.

Lee showed me again how big his heart was when he fell into his new role as a father figure with effortless ease. His protective nature only adding to the power in which his bond formed with her. You can tell, there is nothing but love that he feels for his girls.

And that’s what we’ve become—gladly—to him. We’re his girls and he . . . he is our man.

Today is my last step in letting go. One that I’ve been putting off, but now I know needs to happen for us all to move on completely pain free. I don’t think I was putting it off because I wasn’t ready, but more that I didn’t know how to do it or what to say.

How do you tell your dead husband that you’ve moved on?

I look up and see Lee walking with Molly as I trail behind them. When we got to the graveyard he had asked for me to give him a second and then took off in the direction I had told him when he asked where Jack was. When he reached his hand out for Molly’s my reaction couldn’t be stopped. I gasped, but Lee being his confident self, just gave me soft eyes.

Which leads me to now, as I watch them strolling through the headstones hand in hand. I move to a bench about ten paces from Jack’s spot and wait. I used to only come every month, sometimes when the pain was too much, I wouldn’t come until it eased up a little. Now, for the last year, I’ve been coming with Molly every two weeks. This, however, is the first time we’ve asked Lee to come.