Back to You(25)

The cab ride back to the house is awkward and quiet. Mia manages to nod off, probably exhausted from the heat and from emptying herself of everything she was holding inside her. I hate myself for not letting her do it sooner. If I had, maybe we’d be making out in the back seat of this car instead of struggling to survive the evening.

She was definitely right, though. We did need to get that off our chests. It was liberating in a sense that we held nothing back and even if every single question wasn’t answered with thorough detail, releasing the anger and doubt is a weight off our worried minds. And now I know one thing for certain. There is no fucking way in hell I can take that offer from Robert.

The distance would put us back ten more steps. It would kill Mia to be apart again. Fuck that! It would kill me to be apart from my family and cause anymore turmoil. I need my wife, I need my kids—do I need my job? Yes. But I can always find another one.

Just as I take out my phone to send an email to Robert, Mia starts to rustle beside me.

I return the phone to my pocket and place my hand on her thigh. “Feel any better?”

She shrugs her shoulders, still groggy. “The headache’s gone and the air conditioning is a godsend, but—”

She doesn’t have to finish. I know the rest of her answer. “I know, baby. Rome wasn’t built in a day, but this is a start. We’re gonna be okay. I promise.”

Turning her head to look out the window, she places her hand over mine. “I’m sorry I ruined our day—and the trip. I know this isn’t what you had in mind.”

The last thing I want is for her to think she ruined anything. If anything, hearing her say what she said, and getting my own insecurities out there for her—it made things better. More honest. More real.

“Hey. Look at me,” I say.

She turns from the window and looks into my eyes. When the tears start to well up again, she removes her gaze from mine and stares into her lap.

I place a finger under her chin, tilting her in my direction. “Look. At. Me.”

When she does, I smile. The gesture calms her—I can see it in her eyes. A shy smile of her own forms on her beautiful lips and I want so badly to lean down and kiss them, but I hesitate because I know she needs more than touch right now. Sometimes words do speak louder than actions. “You ruined nothing. We still have plenty of time in Newport—unless of course you want to go home.” Shit. I hadn’t thought of that. Maybe she doesn’t want to be alone with me after all that.

“Oh my God, Dec. Are you crazy? Of course I don’t want to go home. See, I did fuck it all up. What’s wrong with me?” She brings her hands up to her face, covering her eyes. Muffling her cries, her body trembles.

I move as close to her as I possibly can, enveloping her in my arms and pulling her against me. “There’s nothing wrong with you, Mia. In fact, I commend you for how well you’ve handled all of this. We’ve been through shit and I thought that just pushing it under the rug and ignoring it would eventually make it go away, but obviously I was wrong. This was good. This was what we needed. I understand everything now—it’s all clear. And now—baby, now we can move on.”

Her body stills and her sobbing stops. With her body still pressed up against me, she wipes the last of the tears from her face and takes a deep breath. “You’re right. What’s done is done and we can’t go back and change it, but we can move forward and that’s all I want for us.”

“Good,” I say, kissing the top of her head. “Tomorrow’s a new day. We can relax on the beach, stay in and veg all day, or jump out of a fucking plane if that’s what you want to do. I’ll do anything that’ll make you happy, baby. Always. That’s all I want.”

“How did I get so lucky?” she asks, sniffling back the last of the tears.

“You said yes to a crush-sick virgin in a library and the rest, my love, is history.”





Mia’s still spent, even after her nap in the cab. It’s only nine o’clock, but I convince her to take a bath and then go up to bed. I’m pretty shot myself, but there’s something I want to take care of before I lose my nerve. I know Mia might want to kill me for not consulting with her, but nothing she can say can make me change my mind.

“Yello,” Robert says when he picks up his cell. From the sounds in the background, I can tell he’s still in the office. Perfect. He’s working late and probably irritated because of it. I couldn’t have caught him at a worse time. I’d better come to terms with the fact that I might be about to lose my fucking job.