Adorkable(62)
Waiting for the bell to ring, I washed my hands, took my time examining the soap machine. I was going to be late for first, but Ms. Vega loved me, and German was my best subject. I didn’t want to chance running into anyone on my way out.
The bell sounded, and I exhaled. Grabbing my books, I pulled open the door and stepped out into the empty hallway.
“That’s the second time you’ve done that.”
I gasped, spinning to find Becks leaning against the little strip of wall directly beside the bathroom.
“Becks, you scared me,” I said, still trying to calm my frantic nerves.
“Sorry.” He straightened and walked over, not stopping until we were face to face. “What’s up with all this running into bathrooms whenever you see me?”
When in doubt, go for the gross-out factor. “Well, I ate some really bad fish last night and—”
He held up a hand, nose scrunched. “Yeah, okay. I don’t want to know.”
“Okay.”
Looking down, he shoved his hands into his pockets. “Listen Sal…about what happened at the party, I—”
“It was great, wasn’t it?” I chuckled, just like I’d practiced it at home, as his head shot up in surprise. “That was some of my best work.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I don’t think anyone had any doubts after that performance. Bally is officially over. It’s such a relief, isn’t it?”
“You’re saying it was all an act?” His eyes narrowed in suspicion. “I didn’t know you could cry on cue, Sal.”
I waved him off dismissively. “The tears were a great touch, right? I think it added just the right amount of drama.”
“So, when you were saying all that stuff… What did you say exactly?”
“Basically, a whole bunch of crap about how I couldn’t keep doing this—,” Truth. “—how you’d broken my heart—,” Truth. “—and how I’d never forgive you—.” Lie. “—That kind of stuff.”
“And you did it in German because…” he trailed off, waiting for me to fill in the blanks.
“Well, because no one would understand it, of course. Again, it was all about upping the drama.” I widened my eyes, reaching out to grab his arm. “You’re not mad are you? Oh Becks, I tried my best to do it right. Was it too over the top? Do you think people might not have believed me?”
“I sure did,” he muttered, running a hand through his hair. Why did he look so…upset? “So, we’re okay?”
“‘Course we are.” I smiled so hard it hurt my cheeks. “Why wouldn’t we be?”
“Sal, I want you to know—” He stopped suddenly, shook his head.
“What, Becks?”
“Nothing.” He cleared his throat and then grinned. “Thanks for letting me be your fake boyfriend, Sal. I’m glad you asked me. It was fun.”
“Yeah,” I said, “I’m glad, too. Now that you’re not chained to me, you can go out with whoever you want. I’m sure all the girls’ll be happy to have you back.”
“Hmm,” he agreed, “and you can give it a go with that secret crush of yours.”
The sound that escaped my lips was too strangled to be a laugh. I only hoped Becks didn’t notice.
“I’ve got to go,” he said, turning, “but I’ll see you at practice after school, okay?”
“Sure.”
As soon as he was gone, I slumped, the smile slipping from my face. At least he’d believed me, I thought. And now there was nothing holding him back anymore. Becks could get any girl he wanted. I wished I could’ve been happier for him, but with my own feelings so mixed up, there was just no way. The guilt was gone—that was a plus—but in its place there were all these new emotions.
Like whenever I saw him with another girl.
“Hey, Becks.” A cheek rub. “Looking good.”
“Wanna go out tonight, Becks?”
“God Becks, your arms are so tight. Come over to my house later?”
The flirting was old news, but the way it made me feel was what’d changed. Anger came first, hot and heavy, followed by jealousy and then the quick sting of self-loathing as I realized I had no right to either of those feelings
When Mercedes kissed his cheek, I finally blew.
“You’re just going let her do that?” I said, voice angry, though it’d been her fault, not his.
“What?” Becks said. “The girl pounced. What was I supposed to do, hit her?”
I shook my head in disgust. “Don’t you have any self-respect?”