Adorkable(59)

“It’s fine.” He covered my hand with his. “I cut myself shaving all the time.”

“Sorry.” Pulling my hand away, I let him wipe off the left-over cream. I couldn’t have heard right. “What did you just say? Becks, you were the one who said this would be the perfect place.”

“I know.” He laid the cloth aside.

“We have to ease people into it. Those were your words.”

“I remember.”

“Well? What changed?”

Becks locked eyes with me. “Do you really love my hair?”

The question threw me. “It’s not horrible.”

“You’re a terrible liar.” Becks shook his head, gliding a hand across my cheek. “I don’t think we should break up.”

“You don’t?”

“No.”

My voice was paper thin. “Why?”

“Well, the fake boyfriend thing has worked out pretty good so far. Don’t you think?”

I couldn’t speak as he leaned even closer.

“And there are some advantages.”

Before I could ask what those were, his lips were on mine. Becks’s fingers threaded into my hair, the other hand at my waist, his mouth warm, caressing. I could feel the kiss down to my bones. It rippled through me, his passion, and my love for him rose up to meet it. Like waves crashing, we tangled together, mixing, melting into each other. It was the first time Becks had ever kissed me, really kissed me, and for a few seconds afterward, I couldn’t speak. He’d stolen my breath.

“Becks,” I gasped, eyes closed, his forehead pressed against mine. I was so happy; my voice shook.

“Hmm?”

“I can’t believe you just did that.”

He laughed roughly. “Me either.”

As I opened my eyes, his were still shut, a small smile on his lips as he played with the ends of my hair. I turned my head and caught flash of bright green by the door. Mercedes.

“Oh.” I pulled away, heart sinking. “I get it now.”

“Get what?” Becks said.

“This was for her.” As Becks followed my gaze, the girl jumped and hurried away. With each tap of her heels, I felt another pang go through me. “Good one, Becks. You were really convincing.”

“Yeah,” he said, back still to me, “convincing.”

“That’s what this was, wasn’t it? What you said, that kiss, it was just you being a great fake boyfriend.” In my mind, I begged him to say no. To tell me I was wrong. Please, please, let me be wrong. “This was all just part of the plan to convince her.”

Becks studied my face. There was an odd little frown on his mouth, but it disappeared as he grinned. “Of course, it was. Jeez, Sal, don’t look so worried. Was she watching the whole time?”

“Not sure,” I said, smile wavering. My eyes felt wet, but I wouldn’t let the tears fall. “You know, I didn’t realize we had an audience.”

Becks shrugged, his eyes watching me carefully. “Why else would I kiss you?”

That hit home.

Jumping from the counter, I rushed for the front door. I heard Becks call my name but didn’t pause. Getting away was the only option. Otherwise, he’d see me cry, and that wasn’t going to happen, not over this. I wasn’t stupid. I’d known Becks didn’t love me, but having it confirmed, having it said so plainly after that amazing kiss, I couldn’t take it.

Becks caught my arm on the last step of the porch. “Sal, what’s wrong?”

I didn’t know if it was his touch or the stupid question, but something sparked a fire inside me.

Spinning around, I let it all out. My frustration, my anger, my love, the truth, the words poured from my lips like a waterfall. I told him how mad I was that he’d kissed me just for Mercedes’s benefit, how I wanted him as my real boyfriend not a fake one, how I’d loved him all my life and what an idiot he was for not noticing. I told him everything I’d been afraid to tell him over the years.

And true to form, I said it all in German.

Whenever my blood was up, it became my native tongue. There was something freeing in saying everything out loud, and I did it without fear or restraint, knowing that neither Becks nor any of the bystanders looking would understand what I was saying. And there were plenty of those. Half the party seemed to have followed us onto the front lawn, watching as I ranted at Becks like a mad woman.

When I came to the end, I was breathing heavy, and Becks looked more shocked than I’d ever seen him.

“Sal…” He reached for me again, but I backed away.

“No, Becks.” I was back to English. I wanted him to understand this time. “I can’t do this anymore. Let’s call it off, okay?”