A Momentary Marriage(125)

“Isn’t she beautiful?” Laura looked up at him, her face glowing in a way that made his heart swell in his chest.

“Yes,” he replied, his eyes on Laura’s face.

“Would you like to hold her?” Laura held the child toward him.

James’s eyes widened, and he looked at the child in consternation. He cleared his throat. “Well, ah, I—”

Laura simply handed the baby to him, and he could do nothing but take her or drop her. The little girl seemed far less uneasy about the situation than he. Anna grabbed his lapel in a firm hold, crumpling it in her wet hand, and wriggled until she was firmly in the crook of his arm. She was heavier than he had expected, more substantial, which reassured him somewhat that he wouldn’t accidentally break her.

She was a pretty thing, he reflected, looking into her huge blue eyes. He tried to imagine her with soft blond curls, her eyes in Laura’s shade of blue. Anna leaned closer to him and grinned as if they shared a delightful secret, and he couldn’t help but chuckle.

“Hello, Anna.” James stroked his knuckle down her cheek. It was, he discovered, incredibly soft. He looked over at Laura, watching him with a smile. “Um, I’d better hand her back to you now.”

Laura took the baby, and they sat down to visit. Anna was passed about from one woman to another, all of them obviously entranced by her. Graeme came in and joined in their admiration. James spent most of the time watching Laura. He wondered uneasily if this had been some sort of test. Had he passed or failed?

Later, as they walked out to their carriage, he took Laura’s hand and said, “That was truly why you visited here? To see the baby?” At her nod, he went on, “Why didn’t you tell me? Or ask me to escort you? It seemed you visited when I was busy elsewhere.”

Her brows lifted. “I didn’t imagine you were interested in cooing over a baby.”

“Mm. You might be right.”

“So I called on them when you were busy or somewhere else so that I . . .” Her cheeks reddened. “So I wouldn’t take away time that I could spend with you.”

He glanced at her, surprised and warmed.

Laura went on quickly, “I didn’t say anything because I was afraid you would find me silly and sentimental. Maudlin.”

“Don’t,” he said, his voice almost fierce, and he stopped, staring into her eyes. “I know I am cynical and even caustic, but I would never not want to know what you think or feel. I would hate it if I made you fear me in any way.”

“I don’t fear you,” she said firmly. “It was embarrassment I worried about, and that came more from myself than you. I didn’t want to reveal how I felt about you, how much I wanted a life with you.” She sighed. “I told you that you were a coward, but I was, too. I was scared, so scared, of giving you my whole heart. It hurt before to love someone, but I knew it would be so much worse to love you and not have your love in return.”

“Laura.” He cupped her face in her hands and bent to kiss her gently. “You never have to worry about that.” He continued to gaze at her for a moment. “Do you want a child? My child?”

“Oh, yes. More than anything.”

He would, he thought, give her anything when she looked at him like that. “Then we’re in luck, because I’m happy to spend many, many hours on the task.”

He kissed her again, until finally she pulled away breathlessly, saying, “James . . . we’re on the front drive. Everyone could be watching us.”

“I have no shame where you’re concerned.” As if to prove it, he went down on one knee.

Laura stared. “James! What—”

“Shh. Let me get this out. I’ve been trying ever since I returned, but I hadn’t yet worked up the courage.”

Laura nodded, waiting. He took her hand between his.

“Before, when I asked you to marry me, I botched it. I can only be glad that you were desperate enough to take me up on it. I gave you a number of reasons why I wanted to marry you and why you should be willing to marry me. They were all, in retrospect, quite worthless. So I want another chance.”

“You want to propose?” She lifted her brows. “Even though we’re already married?”

“Yes. I want to get it right this time. I’ve been a fool far too many times and I suspect I’ll prove myself one again before long. So I want you to be certain of my feelings for you—no matter how many times I might say the wrong thing or not understand you or lead with my head instead of my heart. I realized finally that there’s only one good reason to marry you, and that is because I love you. You are the center of my life, and everything I have would mean nothing if you were not with me. You’re all I want, all I need. This time I want to pledge to you not only my hand but my heart. I want to be with you the rest of my life . . . and forever after that, as well. Laura, will you do me the very great honor of marrying me?”