A Mate for the Senator (Brion Brides 9)(8)

"Having been one myself, I would naturally have no idea that's how it is," she said darkly. "Of course a fight to the death is different. Don't insult me. I was a general. I have met every general Brions have had in the last ten years and seen all of them fight. When I tell you my opinion, you do not get to discredit that because your pride is wounded."

That was true. At the back of his mind, Xaven knew that Eleya had a point, just like he was certain that she knew a Brion warrior wouldn't sit and listen to being chided like a child.

"I will not challenge a general to a duel to prove you wrong," he said instead. "As I told you, I have no interest in being one."

Eleya's eyes flickered to Briolina, visible from the balcony a few feet from them. The planet glowed in the morning light, as gorgeous as ever. It made Xaven pull back a little. Every Brion had a natural connection to their home world, a protectiveness that couldn't be denied or fought.

He was about to say something, anything to make things up with Eleya.

"I meant it, you know," she said. "About wishing our lives were reversed. I would give anything to be a general again."

As soon as the words came out of Xaven's mouth, he knew that he was messing up everything he'd won the day before.

"You need to let it go," he said.

Eleya's gaze snapped back to him, fast as lighting. The look there was so furious Xaven didn't rule out the possibility that she would fetch her spear and duel him for real.

That was never going to happen. The bond was made whole between them. Even being mad, even disagreeing with Eleya, Xaven would still have died for her. Eleya was his gesha, his true heart and there was nothing in the galaxy that could have made him let go of her. Which made what followed so hard to bear.

"Let go of the one thing that made me who I am?" Eleya asked. "All I ever wanted was to be a general. It was what I was born to be."

"Maybe," Xaven allowed. "But you're not one anymore. The Elders in their wisdom decided that you were better suited for the position you have now, and your fellow generals agreed."#p#分页标题#e#

"Of course they agreed," Eleya said through gritted teeth. "It's easier for them to deal with me, but the main reason they agreed was that they were all more relieved than they'd ever been in their lives that it wasn't them."

"That may be," Xaven said. "It changes nothing. You are not going to go back. And you just told me that talented people need to serve Briolina and our people where they are needed. You are needed here. That means you need to let go."

"No," Eleya said.





7





Eleya





The next few weeks were tense between Eleya and her gerion.

After the first fight, they had wordlessly agreed to disagree and carried on with their lives. That had the unfortunate side-effect of feeling like they were two strangers living together instead of being a fated couple.

It was a deadlock, but it had its moments of pleasure – and surprise.

The realization was bitter for Eleya when Xaven returned the night after their fight with a small package that he took to the bathroom. When Eleya followed him, curious, the warrior was already undressing.

"Come," he called her, pointing to the bath in the corner.

Hot water was already pouring into the tub.

Hesitating, Eleya had considered telling her gerion that he needed to apologize first, but the words never left her lips. Xaven had stripped naked and climbed into the tub. There, he slowly and carefully started unwrapping the package he'd brought.

Eleya watched as small bottles of massage oil emerged from there, all her favorites.

"How did you know?" she asked, sliding the sleeves of her long dress over her shoulders and letting it drop to the floor.

Xaven's answer was delayed for a second as he stared at her, standing half-naked and removing her panties.

"I asked your aide, Towaren," the warrior replied.

The sharp gaze held Eleya for a long moment.

"Tell me he doesn't know from experience," Xaven growled. "If he has laid a finger on you, he's a dead man."

Eleya couldn't keep the soft chuckle from her lips.

"No," she said, joining her gerion in the bath. "He just runs errands for me."

"Good," Xaven replied and got to work.

The massage was incredible. The warm water kept Eleya in a comforting cocoon and Xaven's hands on her skin were amazing. Her valor squares pulsed pleased light green shadows in the bathroom.

Just like that, the fight seemed to go away. Or at least, she managed to forget about it for a while. There were more important things on her mind. As Xaven continued to rub her, eventually slipping a hand between her legs and making Eleya moan in need, she realized how deeply she'd been wounded.

Her first gerion would never have done anything like that, wouldn't have cared for her after a hard day's work. Especially after a disagreement.

Eleya had never thought that Eren had gotten to her, but apparently he had. She had fully expected Xaven to be the same, to come back to her still mad or not come back at all.

The warrior made her scream again and again. Water splashed to the floor, flooding the entire bathroom as Xaven fucked her, his hands fisted into her long dark hair. Eleya cried out his name and for a divine moment there, she believed that everything was going to be alright again.

She found that it was hard to forget.

Lying in bed that night, Xaven kissed her, running his hands over her body. The touch that Eleya had welcomed before didn't suit her now. She pushed him away, seeing the same look of betrayal in Xaven's eyes as she'd witnessed when they fought.

The warrior pressed his hand against her heart. Eleya watched him listen before raising his sharp gaze to her.

"I can feel it beating," Xaven told her. "And I swore to make it beat for me. This is the second time now that you're pulling away from me when you've been perfectly happy with me moments before.

"I can't break into a heart that protects itself so hard. Why are you keeping me at arm's length?"

Eleya didn't know.

"Oaths are a good thing," she replied. "They keep us going, fighting toward something. But just because you promised doesn't mean it's going to happen, or happen soon. It's not a battle won in advance. You can't expect things to get gradually better because you put enough hours in. That's not how it works."

Xaven didn't reply for a long time.
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"That may be true," he admitted. "A Brion can win any battle, but even we can't handle impossibility. You think this is a fair fight, but it's not. You are putting up walls without a reason."

"Everything has a reason," Eleya argued.

"Then tell me," Xaven prompted, taking her hand. "Tell me the reason."

"I would if I knew," she replied.



It had gone nowhere that night and the nights that came after followed suit.

From time to time, Eleya let her gerion closer. They shared a timeless moment of happiness, wrapped together in their passion for each other. The warrior made her body sing and brought her pleasure she had never believed existed in the world.

And every time, she went cold again. After a while, it started bothering Eleya as much as it did her gerion.

Dark thoughts she'd had in the past returned. Perhaps she wasn't capable of love. Perhaps she was too wounded from her first bond to deserve or enjoy the second chance.

It infuriated her.

Eleya wasn't resistant to love. With every ounce of her being, she wanted to love Xaven, but the emotion simply didn't come.

Instead of it, there was a strange numbness, a feeling of seeing double. She looked at the captain and thought that he was perfect for her in every way. When she checked again, Eleya could almost catch the shadow of the something that bothered her before it slipped through her fingers again.

It was all revealed to her two weeks after their fight when she went down to the arenas to watch Xaven train.

The evening was nice and warm outside, but Eleya welcomed the damp coldness of the underground arena. The High Senator sneaked in without being seen, to watch Xaven in secret. The nagging doubt hadn't left her for days now. There had to be some kind of an explanation, but Eleya couldn't grasp it.

Xaven was incredible.

The arena was filled with AIs and battle mechs. Her fated dashed and surged between them, a hundred sharp blades ready to cut him to pieces without mercy. Brions never trained with anything that couldn't kill them if they were careless. Having safety measures in check didn't push a warrior to their limits. Brions hadn’t gotten to be the most feared warrior race in existence by giving themselves a pass.

Eleya watched, her warrior soul judging every move Xaven made.

She came to the conclusion that she'd been right. Xaven might have been a general on four, maybe five of the Brion flagships. He was powerful and quick, smart enough to see opportunities to go in for the kill and even smarter to know when he needed to wait.

He truly was one of the most gifted fighters on Briolina.

Eleya was walking down the steps toward the arena before she realized she was moving. The problem had finally clicked in her head.

Xaven saw her coming and quickly cut through the last mechs remaining in his path. The ease with which he did that told Eleya she'd been right. The program Xaven had set was nowhere near his level of skill.

It was ironic that Xaven thought she underestimated him, when in truth the fault was all his.