The Private Serials Box Set(53)

"What have you and Sam been up to? Did you beat her to the shower?" I  leaned back against the counter, crossing my arms over my chest.

Piper let out a loud and humor-filled, "Ha!" and continued to prep the  coffee then reached into the cupboard to grab two mugs. "She couldn't  have beat a snail. She was literally crawling to the apartment." She put  the mugs down, closed the cupboard door, and then turned to face me. "I  know you and Lena are deep in the honeymoon phase of being reunited,  but I'm starting to miss you both."         

     



 

Piper's brown eyes met mine and I couldn't ignore the sadness I saw  there, the loneliness. We'd spent a year or so apart-her in NYC while I  was in Oregon-but separation for us was never easy. And now, not being  separated physically but having my time taken away from her, well, I  could understand how she felt. We weren't children, we could handle our  emotions just fine, but there was something special about being a twin.  Another dimension of connection that I was sure regular siblings didn't  feel. I missed my brothers, but not the same way I missed Piper.

I opened my arms to her and she wasted no time stepping into my embrace.  I wrapped my arms around her shoulders and felt her sigh against me,  relaxing into the hug. We stayed that way for a long moment, then she  pulled back and resumed her stance across the small kitchen, watching  the coffee drip into the pot.

"How long will you and Lena stay here?"

My hand came up and rubbed the stubble on the underside of my chin. "I  don't know. As long as she wants, I suppose. I'm not in any hurry to  leave and she's the one who's made a life here." I shrugged. "If I want  her to stay with me, I've got to make it easy for her. She deserves at  least that."

Piper nodded. "She's lucky to have you," she said with a smile, even if  it was a little sad. I tucked her sadness away in my mind, wanting to  help, but not knowing what I could do for her. I'd done everything I  could think of, everything in my power, and it seemed like her happiness  going forward was in her own hands.

"How long will you stay here?"

She shrugged. "Sam has invited me to stay with her in Portland. You know, just until I can get back on my feet."

In the two months I was separated from Lena, Sam had been an invaluable  ally to me. Sure, at first she'd literally tried to maim me, but after I  convinced her I had been set up and only wanted to help Lena, she'd  come around and become a friend. "Sam's great."

"Yeah," she said.

"You know Parker would take you in, or even Mom and Dad. You could even  stay at my place. I'm not sure when I'll be back, but you'd have privacy  there." And I could keep track of her using the surveillance equipment  that'd been installed.

She shook her head. "Parker is almost as overprotective as you are and  would make my life hell if I lived there. And you know how Ma is. She'd  try to set me up with all of her friends' single sons, she'd start  forcing me to go to all of her social functions-it would be  embarrassing. Besides, I get along with Sam. Plus, I think she feels a  little lonely without Lena around all the time anymore."

I'd never force Lena to go back to Portland, but if she could get past  the idea that Portland held all the terrible memories of Derrek, I feel  like there was a lot of good there, that we could be happy there again.

"Lena has to be comfortable wherever she is and I won't force her to go back there if it's not what she wants."

"No, of course not," Piper said quickly. "I guess I just wish all the  good parts of my new life could all be together. You and Lena, Sam, my  independence," she said with a small grin. "I know I came here to help  you keep tabs on her, but I really care about Lena."

"I know, Piper," I said. "And she knows it too. She'll miss you when you leave."

She smiled at my words, but the smile didn't reach her eyes. "Can we all  do dinner tonight? Maybe one of those fun luaus? I know Sam really  wants to go to one before she leaves and it would be great to spend an  evening all together."

"I don't see why not. Sounds like fun." I gave her a smile and then  stepped forward to pour some coffee into my waiting mug. I poured  Piper's too, and then reached into the refrigerator and handed her the  creamer I knew she wanted. When both our coffees were just the way we  liked them, we walked silently onto the attached balcony overlooking the  ocean. It was just early afternoon, but the heat was already making the  air muggy. We sat down next to each other and looked out to the ocean.  My hand found hers and we sat in silence, just content to be near each  other.

After nearly thirty minutes of silent contentment, Piper finally asked  the question I knew had been burning in her mind since she walked into  the apartment.

"Do you think we'll ever be together again, like, in the same state, for good?"

I gave her hand a squeeze before pulling mine away, using both hands to  bring my coffee mug to my lips, trying to piece together an answer for  her.

"In a perfect world Lena would choose to go back to Portland and we  could all be in the same city. But I don't know if she'll ever want to  go back, and I'm not willing to pressure her about it." I took another  sip, still not looking over at Piper, knowing her face would be sad yet  strong. "If I were her, I probably wouldn't want to go back there. I  have to support that if I want her to stay with me."

"Do you remember being young and being captivated by magnets? Remember  how they either stuck together with so much force you could hardly pull  them apart, or they repelled each other and you couldn't get them to  touch if you tried?"

"Yeah," I said, quietly.

"For most our lives we were stuck to each other, Preston. I knew if I  turned around you'd be there. I could feel your presence all around me,  supporting me, backing me up. It was something I could always count on.  But, suddenly, one of us flipped over and now it's as if we're pushing  each other away."

"I'm not pushing you away, Piper. I could never do that." I'd never  heard her talk this way, never gotten this vibe from her at all.

"No," she said, turning her head away from me, pretending to look out to  the ocean as she used the hand farthest from me to wipe her cheek,  trying to hide her tears. "But, we're going in opposite directions, and  it feels more permanent now than it ever did before."

I knew my little sister was trying to come to terms with the fact she  wasn't the only important woman in my life. I also knew it had nothing  to do with how she felt about Lena. Piper loved Lena-of that I was  sure-but this was the first time I'd ever let my future depend on  someone else and Piper was feeling the gravity of the situation.

"You're always going to be my twin sister, my baby twin sister. My  relationship with Lena isn't going to change that and she wouldn't want  it to; she loves you. I'll always be here for you in any way I can."  Piper still wouldn't look at me, but I could tell there was more than  one tear to wipe away when her hands brushed over her face. After a few  moments, she finally turned to look at me, her face red and blotchy.

"I'm so happy you found Lena," she said, smiling weakly through tears.  "This is just the first time I've felt truly alone in a while."

"You're not alone, Piper."

"I am, Preston. I am alone, and as sad as I am right now, I know that  being alone is what I need. I am one hundred percent, completely aware  of the fact that I need to work on me." She took in a deep breath and  then sighed it out loudly. "It's just hard to think about being  separated from you again and being on my own."

She was right. In all our years together, since birth, she'd never been  on her own. She was either always with me or with a boyfriend. I hadn't  realized it until she'd said it, but it was true. And based on her last  relationship and how it had ended so disastrously, she didn't need to be  jumping into another one any time soon.

"I don't really know what to say," I admitted. As much as I felt the  need to protect her, to keep her safe, I knew that with Lena was where I  was supposed to be. Lena was who needed me the most. Piper needed to  find herself.

"Just tell me I'll be all right and that you'll never be too far away,"  she said, looking exactly half sad and half happy, as if she were torn  completely in two.

"You're going to be fine, Piper, and I'll always be here for you."

"You're the best big brother ever," she said, smiling more, true happiness pushing out the sad.

All I could do was return her smile, hoping she found herself sooner rather than later.

We both turned our heads back toward the apartment when we heard  movement from inside. I watched as Lena's slender body walked out of the  hallway and into the kitchen. She'd put on some sleep shorts and a tank  top, looking sexy and sleepy all at the same time.