Surrender My Love(14)

LATER THAT AFTERNOON Leesa had lunch with Shannon, Tempe, and Jewel on the patio of Mr. B’s overlooking the marina. It was a picture-perfect day, with sailboats crawling across the water in the distance, a young family fishing off of one of the piers, and best of all, Leesa had a clear view of Cole as he, Nate, and their father worked on the sailboat. She’d spent most of the morning trying to process his gracious reaction to her past. When she’d gone back to Tegan’s, Tegan had been busy editing photographs for her sister Cici’s business, which had left Leesa alone with her thoughts, giving her the opportunity to pick apart the emotions that swamped her. How could she already feel closer to Cole than she had felt to Chris after dating for almost two years? She tried to blame it on the relief that had come from her confession, but she somehow innately knew that even if she’d met Cole before her nightmare had begun, they’d still be drawn together like metal to magnet. By the time she met the girls for lunch, she felt like a week had passed, rather than a few short hours.

Now she tried to concentrate on her new friends, but it was difficult when Cole was just down the hill, shirtless, his tanned skin glistening in the afternoon sun. Sitting on his lap this morning, she’d had the urge to rip his shirt off and lie beneath him. To feel the hard planes of his bare flesh pressed against her. To feel him inside her. The quickness of those urges had surprised her. With Chris she’d waited a few weeks before they’d ended up in bed. Weeks. Not days or hours. Sounds of laughter carried up to where she sat. She glanced that way, catching Cole midlaugh, one hand on his father’s shoulder, the other pointing at Nate, who was shaking his head. He was a beautiful sight, so unreserved and free. He was an intensely serious guy. That much she’d seen, and she liked that about him. But this. The unencumbered Cole tugged at her insides, too. She wanted to see more of both.

“So anyway,” Shannon continued, bringing Leesa’s attention back to the conversation. “A few weeks after returning to Weston, I’ll be living in the wilderness to carry out the study.”

“Living? Like camping?” Jewel asked. She tucked her blond hair behind her ear and scrunched her nose.

“Yes. I’m actually looking forward to it.” Shannon sipped her iced tea. “I love nature.”

“I’ve never been camping, but it’s something I’d like to try one day,” Leesa said.

“Never?” Tempe asked. “Our father believed that we all needed to master basic survival skills by the time we were seven. He was in the military for only a few years before he lost his left leg from the knee down after a jumping accident. It never healed properly and they had to amputate, but that didn’t stop him from doing everything and teaching us to do it all, too.” She laughed, bumping Shannon with her elbow.

Leesa thought of Ace’s gait and the way he sometimes had a pained look in his eyes when he thought no one was looking. She had wondered if that look was caused by something emotional, like a memory, or physical. Now she had her answer.

“Once a military man always a military man,” Shannon said. “Right, Jewel?”

“You’re telling me? Nate is always prepared, and he watches over me to make sure I’m always prepared, which I never am.” Jewel turned to Leesa and explained. “Nate was in the army with my older brother, Rick.” Her eyes became hooded, and Tempe reached over and patted her hand. “Rick never made it home.”

Leesa’s heart ached for her new friend. “I’m so sorry.”

“Thanks. It was really hard. We lost Rick just four years after we lost my father, and I have three younger siblings. It was tough.” She pulled her shoulders back and smiled a resilient smile. “But we made it, and I’m glad Nate came back.”

“I lost my father when I was twenty-five. I know how difficult it can be to try to move on.” Sharing her life with the girls came easily, and as each of their faces filled with empathy and a collective aww surrounded her, their emotions were as genuine as an embrace.

“How did your mom take it?” Tempe asked.

“I’ve never known my mother. My father raised me. It was always just me and him.” She felt the familiar thickening in her throat, remembering how alone she’d felt for the longest time after she’d lost her father. She couldn’t count the number of times she’d reached for the phone to share something that had happened with him. And when she’d been accused of touching Andy, she’d wished he was there to tell her everything would be okay. It was one thing to hear it from friends, but her father had always been her rock, and ever since she was a little girl, if he said something would be okay, she’d believed him. Even now the emptiness inside her was like an arid well she visited often, hoping for a miracle. Her miracles came in the form of memories, and she cherished each and every one.

Shannon reached out and hugged her. “No one should be without a mother.” She drew back and smiled at Leesa. “We’ll just have to share ours with you.”

Leesa laughed and Tempe smiled. “You laugh, but she’s serious. Once she hears about your parents, she’ll start to mother you like she does everyone else she thinks needs comfort in their life. It’s one of her strengths.”

“Or weaknesses, depending on who you ask,” Shannon said. “When I was a teenager, she was super nice to even the creepiest boys.”

“You only thought they were creepy because they all wanted to go out with you,” Tempe said. “And you were too busy in the science lab to worry about them.”

“Well, your parents have both been really kind to me,” Leesa said as she glanced down at Cole again. He was sanding the deck of the boat, working head-to-head with Nate. “Your whole family has been wonderful. I love that you’re all so close.”

“It’s kind of sickening, isn’t it? Like a real-life Brady Bunch.” The glint of mischief in Jewel’s blue eyes told Leesa she was kidding.

“So, tell us about your plans, Leesa,” Tempe said. “Mom said you moved from Towson. What did you do there? And do you miss it?”

Leesa’s stomach clenched. She already felt comfortable enough with the girls that she couldn’t imagine lying to them, but she was still nervous about sharing the truth, so she started small. “I’m not sure moved is the right word. I’m feeling things out right now, figuring out my next move. But I do miss the Girl Power group I ran.”

“You taught Girl Power?” Tempe’s eyes widened. “I’m a music therapist, and one of my patients was asking me about it. She said they have them all over Maryland but not here.”

“What’s Girl Power?” Shannon asked.

“It’s a group for girls,” Leesa explained. “Our focus was helping girls gain self-confidence and boost their self-esteem, which we did through group activities and friendship. Our meetings usually began with catching up on the good things that happened to each of the girls between meetings, and we talked about anything they were concerned about or had difficulty with. We usually did a bit of fun exercise, like take a walk, jog, play basketball, or other activities. We went on outings and basically tried to build the girls up about themselves and help them with the tools to handle whatever came at them.” Thinking about the girls in the group made her miss them even more. “I ran the group with my friend Patty. Girls came and went—you know how that is. Girls could join at eight years old, and their interest waxed and waned as they got involved in other things, but we always had at least six or seven members.”

“I wish they’d had that when I was growing up. Not that I would have had time for it, but it would have been fun to have a group of girls to do something productive with,” Jewel said. “My younger sister Krissy would probably love that. Would you consider starting a group here? She’s a total social butterfly. If only we could get her to focus on her schoolwork as much as her dance lessons and social calendar.”

Leesa bit back the urge to offer to help Krissy with her studies. She’d been so wrapped up in getting over the pain of what had happened that she’d pushed away the ache of no longer teaching. She missed it.

“I could help you set up a group,” Tempe said.

Shannon laughed. “You don’t exercise other than using your delicate fingers to strum a guitar or play the piano.”

“I could help in other ways.” Tempe pulled a notebook from her purse.

“Here she goes.” Shannon rolled her eyes. “She’s going to write a song about Girl Power.”

Leesa was too busy trying to figure out how to tell them she couldn’t start a group to enjoy their teasing banter.

“No, I’m not,” Tempe said. “I was going to make a note to look into it.”

“Seriously, Tempe is super organized,” Shannon said to Leesa. “If anyone could help you start something like that, it’s her.” She smiled at Tempe and said, “She could also write a kick-ass song about it, though.”

“Do you really think the girls around here would be interested? Aren’t they more focused on hitting the beach every afternoon?” The thought of working with kids again was terrifying. She hoped they told her she was right and that it was a silly idea. She felt like a transient hiding from a torrid past.