Shelter Me Home(11)

What could she say? What was there to say that would save her from this  unwelcome pain? Miles had thrown her away, and she'd latched onto the  first nice man she'd seen. Oh, she could blame it on the hormones, but  she'd liked Aanon since they were children. Out of everyone she'd known  growing up, she had thought about him the most.

Of course, he was with someone. She was probably beautiful and kind and  perfect because that's what he deserved. A knocked up former dweeb with  the inability to stand on her own wasn't the type of woman he was  looking for. She almost wanted to laugh at how silly she'd been.

"Sorry, I didn't know." Shifting into drive, she tapped the gas and  eased out of the parking lot. "Please don't change your mind about me  living at the homestead." When she looked at him, he was facing away,  watching the passing shops out the window. She was losing her home, one  she'd grown so attached to over the past couple days.

If she could only explain that he had nothing to worry about with her.  "I was with a man in New York. We met when I was serving him and his  friends drinks at a high-end bar on the Upper East Side. He'd just made  partner at his law firm, and they were celebrating that night."

"What's his name?"

"Miles. He asked for my number, and I thought it was a joke. Why would a  powerful man like that be interested in the wait staff, you know? So I  refused, and he came the next night, and the next until I finally gave  him a way to contact me. He didn't call for weeks after that, and I  didn't really think anything about it. I'd predicted it was all about  the chase for a man like him. But then, out of the blue, I get this  call, and we talked for hours. Instant chemistry and all, and I thought,  this is it. This is the man I'm going to marry. I was just so certain  because that's what my heart told me, and my heart couldn't be wrong."                       
       
           



       

She took a right at the fork in the road.

"I was with him for four years. We talked about marrying and starting a  family. He wanted children so badly, and I wanted to give them to him  someday. Every holiday I waited for a proposal because he talked about  it so much, and we both knew that was where we were headed. We were it  for each other. And then a few weeks ago I was feeling off. I took a  test and found out I was pregnant, and God, I was so happy. I just knew,  knew, he was going to be ecstatic, and suddenly it didn't matter if we  got married or not. We worked the way we were, and we'd be a family even  without a ring or a piece of paper telling us so. Two days after I  found out, I planned a big surprise dinner to tell him. Miles came to my  apartment, and I was dressed up and had my hair done. I'd wrapped these  little striped baby booties in a box for him and put them in my purse  to give him at just the right moment. We walked down to one of our  favorite restaurants, and I just couldn't stop smiling."

A tear spilled over and rolled down her cheek, and she dashed it away with the back of her hand.

"He was so quiet, and when the server brought our meal out, he said he  needed to talk to me." Inhaling sharply, she clamped her lips closed  until she could get a hold of her emotions. "He was married. He and his  wife had been married for ten years. For the entire four years I thought  I was dating the man of my dreams, he'd been molding me into the other  woman. His mistress. I'd had an affair, and all without my permission. I  broke it off with him immediately and didn't tell him about the baby. I  felt disgusted. I couldn't look at myself in the mirror, and every  special moment from our relationship suddenly felt like a lie. I felt so  bad for what I'd done to his wife, and she didn't even know about me."  She raked her gaze to his. "So you see, I'll never be the other woman  again. You don't have to worry about me being unprofessional about our  business arrangement. I'd never hurt Erin by going after you. Please  don't make me leave."

"Is that why you came back to Cooper Landing?" Aanon's voice sounded ragged, as if it was being ripped from his throat.

"No. I wasn't running from the relationship. I moved back for my baby.  Miles wanted a child so badly, and he and his wife have been trying for  years. He's a big powerful lawyer, and who am I? I'm a nobody. I was  afraid he'd take the choice away from me. He'd take my child away from  me."

"Not all men are like that, you know. What he did to you? Not all men  would do that, and someday you'll find someone worthy of you. Don't let  what he's done take that away from you. And you're wrong."

"About what?"

"You aren't a nobody."

The heat finally started working as she pulled the truck in front of the  big house. She hadn't spoken during the miles closest to home. Instead,  much more pressing matters weighed on her, such as how in Hades she was  going to tug her heartstrings from Aanon completely.

"Goodnight," she said as she hurried toward the cattleman's cabin.

Turning when she didn't hear the passenger door shut, Aanon stood  leaning on the open door, watching her, his expression lost in the night  shadows.

Even standing fully clothed, he was a captivating man, and she jerked  her gaze to the jangling cattlemen's cabin keys in her hand. She would  need to train her heart to ignore him. It was possible her survival  depended on her ability to do so.





Chapter Six


Luna whined from under the bed, and Farrah's half-hearted attempts to pat her with sleepy fingers didn't make any difference.

"Okay, girl. You need to go potty?"

Probably. With a roll and tumble out of bed, Farrah waited a few moments  to make sure she wasn't going to get sick. Her nausea had been easing  over the last few days, and she lived in a constant state of suspicion  that it would come back at any moment.

When nothing happened, she pulled her snow boots over her flannel pajamas and slid into her jacket.

Luna bounded off for the Chevy as soon as her door was open and rubbed  her body against Aanon like an overgrown wolf-cat. He stood in front of  the bed, shoving little gold bullets into a rifle. The crack of metal on  metal filled the early morning air.

"What are you doing?" she asked as she approached.

"Doctor Jansen called," he answered without turning around. His voice  was as cold as the morning air. Thick pants covered his legs and he'd  donned his heaviest jacket. A camouflage toboggan covered his head, and  even in the early light, determination was written all over his stiff  posture.                       
       
           



       

"And?"

"And you're low on iron. Doc wants to switch vitamins on you, and we need to get more red meat into your diet."

"So you're going hunting?"

"For bear. It's late in the season but I might catch one before he goes down to hibernate for the winter."

"Yeah, but I know for a fact we have hamburger in the freezer on the  back porch. I checked the other day. Couldn't I just eat that?"

He spun and hoisted the rifle over his shoulder. "And then what? What  happens when we run out of hamburger in the middle of winter, Farrah?  You can't just eat enough iron for a little while. You're growing a  human being who isn't getting enough of something."

She couldn't find her voice until he'd loaded the gun on the rack at the  front of the biggest four-wheeler. He wasn't the same gentle man he'd  been last night. In fact, he was doing his best to ignore her completely  as he pulled an orange backpack over his shoulders.

"What did I do wrong?" she asked.

"I have to travel a ways to get where the bears are. Won't be back until after dark."

The engine of the ATV was deafening in the silence, and he pulled away before she could even mutter, "Be careful."

She would've gone if he'd just asked.

The day turned out to be the longest one of her life. Confusion consumed  her thoughts as she went about her duties around the homestead. Maybe  he was mad that he had to hunt for her, but she hadn't asked him to. And  why did Doctor Jansen call Aanon with her test results and not even ask  to talk to her? Sure, Aanon was the one with the cell phone, but still.  He could've left a message to come by the office or something.

Perhaps Aanon was still mad about the moment they'd shared in the truck  last night. Her fingers itched to press against his chest again, to feel  the racing heartbeat of such a capable man and know that she'd caused  it.

Okay, if he was mad that he had to leave the homestead, she'd just make  sure he had as little to do as possible when he got home that night. And  so she threw herself into taking care of everything she could before  her shift at Briney's.

****

After a long shift, Farrah came home that night to see the ATV out by  the barn with its lights on. The shift had been slow, and she'd had too  much time to think, so she'd thoroughly convinced herself Aanon needed a  stern talking to.