His Final Bargain(6)

And then she had looked into his eyes and said no.

'Have you heard the exciting news?' Georgie said as soon as Eliza got to  school the following day. 'We're not closing. A rich benefactor has  been found at the last minute. Can you believe it?'

Eliza put her bag in the drawer of her desk in the staffroom. 'That's wonderful.'

'You don't sound very surprised.'

'I am,' Eliza said, painting on a smile. 'I'm delighted. It's a miracle. It truly is.'

Georgie perched on the edge of the desk and swung her legs back and  forth as if she was one of the seven-year-olds she taught. 'Marcia can't  or won't say who it is. She said the donation was made anonymously. But  who on earth hands over a million pounds like loose change?'

'Someone who has a lot of money, obviously.'

'Or an agenda.' Georgie tapped against her lips with a fingertip. 'I wonder who he is. It's got to be a he, hasn't it?'

'There are female billionaires in the world, you know.'

Georgie stopped swinging her legs and gave Eliza a pointed look. 'Do you know who it is?'

Eliza had spent most of her childhood masking her feelings. It was a  skill she was rather grateful for now. 'How could I if the donation was  made anonymously?'

'I guess you're right.' Georgie slipped off the desk as the bell rang. 'Are you heading down to Suffolk for the summer break?'

'Um … not this time. I've made other plans.'

Georgie's brows lifted. 'Where are you going?'

'Abroad.'

'Can you narrow that down a bit?'

'Italy.'

'Alone?'

'Yes and no,' Eliza said. 'It's kind of a busman's holiday. I'm filling in for a nanny who needs to take some leave.'

'It'll be good for you,' Georgie said. 'And it's not as if Ewan will mind either way, is it?'                       
       
           



       

'No … ' Eliza let out a heavy sigh. 'He won't mind at all.'





CHAPTER THREE


WHEN ELIZA LANDED in Naples on Friday it wasn't a uniformed driver  waiting to collect her but Leo himself. He greeted her formally as if  she were indeed a newly hired nanny and not the woman he had once  planned to spend the rest of his life with.

'How was your flight?' he asked as he picked up her suitcase.

'Fine, thank you.' She glanced around him. 'Is your daughter not with you?'

His expression became even more shuttered. 'She doesn't enjoy car  travel. I thought it best to leave her with the agency girl. She'll be  in bed by the time we get home. You can meet her properly tomorrow.'

Eliza followed him to where his car was parked. The warm air outside was  like being enveloped in a thick, hot blanket. It had been dismally cold  and rainy in London when she left, which had made her feel a little  better about leaving, but not much.

She had phoned Ewan's mother about her change of plans. Samantha had  been bitterly disappointed at first. She always looked forward to  Eliza's visits. Eliza was aware of how Samantha looked upon her as a  surrogate child now that Ewan was no longer able to fulfil her dreams as  her son. But then, their relationship had always been friendly and  companionable. She had found in Samantha Brockman the model of the  mother she had always dreamed of having-someone who loved  unconditionally, who wanted only the best for her child no matter how  much it cost her, emotionally, physically or financially.

That was what had made it so terribly hard when she had decided to end  things with Ewan. She knew it would be the end of any further contact  with Samantha. She could hardly expect a mother to choose friendship  over blood.

But then fate had made the choice for both of them.

Samantha still didn't know Eliza had broken her engagement to her son  the night of his accident. How could she tell her that it was her fault  Ewan had left her flat in such a state? The police said it was 'driver  distraction' that caused the accident. The guilt Eliza felt was an  ever-present weight inside her chest. Every time she thought of Ewan's  shattered body and mind she felt her lungs constrict, as if the space  for them was slowly but surely being minimised. Every time she saw  Samantha she felt like a traitor, a fraud, a Judas.

She was responsible for the devastation of Ewan's life.

Eliza twirled the ring on her hand. It was too loose for her now. It had  been Samantha's engagement ring, given to her by Ewan's father, Geoff,  who had died when Ewan was only five. Samantha had devoted her life to  bringing up their son. She had never remarried; she had never even dated  anyone else. She had once told Eliza that her few short happy years  with Geoff were worth spending the rest of her life alone for. Eliza  admired her loyalty and devotion. Few people experienced a love so  strong it carried them throughout their entire life.

The traffic was congested getting out of Naples. It seemed as if no one  knew the rules, or if they did they were blatantly ignoring them to get  where they wanted to go. Tourist buses, taxis, cyclists and people on  whining scooters all jostled for position with the occasional  death-defying pedestrian thrown into the mix.

Eliza gasped as a scooter cut in on a taxi right in front of them. 'That was ridiculously close!'

Leo gave an indifferent shrug and neatly manoeuvred the car into another  lane. 'You get used to it after a while. The tourist season is a little  crazy. It's a lot quieter in the off season.'

A long silence ticked past.

'Is your mother still alive?' Eliza asked.

'Yes.'

'Do you ever see her?'

'Not often.'

'So you're not close to her?'

'No.'

There was a wealth of information in that one clipped word, Eliza  thought. But then he wasn't the sort of man who got close to anyone.  Even when she had met him four years ago he hadn't revealed much about  himself. He had told her his parents had divorced when he was a young  child and that his mother lived in the US. She hadn't been able to draw  him out on the dynamics of his relationship with either parent. He had  seemed to her to be a very self-sufficient man who didn't need or want  anyone's approval. She had been drawn to that facet of his personality.  She had craved acceptance and approval all of her life.

Eliza knew the parent-child relationship was not always rosy. She wasn't  exactly the poster girl for happy familial relations. She had made the  mistake of tracking down her father a few years ago. Her search had led  her to a maximum-security prison. Ron Grady-thank God her mother had  never married him-had not been at all interested in her as a daughter,  or even as a person. What he had been interested in was turning her into  a drug courier. She had walked out and never gone back. 'I'm sorry,'  she said. 'It's very painful when you can't relate to a parent.'                       
       
           



       

'I have no interest in relating to her. She left me when I was barely  more than a toddler to run off with her new lover. What sort of mother  does that to a little child?'

Troubled mothers, wounded mothers, abused mothers, drug-addicted  mothers, under-mothered mothers, Eliza thought sadly. Her own mother had  been one of them. She had met them all at one time or the other. She  taught their children. She loved their children because they weren't  always capable of loving them themselves. 'I don't think it's ever easy  being a mother. I think it's harder for some women than others.'

'What about you?' He flicked a quick glance her way. 'Do you plan to have children with your fiancé?'

Eliza looked down at her hands. The diamond of her engagement ring  glinted at her in silent conspiracy. 'Ewan is unable to have children.'

The silence hummed for a long moment. She felt it pushing against her ears like two hard hands.

'That must be very hard for someone like you,' he said. 'You obviously love children.'

'I do, but it's not meant to be.'

'What about IVF?'

'It's not an option.'

'Why are you still tied to him if he can't give you what you want?'

'There's such a thing as commitment.' She clenched her hands so hard the  diamond of her ring bit into the flesh of her finger. 'I can't just  walk away because things aren't going according to plan. Life doesn't  always go according to plan. You have to learn to make the best of  things-to cope.'

He glanced at her again. 'It seems to me you're not coping as well as you'd like.'

'What makes you say that? You don't know me. We're practically strangers.'

'I know you're not in love.'

Eliza threw him a defensive look. 'Were you in love with your wife?'

A knot of tension pulsed near the corner of his mouth and she couldn't  help noticing his hands had tightened slightly on the steering wheel.  'No. But then, she wasn't in love with me, either.'

'Then why did you get married?'

'Giulia got pregnant.'

'That was very noble of you,' Eliza said. 'Not many men show up at the altar because of an unplanned pregnancy these days.'

His knuckles whitened and then darkened as if he was forcing himself to  relax his grip on the steering wheel. 'I've always used protection but  it failed on the one occasion we slept together. I assumed it was an  accident but later she told me she'd done it deliberately. I did the  right thing by her and gave her and our daughter my name.'