“Tell her the truth,” he says, looking me squarely in the eye, “I don’t want this blowing up in our faces later.”
“Nothing’s going to blow up if you let me handle it. Helen and I are handling it, stop running your fucking mouth,” I warn him.
“I think you need to realize who you’re talking to Cal,” he says adjusting his cufflinks.
“The great Dexter Crestfield. I don’t give a shit. You’re supposed to be my friend, you’re not my mentor or my daddy.”
“Then stop acting like a child and I will!” he says, stepping closer to me. I’m a little surprised.
“This can go very badly for all of us. Then you know who is going to get involved? I’m trying to keep him out of it,”
“I’m not afraid of your father,” I laugh.
“Well you should be.”
“Why would he care about who the hell I marry?”
“Because you’re adding another person to the equation who you have to trust.”
“She doesn’t know anything,” I retort.
“Which means that you don’t think that you can trust her. So, if you can’t trust her to even tell her the truth about yourself, can you trust her with anything else?”
“It’s not that I don’t trust her,” I sigh, running my hands over my face.
“I want her to love me for me,” I say quietly. “Not for who I was. Not for who everyone thinks I should be.”
“I don’t want her to look at me like I’m some broken man how everyone else does.”
“If she loves you. Really loves you, she’ll understand,” he tells me squeezing my shoulder.
“If you don’t tell her, this is going to go bad. And I’m not going to fix any of it. You’re on your own.”
“The medicine’s working,” I tell him adamantly.
“So that’s what you’re placing all your cards on. A medicine that’s still under trial, that you’re the test subject for?” he asks.
“You bet on Helen, I’m betting on her too,” I retort. He shakes his head.
“Starting your marriage on secrets and lies doesn’t make for the most stable foundation,” he sighs. And I can’t help but laugh.
“So that’s not what yours and Helen’s marriage is based on?” I laugh and he scoffs almost as if he’s offended.
“Of course not. We have tons and secrets between us but they are not ours, only other peoples,” he says, squeezing my shoulder before walking away from me and back into the crowd.
I let out a deep groan. I don’t drink but I’ve never wanted one more than right now. I glance at my watch, this is fucking boring. My life almost just fell apart and I need something to distract me, I need something to intoxicate me but it won’t be anything in a bottle, but a little slinky grey dress. I work my way through the crowd avoiding meaningless conversations with people I don’t even like. It takes me about twenty minutes before I bump into Angela who's wobbling a bit having had a few too many drinks herself. She grabs my arm and pulls me into a dance.
“You and I need to talk mister,” she says, her words a bit slurred.
“How can I help you?” I joke back. Angela’s one of the few people I like. She’s smart, funny and straight forward and I know she’d go to war for Lauren which makes her okay in my book.
“L really loves you,” she says sternly.
“Well I’d hope she does,” I kid with her.
“No. I’m serious,” she pouts. “She’s never loved a guy how she loves you. You’ve changed her.” She says the last part off handedly.
“What do you mean?” I ask as she pulls my arm for me to spin her around.
“She’s grown up. Not the same naïve girl who got off the bus from Michigan,” she says, stopping her dance and motioning for me to follow her from the dance floor. Once we are we sit down at an empty table.
“You know we didn’t know what to think of you and her at first. I will admit I didn’t think you could give her what she wanted,” she continues and I wonder if this girl is a mind reader.
“I want to give her everything she wants,” I say simply.
“Good. Because she deserves it,” she says, the slur almost gone from her voice.
“A guy like you could break a girl’s heart,” she says, standing from the table. She then pats my chest.
“But you wouldn’t do that, right?” she says in my ear before gliding back on the dance floor.
I wouldn’t do that. I can’t do that.
I maneuver throughout the hall and spot Lauren grabbing a glass of champagne and heading up the stairs to the second level. I quicken my pace to catch up with her but to stay as far as I can behind her. The second floor is virtually empty, everyone being on the main floor so I know she must be as over this as I am. She walks to the end of the hall where it’s dimly lit and sits at a table alone. I take a deep breath and walk toward her.